Fear Factor 02-17-03
It’s back to “normal” for everyone’s favorite game show, well, normal for this show anyway. Let’s meet this week’s victims:
Jennifer Vankirk – Liberal Arts Student from Orlando, Florida. Liberal Arts huh, well at least she has big boobs.
Derek Butler – Bellman from Valley Cottage, New York. He pushes the limits bla bla bla…
Shonda Weems – Computer Programmer from Virginia Beach, Virginia. I’m not buying this, she doesn’t look like a nerd to me.
Kamalu Kong – Firefighter from Kaimuki, Hawaii. That sounds like a great gig, what the hell is he doing here?
Kim Lichtenwalter – Communications Specialist from Charlotte, North Carolina. Uh, I’ve got nothing.
Michael Levofsky – Financial Planner from Coran, New York. He didn’t come here to lose, gee that’s good to know.
The gang walks down a deserted road and meets up with host Joe Rogan who fills them in on the rules. He then directs their attention to their first stunt:
A tractor trailer is towing tandem flat-beds along at 35 MPH. Contestants must drive a car from one flat-bed to the other, jumping the gap in between. The second flat bed has an oiled surface. They must clear the gap and stay on the second trailer to advance.
Kim is lucky #1, and while she gets into the battle gear, the others start with the trash talk. It’s not even good, just the standard blonde jokes, woman driver jokes, and the Fear Factor Classic “you’re gonna fall”. They should be eliminated for lameness. Anyway…Kim climbs behind the wheel and gets the go ahead. She punches the gas, but has her eyes closed and hits the breaks a little too soon. She didn’t hit the ramp fast enough, and the rear tires are caught in the gap. Bye-bye Kim.
Shonda is next and hits the gas as soon as she gets the green light. She clears the gap, but apparently gave it a little too much gas as she skids right off the back of the trailer. So much for confidence, get to stepping.
Mike is up next, and is leaving it to fate. That seems like a good strategy. He takes off and clears the gap, just barely getting the rear tires on the second trailer. The car comes to a dead stop with the rear tires about a foot and a half away from the gap. Damn near perfect, score one for fate.
Jen is next, as Mike runs back over and jumps in everyone’s face to return the talk. She takes off and clears the gap. She veers to the right upon hitting the second trailer but manages to stay on while teetering on the right side edge. I thought she was going over side-ways for sure, but the left side stayed on.
Derek is up next, and is still attempting to talk trash. He hits the ramp a bit crooked, and lands short and off to the right. He does not clear the gap, and is sent packing. Once again, talk is cheap.
Kamalu closes this stunt out. In what looks like a replay of Shonda’s run, he slides straight off the back with the breaks squealing. Another one bites the dust.
And then there were two. The scene cuts to a graveyard, complete with cheesy fog and sound effects. The two remaining contestants find Joe digging a hole. He climbs out to tell them that they will be buried for their next stunt, but it won’t be with dirt…
Contestants will lie in a coffin and be covered with hundreds of earthworms. They will have a breathing tube, and 3 minutes to untie a golf ball sized knot (called a monkey knot) using only their hands.
Jen wins the coin toss and decides to go first. She removes her sweater (woohoo) and climbs into the coffin. She is given earplugs, a nose clip, and the breathing tubes and the creepy crawlies are dumped in on top of her. After 3 big buckets, she is completely covered with the exception of her hands. She gets the countdown and starts in on the knot. At about 2 minutes in, she starts to get frustrated and begins to pull wildly at the clump of rope. She fails to untie the mess as time runs out, and Joe helps her out, she is covered in critters.
Since Mike is the only one left, he is now playing for 25 grand, and they will both play for the remaining 25Gs in the finals.
Mike assumes the position, and here come the worms, approximately 500 pounds worth. He panics early and ends up pulling the knot tighter, and finally runs out of time. No money for Mikey.
It’s on to the finals, and since they both failed the prize is cut to 25 grand. The contestants walk down the docks along the waterfront and Joe shows them their final stunt:
A giant rotating tube is suspended above the water. Contestants must transfer flags, one at a time, from one end to the other without falling through one of the many holes in the tube. The one that transfers the most flags will win, and if a contestant manages to get all of the flags the prize will be bumped back up to 50 grand. If they both finish with the same number of flags, the fastest time will win.
Mike wins the coin toss and chooses to let Jen go first. She gets hooked up after stripping down to a lovely 2 piece, and takes her spot at the end. She does a pretty good job, managing to get 3 flags while dropping 1 before falling through one of the holes in 1:35.4.
All eyes are on Mike as he gets ready. He starts fairly well, getting his third in 56 seconds to eliminate Jen, and continues to go after the rest. He loses his balance while going for #5 and fall through one of the holes, but it’s enough for the win.
Ladies and gentlemen, Mike is your Fear Factor champion, score another one for fate.
No scenes for next week, so stay tuned.
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