10 Things You Should Never Do/Say When Passing Through Airport Security or Customs.
1. "Passport?!? I don need no stinkin' passport!!!"
2. Yell "Hi" to your friend, Jack
3. "Whatever you do, don't open the big, red, ticking box."
4. While faking an accent say "So, can you tell me where there are some flight training schools around here?"
5. Puke on the security guards. (trust me, I know)
6. Offer to remove your underwire bra for the guard with the metal detection wand.
7. Wear smelly socks. when you take it off, someone may think you've set off a WMD.
8. Tell them your step-dad is Osama and Cousin is Saddam