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Thread: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

  1. #8011
    Live-Love-Laugh Fanny Mare's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Quote Originally Posted by Eastcoastmom View Post
    Wow, Steve Martin becomes a first-time dad at the age of 67. His 41 year-old wife gave birth in December and apparently the pregnancy was kept under wraps and no one knew about it (media wise). Congrats to him and to his wife. Steve Martin Becomes A Dad At 67 (Report) - Yahoo! News
    Oh good for him! I like him.
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  2. #8012
    Resident "tyrant" JavaJo's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Quote Originally Posted by captain View Post
    Everyone has a choice, but in domestic violence situations, the abuser has "beaten" the person down physically, verbally, and emotionally and seldom does the victim see any other choice but to stay. It takes time, but once the victim finds the courage, she/he is able to make the choice.
    As for the person doing the beating, I could care less what happens to him or her.
    This will end my soapbox......on to lighter things in life.
    But she's been away from him for four years! I'd think after that amount of time, he wouldn't have any hold over her. That's a long time to be free of someone, only to go running back. Especially when you don't need help making ends meet. And it's not like he's been a pillar of society in their time apart. If he had cleaned up his act, I could understand it, but he hasn't.
    I hate when the cops throw me in the back of the squad car ....like they didnít hear me call shotgun.
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  3. #8013
    Live-Love-Laugh Fanny Mare's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Quote Originally Posted by JavaJo View Post
    But she's been away from him for four years! I'd think after that amount of time, he wouldn't have any hold over her. That's a long time to be free of someone, only to go running back. Especially when you don't need help making ends meet. And it's not like he's been a pillar of society in their time apart. If he had cleaned up his act, I could understand it, but he hasn't.
    Did she ever really leave him. Did they maybe stay in contact when they were able. I don't follow them, but they were seen at the same function( different entrances) some time ago
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  4. #8014
    Bloomin' FoRT Fanatic! ness's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Quote Originally Posted by prhoshay View Post
    The mind control that goes on in domestic violence is hard to understand, but exists like you would not believe. Just because some people are able to summon up the spine to strike back and leave has nothing to do with the people who can't. In some people, this is a learned behavior that they have grown up with. I knew a guy who actually said that hitting you is how some people show you that they love you....whoa....that has been many years ago, and I have never forgotten his words. That didn't click with any part of his personality that I had come to know; he seemed pretty sane, otherwise.

    It's amazing how some people can get inside your head and start to unravel you....and it's not just about the financial aspect. There are the people who decide to try to stick it out because they don't want to be alone; there are the people who think that they can save the abuser and make them better. There are the "But, I love him/her." And on, and on, and on.

    I don't think these people need to judged as being inferior, but there is a definite glitch in their mental processes somewhere. There is a definite problem and stranglehold at work, here. "But he said he'd kill himself/herself if I left!" Tell him you'll miss him/her, but you'll see them in the next life; as long as they don't try to take you or other people with them, it's all good and a blessing in disguise.

    It's a very complex situation.
    Yeah, shay, it IS.

    Mind control in domestic situations? SURE it exists. If it didn't, then I don't think we'd be discussing this subject now, or ever.

    And I'm TOTALLY right there with you when you point out that to compare those that stand up for themselves eventually and act on their own behalf --- versus those that never do --- is akin to comparing apples and oranges.

    EVERYBODY is different.

    Example: In my family, NO FEMALE WAS EVER RAISED OR TAUGHT TO TAKE/PUT UP WITH HAVING ANY MAN PUT HIS HANDS ON HER NEGATIVELY, FOR ANY REASON. One endured it for a long time (years, actually), then snapped and handled her business. She never had a hand laid on her after that. She's lucky that SOB didn't kill her before she snapped. The other, out of a clear blue sky, with NO prior warning, suddenly found herself pinned to a wall one day. Long story short, she unpinned herself and went to town. IMMEDIATELY. Right then, right when it happened, at the scene of the crime.

    Nope, it never happened again. And SHE never had a hand laid on/so much as raised to her by this idiot, ever again, either.

    What I found (and STILL find) fascinating is that two women that were raised and taught in the same manner by the same people could react SO differently when it came to being physically abused.

    Again, EVERYBODY, EVERY person --- even if they come from the same family and are raised in the same manner by the same people--- is different, obviously.

    About the quote from Roosevelt that resonated with me regarding this subject . . .

    I didn't perceive the word "inferior" as used in that quote to mean/say that the abused individual was being called out/judged by anyone outside of their situation as actually being inferior. The way I took it was that if YOU think or feel that you're "damaged goods", "less than" others, "inferior" (if you will) to others, that is an assessment YOU hold of yourself that can and DOES read to others OUTSIDE of you. And if that assessment of yourself is sensed/picked up on by equally-damaged, predatory people OUTSIDE of you, they'll take it, run with it, and use it (physically, mentally and emotionally, financially, etc.) to make THEMSELVES feel "superior" to you. "More than" you. "Better" than you.

