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Thread: Epsiode 7/6: "Throwing It Back In The Bitches Face"

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    Staying Afloat speedbump's Avatar
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    Epsiode 7/6: "Throwing It Back In The Bitches Face"

    Don’t you just love how the opening theme song attempts to make this show appear so Ivy League? As if the Stones suddenly add street cred. Meanwhile, I’m giggling because my inner monologue is playing RuPaul’s You Better Work. This show is quickly becoming the Pręt-a-Porter of reality television…and I’m along for the ride!

    There can never be a nice and relaxing night after an elimination. No Yanni, no lavender scented bath oils and now with Tommy gone, no flamboyant finger snaps and a “you go girl.” No, it’s the same old routine with the bitter beyotches Shauna and Deanna mumbling and grumbling. Yes, since they didn’t receive the recognition, there’s no sense in being happy. Who better than to take their sore sport attitude out on than Liz. Now I’ll admit Liz isn’t exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer but her dress design did win the last style-off. I was amused as she held her own, however. Going up against those two is like going up against Goose and Maverick in a sand pit volleyball game.

    Lea - ving…On A Trainwreck
    After the sassy pillow fighting and flimsy, naughty negligee wrestling was over,…er…oops, wrong movie. *clears throat, begin English brogue accent* The next day the gang assembled at Teterboro airport to meet with the big kahuna himself. It will be another clothing design competition and an interesting one I might add. One team will be flying off to Ft. Worth, Texas while another team will fly to Albuquerque, New Mexico. They will have to “execute” two outfits per team One for the men, another for the women. *end brogue accent, take sip of brandy*

    The outfits will have to be fashionable and reflect western Americana. Sound simple enough? Nah, ah, ah…not so fast my little Mizrahi’s. Half of each team will stay back in NYC and will design the outfits based on the research and ideas the traveling teams give them over the phone.

    Deanna and Princess are the team chooser’s for this round and Deanna will be going to Texas and Princess to New Mexico. The pick their crew as follows:

    Deanna*
    Shauna
    Wes*
    Chris
    Jessica
    Jeff *

    Princess
    Felix*
    James
    Rob W.
    Liz*
    Julie*

    *denotes who will be traveling to the west

    All My Ex’s Live In Texas
    The Texas team makes a stop at the local stock yards to see the Fort Worth Cowgirl Chicks, a fun and sexy group of women horse riders. The gals make sure to emphasize a good pair of jeans is what’s needed, i.e., spray-painted on. A nice huge belt buckle, ten gallon hat and a southern sexy drawl are what’s needed to showcase their area of assignment.

    The Albuquerque team heads to Hidden Mountain to take a look at some Native American garb. Liz admires the extensive detail and the pretty colors. One Indian mentions it took four years to hand bead his shawl. The gang was treated to a sacred dance and this project seems to be mellowing out Liz. I’m secretly rooting for her but apparently the other’s are not. Princess begins to mock Liz over the phone causing the NYC crew to break in to hysterics.

    The Texas team decides to do a little shopping of their own, for themselves or the competition it’s anybody’s guess. Deanna gives the NYC crew a call and gabs on for days with her bitch Shauna. Good ole Jeff sits there like a well trained puppy waiting to get on the phone and pretend he’s part of the team but no such luck. Instead, Jeff calls around to get a denim expert and hopes this will make him, not break him.

    The Denim Cobbler and His Elves
    As the away teams arrive back to the city, the home teams are already at the SoHo cutting room. Princess is already putting together the main body of the female’s dress and James is struggling with the men’s shirt. When the away team arrives they dump an assload of beads and jewelry which makes Princess a little nervous that it will be too authentic and not current and trendy.

    Meanwhile, Jeff scores big time with Walter the denim expert. Jeff and Felix had met Walter at a coffee shop and asked if he could produce a pair of denim and leather jeans in a short amount of time. Walter said “no problem” and went back to his shop where he and his elves knocked out a pair of jeans in no time flat. Jeff was on a rocky mountain high and paid Walter $500 dollars for his work which is a paltry sum for that kind of production. Jeff thought it was a steal…until they get back to the cutting room (where Shauna is sleeping on the floor) and find out that the group only has fifty bones left to pay the seamstress with. Apparently Jeff was put in charge of budgeting so Shauna quickly washes her hands of any wrongdoing leaving Jeff exposed to a possible walk on the runway. I don’t know why but I really can’t stand Shauna this week. Maybe it’s her gray teeth, her laziness and elitist attitude or the fact that she reminds me of the bitter sister in Jerry Maguire, but she drives me up the wall.

