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Thread: Rest In Peace.

  1. #661
    FORT Fogey
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    I am sorry I think people who commit suicide are selfish. They may end their pain, but they force their loved ones to endure it along with their own for their whole lives. Marie will never ever get over it. She will move on the best she can, but it will be with her forever. I hope they RIP, but the ones I am saddened for are their friends and families period.

  2. #662
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    While suicide is indeed a selfish act, I don't think those of us who have never suffered from a deep intense depression can even begin to understand. While I have never struggled with clinical depression I know some who have and these folks are very inwardly focused (one could even argue, intensely selfish in their perspective) and seemingly have lost the ability to be anything else. Their perspective becomes so skewed. I don't think this is something that anyone would choose, however, it seems that once a person becomes deeply depressed many have serious issues finding and taking the meds that would help with the chemical imbalance. Too often they convince themselves they either don't need the meds, or they aren't helping. I don't believe that meds alone solve the problems, but I do believe that those who are depressed to this degree really don't have the perspective to change the other issues without addressing the chemical issues. I just think that, having never experienced this kind of pit, I can't judge. I don't think it's right, but I certainly have never walked in their shoes. I can't imagine how bad things must seem inside their heads that this appears to be the best solution.

  3. #663
    FORT Fogey norealityhere's Avatar
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    Having had suicide amongst my family and knowing others who've had it, I do agree that it's selfish. However, I totally understand that some people cannot deal with depression. Some have chemical depression, etc. but whatever the cause, it is devastating for them and my heart goes out to them.
    Please keep in mind the majority of suicides do try to reach out / cry out.
    We need to watch out for the signs as, very often, they are there. And, if we can reach them / help them in time, it's a wonderful thing.
    To Thine Own Self Be True

  4. #664
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    "Suicide is selfish," is constantly tossed about as if that recrimination is supposed to somehow right a wrong, but it means nothing to a dead person. If a suicidal person was capable of truly processing the concept of selfishness at that moment before the act, he/she might not proceed.
    The sad aspect is that at that last moment in the person's life the natural progression of thought and most likely only thought is that to end it all seems the correct thing to do.
    Take my advice. I am not using it.

  5. #665
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    I am undecided if suicide is selfish or not. Yes, they do leave their family members greiving for the rest of their life but those who do commit suicide are not thinking about their families when they take their own life. They are thinking about ending their pain. My brother commited suicide, my best friend did also and I really think that they weren't in their right mind because if they were, they would not have left their families knowing the hurt that they would cause.

    I had suicidal thoughts years and years ago and for me the only thing I thought of was ending my life because I felt like my clinical depression was a burden on my family more then it was on me. I would see the pain in their eyes when there was nothing they could do for me except to be there with me. So in my case, I wanted to end it so I didn't have to put my family through my depression with me if that makes sense. Do I think it is selfish? I don't know but I try to look at suicide from a loved ones view and the view of a person contemplating suicide.

    In my brothers case, he had an accident a week before. His atopsy showed that some gland in the back of his head was hit hard in that accident and that the gland or whatever it is called, if it hard, can cause hallucinations, anger etc. I really don't think he would have killed himself if he was in his right mind. He loved his family and he was agains't suicide. He used to get mad at a co worker saying he wanted to kill himself and my brother kept saying to him...how could you do that to your family, your children especially. 6 yrs later and my brother did the same thing

  6. #666
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    Quote Originally Posted by NCLurker;3842934;
    While suicide is indeed a selfish act, I don't think those of us who have never suffered from a deep intense depression can even begin to understand. While I have never struggled with clinical depression I know some who have and these folks are very inwardly focused (one could even argue, intensely selfish in their perspective) and seemingly have lost the ability to be anything else. Their perspective becomes so skewed. I don't think this is something that anyone would choose, however, it seems that once a person becomes deeply depressed many have serious issues finding and taking the meds that would help with the chemical imbalance. Too often they convince themselves they either don't need the meds, or they aren't helping. I don't believe that meds alone solve the problems, but I do believe that those who are depressed to this degree really don't have the perspective to change the other issues without addressing the chemical issues. I just think that, having never experienced this kind of pit, I can't judge. I don't think it's right, but I certainly have never walked in their shoes. I can't imagine how bad things must seem inside their heads that this appears to be the best solution.
    I have suffered from clinical depression for years, and am medicating for it. It's debilitating and unless someone has actually been there, there's no way to describe how this disease overtakes you.
    “No matter how dark the moment, love and hope are always possible.” George Chakiris