    And as long as you hold a low, "inferior" view of yourself, these predators will keep abusing you left, right and center, because to do so is what THEY get off on. What THEY use to make THEMSELVES have some sense of worth. Some "power". An "identity". Oh, they most likely won't do it on their job, or in other social situations, because that mental game-playing and physical insanity will NOT be tolerated in those venues. But, at "home", in private, in a "relationship" setting, they'll ride the horse that's given to them.

    In an abuse situation, to me, the person being abused feels badly about him/herself, in some fashion. Inferior to whoever it is that they've hooked up with. And that just opens the door for the abuser, the "fun" starts, and continues until the one who's being abused gets a sense of self-worth and ends the foolishness.

    Or winds up dead.

    Just some thoughts, ideas and observations.
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  5. #8015
    Resident "tyrant" JavaJo's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Quote Originally Posted by Fanny Mare View Post
    Did she ever really leave him. Did they maybe stay in contact when they were able. I don't follow them, but they were seen at the same function( different entrances) some time ago
    I'm pretty sure they didn't have contact for a long time. She even said that in an interview I read at some point.
    I hate when the cops throw me in the back of the squad car ....like they didnít hear me call shotgun.
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  6. #8016
    FORT Fogey KatesMom's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Quote Originally Posted by AmyKay View Post
    From what I have read recently she has also pushed away her best friend (Katy Perry) to be with him. Katy was very upset when Rihanna kissed Chris at some awards show recently and she really tried to talk some sense into Rihanna but it didn't work. Its been said that they haven't talked for months because Katy doesn't want to see someone she loves make such a big mistake. I also read in the same article that Rihanna has told everyone that will listen that if he ever leaves her she will literally kill him. Sad, really.
    Am I the only one who thinks Rihanna might not be playing with a full deck? I have thought it for a long time - there is just something not right there.
    Florimel, ness, Dragonlady and 1 others like this.

  7. #8017
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    I am with you on that one! I don't know how sane you can be to return to somebody who has torn you up like that. It just makes no real sense.
    ness and Dragonlady like this.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

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  8. #8018
    FORT Fogey Miss Scarlet's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Quote Originally Posted by captain View Post
    I have to take exception about the comments on Rhianna.....most women in domestic violence go back to their abuser many times, before she finally says NO. They do understand that the violence is wrong but are still under the control of the abuser. I would never say a person deserves to be beaten. Domestic Violence is a very difficult situation to understand and even more difficult to leave.
    I agree that nobody but NOBODY deserves to be beaten or verbally abused either. Even if they continually go back to the abuser.
    I've been down that road, primarily verbal/mental moreso than physical. I knew full well that it was wrong & undeserved. Abused women aren't naive. But in the end it's a choice, made by the victim, to stay or go back. Why they do is only known to them.
    Personally the reason I stayed was fear that I couldn't take care of myself financially alone. This had been drilled into my brain for many years. I wasn't working so I was completely financially dependant.
    Supposedly I was incompetant, stupid, worthless & pathetic. I'd never be able to get a job & if I did they'd get rid of me as soon as they found out how stupid & incompetant I was. Even the legal system would give him the children because they'd see it too. Plus he could support them financially.

    The thing is, once I was out I was OUT. No second guessing, no regrets, no running to another man to bail me out. I wasn't about to trade one dependance for another.

    The thing I can't understand about Rhianna is that she doesn't have the dependance I had. She's an accomplished woman, well regarded in her field & well able to take care of & run her own life. She doesn't NEED him. Not in any stretch of the immagination.

    You can't help someone who doesn't want help or want to help themselves. Nothing can be done until SHE decides it needs to be done.
    Even if all h*** breaks loose again, & it will, I will still feel sympathy for her & hope for her realization that she needs to cut the jerk out of her life completely for her own safety & her own future. But until then we just sit back & wait.
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  9. #8019
    Signed, Sealed, Delivered prhoshay's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Lets just hope that they don't bring any children into this relationship.

    Miss Scarlett, sounds like somebody got into your head and seriously went to work on dismantling who you started out being. The great part is that you decided to define who you were, instead of letting HIM define whom you were and S-A-V-E-D Y-O-U-R-S-E-L-F.....in spite of his attempts! YOU GO, GIRL!!!! You are one to be admired!

    I always worry about women who decide to let a man convince them not to earn their own money.
    ness and Dragonlady like this.
    "...each affects the other, and the other affects the next, and the world is full of stories, but the stories are all one." - Mitch Albom, one helluva writer

    When you throw a rock into a pack of dogs, you know which one you hit by the one that yelps!

  10. #8020
    FORT Fogey Miss Scarlet's Avatar
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    Re: Miscellaneous Celebrity News

    Quote Originally Posted by prhoshay View Post
    I always worry about women who decide to let a man convince them not to earn their own money.
    Yeah, BIG mistake. I started out working, but the whole "you don't have to work" bit sounded so good. Plus darned near every woman would like to be able to stay home & raise her own children. But there are prices for everything. Mine was costly in many ways. Starting over jobwise from nothing is rotten.

    If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
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