    Wampum Your Ass Outta Here
    The deadline comes and go, which by the way, Jeff royally screwed up by not showing up back to the cutting room on time with a denim jacket, therefore disqualifying that piece of clothing from the competition. Surely this means that Jeff will play whipping boy for the team and he will be sent home. I can already see the haze gray on Shauna’s teeth gleaming when Jeff takes the runway. But wait my faithful reality tv prognosticators, we all know that’s not how it works…

    The New Mexico team shows their work and it’s not too shabby if you like walking around with a blanket on your body. Yeesh, sixteen hundred dollars and all they could come up with was a multicolored blankie and some polyester scraps? Poor Liz looked like a folded napkin you’d find at your local Tex-Mex watering hole. I wasn’t sure if she was auditioning for Pocahontas or waiting in line for food stamps.

    Mr. H eyes over the clothes and comments on the denim. Jeff makes sure that Tommy knows it was he who found the denim specialist. Not wanting to capitalize on a good thing, Shauna chimes in that Jeff blew all the money on Walter and had forty dollars left for the seamstress. Wait, a few minutes ago they had fifty dollars. Perhaps there’s a fix in? While Shauna attempts to deflate Jeff, Jeff reminds her that Walter was the one who cut the patterns for everything. Tommy is happy that Jeff took a chance and it’s absolutely priceless seeing the crap eating grin on Shauna’s face turn to a scowl. The Texas team wins and Jeff is saved by the fashion gods once again.

    It’s beginning to turn into a mud wrestling fest in the Style Pit for Liz, Princess and Julie. Tommy is concerned that Princess that has been to the pit too many times. Liz has communication issues and Julie has…what does she have? Julie lacks the scope of leadership and lacks the design skills that Tommy is looking for. Julie is taking the runway. She is out of style. No loss there. It’s all filler for another couple of weeks anyways.

    Next week the gang opens their own clothing store and a game of nude flag football results in one member deserting their team. Until next week, stay tuned, stay groovy and stay in style…


    Like leather? Me too! Email me your favorite fetishdesign at: speedbump@fansofrealitytv.com
    You got to cry without weeping. Talk without speaking. Scream without raising your voice.- U2

  2. #2
    Cy Young 2010 Mariner's Avatar
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    Great job Speedy! I didn't get to watch because I was recapping Beauty and the Geek but now I feel like I did see the episode. I am with you on the Deanna/Shauna hate train.

  3. #3
    When I'm 64 William13's Avatar
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    Since my first exposure to Shauna was seeing her moan at the beginning of the 2nd episode and saying that she wanted to quit, Shauna has not been one of my favourite tv characters either. Maybe that's why my the line I liked best in your recaps was:
    Tommy is happy that Jeff took a chance and it’s absolutely priceless seeing the crap eating grin on Shauna’s face turn to a scowl.
    I also like this part:
    Poor Liz looked like a folded napkin you’d find at your local Tex-Mex watering hole. I wasn’t sure if she was auditioning for Pocahontas or waiting in line for food stamps.
    Thanks for the amusing recap.

  4. #4
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    That's hilarious. Liz is such a beautiful girl, but she really looked like she was waiting in line to audition for the role of Pochohontis. Great recap speedy. definitely filler for the next couple weeks.I don't think the show is gonna get good until there is less people (hence getting rid of the evil step sisters)

  5. #5
    FORT Biscuit VeronicaBelle27's Avatar
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    Thanks for the recap speedbump! I missed the episode, due to the network's negligence in telling us nice folks that are watching when the show would be on. Now I feel like I've seen it! Thanks again.
    Could does not mean should

  6. #6
    FORT Fogey
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    [QUOTE=speedbump]Julie is taking the runway. She is out of style. No loss there. It’s all filler for another couple of weeks anyways.

    I agree. There is some dead weight that will be dropped before we start getting to the real competition.

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