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Thread: The Oasis - A spot for FORT parents

  1. #991
    FORT Fogey veejer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hepcat
    Veejer, I'm still reeling that anyone would voluntarily cultivate a crop of thistles. You'd think she would be grateful for the offer. :rolleyes
    As I said she's a self proclaimed "hippie mom", real laid back, almost anything goes. "If they grew there, they must belong there" type of thinking. One year she didn't put any veggies in one of her raised beds, and neither did she mulch it. Every weed in the area cultivated there. She called it an "Ohio Native Species Garden".
    "Fish are friends, not food, but everything else is fair game." ~ Pating, Survivor Cagayan Pool

  2. #992
    Peeking In Duxxy's Avatar
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    hm, funny.. I would have called it Plot of the Lazy Asses Garden
    "Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one."

  3. #993
    FORT Fogey
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    Sorry, Stargazer, at the loss of your kitty.
    I think everyone has given you really good advice. I agree that you should tell her the kitty died and what that means but not details about how. Believe it or not, this is one of the reasons why it is so good for children to have pets. Besides having a friend to love and take care of, they learn about death too. One day, your child will be faced with the death of an elderly friend, grandparent etc. and this will help prepare them for those unhappy times that will surely come.
    My daughters lost a pet fish when they were 2 and 3. They handled the truth well, and have handled the subsequent losses of a neighbour and great-aunt rather well also.
    I have to add, though, that I so respect the fact that you want to shield your daughter from the harshness of life, too many people don't protect their kids enough...
    Take care, and I'll pray for your predicament, if that means anything to you...
    touque

  4. #994
    RESIDENT JEDI MASTER Stargazer's Avatar
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    I just wanted to thank everyone for your support and give you an update on the kitty situation.

    My daughter would go outside and play with the other kitties and didn't mention Space, so I decided she just hadn't noticed that he was gone. I figured that I just wouldn't say anything unless she brought it up. Well, I guess she had been worried about him and just hadn't said anything to him because this morning, she went outside and started calling for him. She yelled his name and said, "are you stuck? Anya come get you!!" So, I figured it was time for "The Talk".

    I sat down next to her and braced myself for what I thought would be an intense conversation. I told her that Space wasn't coming back because he had died. That when people and animals bodies stop working right, they die. I told her that after you die, you go to heaven where God and Grandpa live and that we'll all be together there one day.

    Her response?

    "Oh, okay."



    I guess I was worried for nothing. I'm sure she might have more questions over the next few weeks or something, but she seemed perfectly happy with my explanation for now.

    Thanks again to everyone for their great advice.
    "Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter."- Yoda

    "I'll just see where Providence takes me and try to look like I got there confidently." - Craig Ferguson

  5. #995
    That's all folks! Unklescott's Avatar
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    Star, I'm glad that it wasn't as bad as you thought it would be. Kids...they're amazing aren't they?

  6. #996
    Peeking In Duxxy's Avatar
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    I'm so glad everything turned out ok for you Star. The worry we endure as parents just doesn't seem fair LOL

    Do you think our parents worried about our psyches as much as we worry about our kids?
    "Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one."

  7. #997
    Retired! hepcat's Avatar
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    That's great, Stargazer. I'm so glad you used your tingly mommy-sense to tell you the right time and place. I feel for your little Anya wanting to help her friend. Great job, Mommy! She might be looking for ways to express she is sad next. It's hard to see your child sad, but it's great when they can get their emotions out.
    You've gotta hustle if you want to earn a dollar. - Boston Rob

  8. #998
    Sexy evil genius Paulie's Avatar
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    Oh, geez, Stargazer. I can only imagine how horrible you must have felt to hear her calling for her little kitty friend. You handled it perfectly, I think. Well done. Her response is classic, too. You just can never tell with kids. You think they'll freak out about one thing, and they wind up handling it wonderfully and then freak out about something you never accounted for.

    Anyway, I'm glad it went as well as it could, considering the situation. Great job, Mama Gazer!
    When you're ten years old and a car drives by and splashes a puddle of water all over you, it's hard to decide if you should go to school like that or try to go home and change and probably be late. So while he was trying to decide, I drove by and splashed him again. - Jack Handey

    Read Paulie's Precaps for Survivor:Vanuatu: 1-2-3-4-5

  9. #999
    FORT Fogey veejer's Avatar
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    Thanks for the update, Star. I've been wondering what happened.
    "Fish are friends, not food, but everything else is fair game." ~ Pating, Survivor Cagayan Pool

  10. #1000
    Just Forting Around roseskid's Avatar
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    I've never seen this thread before until today. After what happened a few days ago, the "FORT for parents" thing caught my eye. My 17-year-old daughter totalled my car! Thank God she's ok, but oh my gosh, I still can't believe this happened. She'll be going to college next year, and my husband and I are thinking, what if this had happened hundreds of miles from us? She felt terrible, said "oh, Mom, you loved your car" and my response was, "but I love you more." So now we're just trying to figure out where we go from here. She's physically fine (airbags did their job), and now we have to determine how we're going to have her "own" up to the responsibility. Can I go back to being the mother of a two-year-old?!?
    Love The Bachelor? Catch the recap for this season's sacrificial lamb lucky guy here in Episode 1, Episode 2, Episode 3, Episode 4, Episode 5, Episode 6 and Episode 7.

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