Fear Factor – 04/25/05
Welcome kids. After yet another week off the show is back and so am I. Let’s get right to it and meet the next victims:
Monique Hommerson – Bartender from Las Vegas, Nevada. Her strategy is to “be friendly”. Wonderful.
Anthony Moss – Telecommunications from Pasadena, California. For some reason he calls out Halle Berry in his intro. Maybe he’s related to Randy.
Paola Martinez – Hospital Interpreter from Phoenix, Arizona.
David Velez – Sales from Dallas, Texas. He claims to be a blonde at heart and is wearing a shirt that says “Cowboy Dave”.
Elizabeth Perry – Model / Actress from Coppell, Texas. Oh boy, a “/”. You know, she even sounds like a “Model / Actress”.
Ryan Droze – Graphic Designer from Sunrise, Florida. If his shirt was yellow, it would look just like Charlie Brown’s.
The gang makes their way through a lot and meets up with host Joe Rogan. He goes over the rules and directs their attention to the pool:
A car is set up in the pool on what looks like a giant rotisserie. Contestants will be locked into the front seat as the car spins. On “GO”, they must unlock 2 locks, make their way to the back seat, grab a flag, exit the car and swim to a buoy. The slowest man and woman will be sent home.
Liz is up first, and is giggling for no apparent reason. She claims to have “screwed the screws tight today”, whatever that means. We learn that she was once a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader (surprise, surprise). She demonstrates her flexibility by lifting her leg up by her head and putting it on Joe’s shoulder. She should win just for that alone. It’s a good thing I don’t run this show. Liz strips down to her lovely red bikini and enters the car. She gets going, and has a tough time just getting the key inside the locks. She ends up quitting on her fourth revolution without getting the locks open. On her way out, she confesses to peeing in the pool. Yep, she’s a winner alright.
Paola is next, and informs us that her pet ferret killed her mom’s parrot. She reveals a sexy white flowered bikini as she hops into the car. Paola has an easier time with the locks and is able to free herself, get the flag, and make it to the buoy in 53.9 seconds.
Monique finishes up for the girls, and the guys speculate that her ample bosom will cause her to float to the top. We’ll get a good at that as she’s sporting a beautiful hot pink bikini. Monique gets going, and promptly quits after one revolution. Maybe the guys were right, buh bye.
Dave is first for the guys, and we learn that he sells women’s clothes. We also learn that he used to be the assistant to the Director of Research at NASA. Hmmm, I can see that transition. “Cowboy Dave” gets going and is able to free himself. He grabs the flag, leaves the car, and reaches the buoy in a time of 1:13.9.
Anthony is next, and gets into it a little with Paola. She continues the smack talk as he begins. Ant frees himself, grabs the flag, and gets to the buoy in 1:03.1. Paola points out the fact that he got beat by a girl on national TV. Ain’t she sweet?
Ryan finishes this stunt, and is oddly calm. Ant gets back to the group and goes at it again with Paola. Ryan gets going, and opens the locks very quickly. He grabs the flag and makes it to the buoy in an amazing 48 seconds. That will send Dave home.
The remaining 3 head off to a restaurant.
There are six numbered boards with sushi dishes written in Japanese. Contestants will choose 2 of the boards and must finish eating both in 10 minutes if they want to move on. Since none of them can read Japanese, they are picking blindly.
Random numbers were drawn, and Anthony is up first. He chooses #1, which turns out to be: maggots, Madagascar hissing cockroaches, and sticky rice. He gets two of them. He starts with the roaches, and Paola starts with him. Ant polishes them off in good time and selects #2. This time he’ll be eating: maggots, rotten squid guts, and sticky rice in one big roll. He tears into the squid first, and then starts shoveling stuff into his mouth. Like an animal, he cleans his plate and is on to the finals.
Up next is Ryan and he chooses #3, which is: red worms, super worms, maggots, earth worms, and roaches in a “cut roll”. Once again, Ryan very calmly eats piece by piece and finishes up in 6 minutes. He picks #6, and that consists of tarantulas and sticky rice, two of them. Ryan starts by breaking apart the spiders and eating them first. He finishes with time to spare and is off to the finals with Ant.
Paola finishes this stunt and goes with #5, that is stink bugs, beetles, and sticky rice in a large roll. She closes her eyes, digs right in, and is able to finish it without much trouble. The only one left is #4, which is 3 blended shots of rotten fish sauce, squid guts, and squid ink. Paola holds her nose and downs the first one with shaky hands. Like a trooper, she is able to finish all 3 and move on to the finals with the guys.
The 3 amigos make their way to the roof of a building where they find Joe standing by the edge. He congratulates them on getting that far, and shows them the final stunt:
Walk the Plank
A six inch wide beam is hanging over the side of the building. Contestants must walk out to the end, grab flags one at a time, bring them back and stick them to the wall behind them. On “GO”, the wall will start slowly moving towards the end of the beam, eventually pushing them off. The person that gets the most flags the fastest will win.
Anthony is up first. He gets into position and starts out to the edge as the beam shakes. He comes close to falling, but is able to pull himself back up. He’s able to start grabbing flags as the wall closes in. He grabs all 8 flags in a time of 1:25.2.
Paola is next, and starts slowly moving to the edge. She continues slow and steady and gets all the flags with about 2 feet to spare. Her time is 1:26. Oh so close, 8/10 of a second.
All eyes are on Ryan as he finishes the stunt, and we learn that he’s a surfer. That should help, ya think? He gets going, wobbles a bit and comes close to falling, but makes it to the end. He picks up his pace a little, and it’s going to come down to the wire as the clock goes away. Ryan gets back over to Joe and Ant, and we find out that he finished in a time of 1:14.7.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Ryan is your Fear Factor champion!
Next week: a special “Best Friends” episode.
Coming soon: LA vs. NY, and newlyweds.
I don’t like sushi, but you can send mail, and beer, to firstname.lastname@example.org