Yay, no extra show to have to sit through.
They are simply going to make some people do the whole show before they realize they practiced for nothing, and their return fight home had been arranged all along.
They all look scared to death at the prospect of either getting the boot- or performing on a seconds notice. Gary just looks mad. Maybe he doesn’t ‘get it’ this time. They don’t even get to hang around to do the ‘Work’ routine. There is no time on the show, just goodbye kiddo - good luck with your life.
I don’t know whether I’m happy or sad about that, as ‘WORK’ kind of grew on me.
They also don’t tell us whether they are first or last in the ratings, they just start calling names. The first one picked is Serena.
She does another Braxton song –‘Breathe Again’.
Stop with the Toni B folks – give it up, you won’t do it. The sound is horrid. They have fixed the monitoring problem, but have added in an annoying echo. Horrid arrangement too, but she soldiers though, not doing too badly (considering). Give her a challenge. She’s a trooper!
Johnny says he was in LV and it was Serena all the way the whole time he was there.
Carnie – “you have a tremendous voice”
JoJo- Just says ‘Awesome’, and it’s the last thing we hear from him for a while...
Raymond Lee gets the next nod. He sings Edwin McCain’s ‘I’ll be’. This proves once and for all, they aren’t forced into doing substandard obscure show tunes. They probably only have to ask.
When Ray opens his mouth, I’m shocked. He’s another one, who seems like the voice should be coming out of someone else. He does the song up well, and I’m glad they chose contestants that weren’t out of the usual music machine mould. I would have missed this kids smiling face and attitude in the competition.
Carnie (and only Carnie) gets to comment- Great, emotional, but flat on the last note.
I’m thinking I missed something, and try and rewind live TV.I need my JoJo, but settle for some chocolate to snap me out of it.
Alex is chosen next. Please someone fix his hair. Poufy went out in the eighties for a good reason.
He does a smooth and quite decent rendition of Etta James /BB King’s ‘At Last’. He seems to be channeling Frank Sinatra with the microphone moves, but other than that, doesn’t budge. Well, we all knew Frankie could dance too.
Carnie is the only one who gets to comment again. She ‘says he has a beautiful voice and her palms are sweaty. I thought that meant you were going to get money, not that someone did a good performance. Maybe it’s itchy palms, but no matter – I’m worried about JoJo now.
Jamieson gets the next go. She sings Billie Holiday’s ‘God Bless the Child’ and makes up for last weeks mistakes, with a great performance. Since JoJo’s not allowed to talk either – I’ll say she hit it out of the park.
Johnny does get a chance to speak this time. He says he’s impressed by her turnaround from last week’s bad impression.
JoJo’s still gagged in the corner somewhere. He doesn’t even get to propose to Jamieson this week.
Brandon O’Neal is the next one to be forwarded. He’s doing Sly Stone’s “Thank you for Letting Me Be Myself”. The headset is a clue he’s not standing still. The Vocals ok, Dancing good. Performance as a whole pretty good, not great.
Carnie – You are yourself (Who else was she expecting?)
Johnny- You were better last week
JoJo is still kidnapped in an undisclosed but secure location.
We get a break, (or so I thought), with a group performance. Digging into the good, but strange choice box, they choose Ashford & Simpson’s, "Found a Cure”. Not a good choice. The dancing was stiff, but Ray and Shannon looked pretty cute. The best part was Joey and Debbie joining in at the last minute, which doesn’t say much for the rest.
Debbie takes this moment to remind people of the complicated voting structure posted online. There must have been a lot of heat from that omission last week. Legal must have briefed her pre-show.
Go back to one vote, one line people. It will save a lot of headaches.
Shannon is next. They must read the site (And who doesn’t) She’s dressed properly this time, but someone has told her to do Leanne Rimes ‘Can’t Fight the Moonlight’. Leanne is another one, who once she does a song almost no one else can do it.( unless they are exceptional.) Unfortunately Shannon isn’t – at least not tonight. I can’t even hear her first two lines .She’s also singing ahead of the band at one point.
J- Chastises her for not pacing again, and being out of breath.
Carnie- Shaky notes, but you have sparkle
JoJo – (Finally they found him!!) You’ll be back (Was he with Schwarzenegger or something?)
Harlemm follows, with George Michael’s “Careless Whispers”
Another girlie song. (GM’s not my Fave, ok?) More moves from the dance of the kung-fu weird. Only Harlemm could pull this stuff off. Anyone else would be thrown off the stage. He does somehow make it worth watching.
Carnie is the only one allowed to speak (again) saying next week she’s wearing a Planet Harlemm t-shirt.
Harlemm responds with god is good and thank you America.
The last few are looking more and more like the gals at Rose ceremony for the bachelor. There is panic in their eyes as they realize the odds are not that great.
Allyson made the cut for the next song. She does Madonna’s ‘Material Girl’. Again its Broadway tinged, sort of Liza Minnelli does Madonna. She’s a dancing non-sequitur, in that you know she’s trying. It just doesn’t fit.
JoJo talks first! - You are talented, but didn’t captivate the audience.
Carnie – strange song to pick
I’m floored when Justin gets his chance over Lauren. Lauren is sent off stage. The audience couldn’t get over last weeks poor showing, so Buh Bye.
Justin performs his usual original rap, called ‘No More’. He should have called it no music, since he forgot the band was even there until about halfway through the song. It’s really bad.
Johnny says he sees the potential (You know it’s bad when they use the P word) He adds, “You were off the beat”. (He was ‘off’ the entire band Johnny)
Carnie says he has Passion and she thought he was great. (Too much early childhood Beachboys Carnie)
Justin takes this opportunity to look more upset, and mad than he has a right to be. Waaaaay too early for the rapper diva routine kid.
Moy is the tenth and last picked. When it was Moy and Gary for the last two, you knew Gary was going. I’m sure he lost a lot of votes simply for the attitude.
Moy does Janet Jackson’s ‘Black Cat’. After last weeks Janet song gone bad by Jamieson, I’m edgy. Moy really does the song proud however. The wardrobe folks must like her best, as it’s the second week she’s had the best outfit. She’s very comfy and unafraid on stage. She ends in a one-arm pushup.
JoJo speaks for only the fourth time. He says she blows Hot & Cold with her performances. He said he was worried, but she was strong this week and adds, “Moy’s back.”
Carnie says she’s “in her element”, and thinks she should do ‘funky’ all the time.
Johnny just wants to see JoJo do the one arm pushup. Who knew he was funny?
Next week they lose two more. I’m going to watch. I really enjoyed this show, as opposed to having to watch it for the caps. BUT- I also have to add there was not one performance that blew me away. Alex kinda creeped me out, he was so Frankie like at times.
Don’t hide JoJo please.
* Because of some newbies bombarding me with what they see as the facts, this recap is for entertainment purposes only. (As are all FORTcaps) If you dress like a ho, have bad hair, sing off key, or look like a total fool, I WILL call you out.
Should you wish a recrap of the vanilla verbatim kind, run screaming now to the NBC website and don’t look back - EVER.
I may not be kind to your buddy, cousin, best friends’ sister, or the bag boy at the market who made it into the competition. And no, I don’t really care how long you’ve known them. What matters to me is the hour they are on TV and what they present to us, the viewers.
E-Mail bombs or bonbons to email@example.com