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Thread: The Oasis - A spot for FORT parents

  1. #161
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    Quote Originally Posted by evalaruefan
    Anyone have any thoughts and suggestions about co-sleeping? I'd love to hear them whether you agree or not.
    Not a thought or suggestion, but rather a question...if you get the child to sleep in their own bed and they wake up in the middle of the night crying and come and sneek in bed with you, (or you fall asleep in their bed cause you're so tired) how do you break them of that? My husband and I don't want to encourage the co-sleeping, but both of us are so darn tired, we find that we easily fall asleep after we take her back to her own bed and get her settled in again when we lay down beside her or may not realize some nights that she even crawled into bed with us! I figure if we stop the waking up business, we could stop the bed shuffle. If anyone has any suggestions-I'd appreciate it!

    As far as the busy body people thing and germs...on the flip side, how annoying is it to have that 60/70 yr old woman come up and touch the baby all over their face and hands without even asking? I swear, sometimes I thought people might try to kidnap my kids because they got so close (and I had the wet wipe ready after they got ahold of themselves)!

  2. #162
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    Quote Originally Posted by dreaminginblond
    Wow, being an older female, I read this thread and feel like I don't have anything in common with you girls! ( I think it's awesome that you all have a place to talk about all these things.)

    My son is 21 yrs old and besides an ugly delivery because of a very large head, my son slept through the night at 2 weeks and always was a voracious eater. As a matter a fact, the worse the baby food smelled, the more he liked it.

    All I can tell all of you that really relates to anything that you've discussed so far even remotely is that the way I felt about my son from the second he was born was the most unconditional love I have ever felt. I still do. He's my only child and even though he is/always was an awesome kid, I wouldn't change one second of my life since he was born. I look at him now, a senior in college and am so proud of who he is and how he's turned out and realize that having him in my life has made me such a better person and even though it's sometimes rough being a mom, it's the best job in the whole world!

    Okie girls, sorry for the interuption.
    I just want to say that I WELCOME any comments from a mom who has lived to tell about it!

    I take LOT of encouragement from moms who have paved the way and are on the other side of what I'm going through. The idea that you have an awesome kid in college about to graduate is like a beacon of hope to me.

    I cannot agree more with what you said regarding your child making you a better person. I can't even BEGIN to list the little things. I used to be a speed demon on the road, and now could TEACH defensive driving courses! The ride home from the hospital was so life altering....that car is WAY TO CLOSE, dammit....I have precious cargo here! I've never driven the same.

    Thank you for your post, and share any time.

  3. #163
    DOMESTIC GODDESS realitycrazmom's Avatar
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    Wow! Lots of moms talking today!

    It's a long line Paulie, so get started my friend!

    I guess an apology is in order from me. I didn't mean to offend when I said that pumping is not breastfeeding.

    My SIL is really annoying and tries to talk like she's an expert in everything when it comes to babies. I was making a jab at her, not at the general consensus.

    Sorry guys!

    evalaruefan
    My daugter is a constant eater too! She's this tiny bundle of energy and has a super-high metabolism. I was nursing her every 2-3 hours because she'd burn it off so fast! Her pediatrician said that as long as the snacks are nutritious and whole foods (as opposed to a lot of processed packaged sugary stuff) let her eat away! She always has an apple in her hand. Kids are really pretty good about monitoring when they are full and hungry all on their own without a whole lot of help from us grown-ups. As long as she is eating healthy and seems to be burning it off, I wouldn't worry, just keep a close eye out if her metabolism drops so you can help her adjust accordingly.

    And to all of you guys with the wee ones that don't sleep well, my goes out to you! My kidlets will climb into bed every now and then, but they stay put in their beds for the most part.

    BRAG BUTTON [ON]
    I have been super-spoiled by my kids when it comes to sleeping. My son slept through the night a week after I brought him home--it was heaven! My daughter threw me for a loop. As I said above, she'd just burn off her feedings, so at night I would give her 1 ounce of formula and then nurse her the rest of the way. Worked like a charm! It just kept her tummy a little fuller for longer. I only did it long enough for her to get used to the idea of what sleeping through the night felt like, and then I eliminated the formula at night. Three weeks, tops!
    BRAG BUTTON [OFF]

  4. #164
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    Wow, I leave this thread for an hour and it's grown by a page! Paulie, thanks for your insightful comments. Keep them coming.

    Ineed, the touching thing drives me crazy. And how about when you're pregnant...everyone feels entitled to pat your tummy. UGH!
    I support the right to arm bears.

  5. #165
    Sexy evil genius Paulie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by evalaruefan
    Anyone have any thoughts and suggestions about co-sleeping? I'd love to hear them whether you agree or not.
    By "co-sleeping," do you mean sleeping in the same bed with Mom and Dad? Or do you mean boys and girls sharing rooms?

    In our own case, we have never really allowed the kids to sleep in the same room as us. Well, that's not exactly true. When we first brought our little girl home, we put her in bed with us the first night because we couldn't figure out any other way to get her to sleep. We were both nervous about this the next day, though. We worried about lots of things, ranging from the worst-case scenario of rolling over in the night and squishing her to having our blankets overheat/suffocate her to just having her become accustomed to sleeping in our bed instead of hers. We had friends who needed a psychologist to break their sons of the need to sleep in bed with Mom and Dad, and we didn't want to go down that road. For all three kids, then, we've used a bassinet at the base of our bed, followed by a shift to their crib when they don't appear to need the 2AM snack. Our daughter and our youngest son were very amenable to these shifts, but we had to endure an hour or more of crying from our middle son before he comprehended that he was in his room for the duration. That is, simply put, no fun at all, but it helps in the long-term.