    Believe nothing that you hear and only half of what you see. :nono

  7. #667
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    Quote Originally Posted by anders332;3847516;
    I have suffered from clinical depression for years, and am medicating for it. It's debilitating and unless someone has actually been there, there's no way to describe how this disease overtakes you.
    You are absolutely correct. And it often can take years to find the right medication. Most anti-depressants take a few weeks to start working. I was on at least 8 different ones before we finally found one that works very well and what works for me didn't work for a friend of mine and vice versa.
    But it took several years of trial and error to find the right one. Those weren't very pleasant years either. For me or my family. And I have often thought how nice it would be to not suffer anymore. BUT I could never do that to myself or my family. I used to just wish to go to sleep at night and not wake up. But that's as far as I got with it. But with the right meds and therapy I am SO very much better today and can handle things a lot easier.
    But I was diagnosed about 27 years ago when depression still carried a stigma and no one ever talked about it. Now everyone seems to be taking an anti-depressant and will casually toss that out in conversation.
    But at it's worst it was the most horrible feeling in the entire world. I hope I never go back there again.
    Que me amat, amet et canem meum
    (Who loves me will love my dog also)

  8. #668
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    Depression also runs quite deeply within my family, and especially with the men on my father's side. My grandfather committed suicide the day after my 9th birthday which was 27 years ago. I have been through so many different emotions concerning his death over the years. I have been grateful for the time I had with him, sad for not understanding his death, and angry with him that he chose to miss out on so many important events in my life and the rest of our family's. He did not leave a note or any kind of message about why he killed himself, which made it even more difficult. I watched my grandmother live all of these years without knowing, and it broke my heart for her.
    We do know, now, that beyond his severe diabetes and depression, that he had recently been diagnosed with cancer, and had some other issues. But the truly difficult part was the not knowing. I expressed frustration to my mother many times and told her how selfish I thought he was. My mother, (who is divorced from my father and had not seen my grandfather much before his death), has helped me to deal with this. She has told me time and again how much my grandfather loved us all and that he could not have been in his right mind. She thinks that he was not intentionally selfish, and that he was trying to save us from the suffering.
    My grandmother died 2 months ago at the age of 86. She had her birthday three days before her death while she was in the Hospice Ward. Our entire family had the privilege of being with her, and as hard as it was to watch her suffering, I am so grateful that we had this last chance with her. I wish my grandfather had known how much he was loved and that we wanted to be there for him as well.

  9. #669
    Kiz
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    I just heard on the news that Cory Haim (age 38) died. The death is said to be accidental. No further information was given. (added - possible drug overdose).
    You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style. ~Humbert

  10. #670
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    Re: Rest In Peace.

    Actor Corey Haim dead at 38, overdose suspected: reports

    Eighties teen idol Corey Haim died Wednesday morning of an apparent drug overdose, according to Los Angeles police.

    The Canadian-born actor, who starred in "The Lost Boys" but was probably best known for his roles with fellow actor Corey Feldman, was 38.

    He was found unresponsive at his Oakwood apartment around 3:30 a.m.,according to KTLA-TV. His mother was at the apartment at the time of his death.

    The actor, who has struggled with drug addiction, was pronounced dead at Providence St. Joseph's Medical Center in Burbank.

    Police were called to the hospital just before 4 a.m. to investigate his death.

    Police sources told CBS Haim's death appeared accidental. Haim has been in and out of rehab and starred in a reality show with Feldman in 2007 called "The Two Coreys."

    He talked about his struggle with drugs - specificially prescription drugs.

    "I started on the downers which were a hell of a lot better than the uppers because I was a nervous wreck. But one led to two, two led to four, four led to eight, until at the end it was about 85 a day - the doctors could not believe I was taking that much," he told a reporter in 2007.

    "And that was just the Valium - I'm not talking about the other pills I went through."

    Haim's official website was last updated on Jan. 18 and promotes his upcoming film, a thriller titled "American Sunset

    Read more: Actor Corey Haim dead at 38, overdose suspected: reports

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