    As far as boys and girls in the same room, our two oldest decided they wanted to room together a few months before #3 came along. We transitioned the middle guy out of his crib and into a bed in his sister's room so he was comfortable there before the baby came along. We didn't want him to feel displaced by the new guy, and it seemed to work. They're now clamoring to have the little guy move in with them when he's done with his crib (which won't be long now), and we're considering bunkbed options. Eventually, we know we'll be splitting them all up, and we have the room to support that, but for now, if they want to hang out together in their room, that's OK with us. Believe it or not, they all just stay in their room and play in the morning until Lazy-Butts Mom and Dad get out of bed and come get them. Wonder how long THAT will last.
    When you're ten years old and a car drives by and splashes a puddle of water all over you, it's hard to decide if you should go to school like that or try to go home and change and probably be late. So while he was trying to decide, I drove by and splashed him again. - Jack Handey

    Read Paulie's Precaps for Survivor:Vanuatu: 1-2-3-4-5

  6. #166
    DOMESTIC GODDESS realitycrazmom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by evalaruefan
    I wanted him to get used to the bottle too and a nurse at the hospital where I gave birth almost rippied my head off and said I couldn't mix the 2, it was bad for him.
    BIG, BIG :rolleyes.
    I hate it when people say that you can't mix the two. If you were pumping, you'd have to put it in a bottle. Yes, nipple confusion happens, but there are so many shapes and designs of bottle nipples out there these days, that something is bound to fit!

    My breastmilk was too rich for my son and it made him sugar sensitive. The Dr. tried to talk me into weaning him and going onto Nutramigen. I refused and decided to cut out all dairy from my diet and I supplemented him with Lacto-Free. It cleared itself up within 3 months, and I went back to exclusively breastfeeding.

  7. #167
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    Quote Originally Posted by evalaruefan
    About the sleep issue....my 2 year old started doing her nights at 18 months, thought that time would never come but it did. Only problem with that is she sleeps with mommy. (this can be a whole other discussion now, co-sleeping!!! I feel like I'm on Dr. Phil.com~lol)
    My 7 month old did his nights from 5 weeks but has since chosen to get up around 2-3 times a night now and has been for the past 2 months.

    Hoping that when he's a bit older he and sister will sleep in the same room and they won't feel the need to have mommy and/or dadyy with them. Anyone have any thoughts and suggestions about co-sleeping? I'd love to hear them whether you agree or not.

    My boys were born 18 months apart. We co-slept with our first, because I was a paranoid "is he breating" new mom, and he breastfed at least 3X a night, and I was too exhausted to get up and down. He didn't sleep in a crib (at night) until he was weaned, about 9 or 10 months.

    With my second, he could NOT sleep in the bed. He was a very light sleeper, and any noise would wake him up. We lived in a two bedroom duplex at the time, and believe it or not, my oldest had a room (with the two cribs in it) my baby slept in the middle of a king sized bed (as a newborn/infant before rolling) and my husband and I slept ON THE FLOOR of our living room!

    As they grew and by the age of 2 years old, they were sleeping in their own beds/cribs, sharing a room. One of the things I noticed was warmth. I do live in a cold climate, but if the kids had warm jammies on, if we had warmed up their beds before putting them into it, then there seemed to be a much better chance that they would stay there. The other thing I did do was "rock" both of them to sleep in a glider rocker. We didn't have them fall asleep with us in our beds, so they never got used to falling asleep WITH mommy and daddy IN our bed.

    I'm out of this stage now, but I would say do whatever works for you, that gives you rest. I personally could not sleep with my boys after about the age of 2....they were too restless and I would not be able to sleep.

  8. #168
    Plotting spegs's Avatar
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    Okay, here's my worst baby-touching story--it still makes me cringe! When #2 was about four months, we were out at a restaurant. He was fussy so I had him over my shoulder, patting his back. This woman (old, like they always are) comes up behind me. "Oh, what a sweet baby" she says. I turn to thank her, and HER FINGER IS IN MY BABY'S MOUTH. Arrrrrrrrrrrr! I yanked him away and didn't speak to her. I was so angry that I would have said something bad. She just waved at him and moved on. People are unbelievable.

    About co-sleeping. My first son slept in our bed from the time he was 8 months old, until he was two. We moved into a new house and he got a new room and a big boy bed. My husband ended up sleeping in there with him for a least half the night until he was three, but the good news is that he's a great sleeper now, and he never is a problem at night ('course, he's the only one!). When the choice is between no sleep at all and sleeping with the kid in your bed, you get to the point when sleep takes precedence over good intentions. And if you ever make judgements about someone who sleeps with their baby, karma will come back and bite you in the butt, just ask my sister-in-law. Heh heh heh. It's hell on the love life, though, I must admit.

    I have the one now that sneaks into our room and sleeps on the floor, but it doesn't wake us up, so it's not so bad. I have no idea how to break him of it, but until it interferes with my sleep, I probably won't worry too much.

    And now, where's that back rub??
    "Look, you love me, and I love you. Maybe in a different time, a different place, this would work out. But we both know that only one of us is leaving this room alive, and I'm the one holding the flame thrower." - Film Fakers

  9. #169
    Sexy evil genius Paulie's Avatar
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    *cracks knuckles, slathers more oil* Coming right up, spegsalicious.
    When you're ten years old and a car drives by and splashes a puddle of water all over you, it's hard to decide if you should go to school like that or try to go home and change and probably be late. So while he was trying to decide, I drove by and splashed him again. - Jack Handey

    Read Paulie's Precaps for Survivor:Vanuatu: 1-2-3-4-5

  10. #170
    Plotting spegs's Avatar
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    Wow, what prompt service!
    "Look, you love me, and I love you. Maybe in a different time, a different place, this would work out. But we both know that only one of us is leaving this room alive, and I'm the one holding the flame thrower." - Film Fakers

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