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Thread: Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes

  1. #961
    FORT Fogey misskitty's Avatar
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    I wonder if Katie took the pregnancy test on the messed up internet things thread, who would show up as the Baby's father?
    http://www.thepregnancytester.com/

    Somehow, I believe that the baby is Tom's. And he does have sex with women. Not that he doesn't also have sex with men. Why on earth would a smart woman like Nicole Kidman stick around with him for so long? And not divorce HIM? And Penelope Cruz? Just doesn't make sense.

    I think he is the baby's Daddy, just not a straight Daddy. Did I already say this? Anyone agree?
    Live simply ~ Love generously~ Care deeply~ Speak kindly

  2. #962
    FORT Fogey psucashcow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by misskitty View Post
    I wonder if Katie took the pregnancy test on the messed up internet things thread, who would show up as the Baby's father?
    http://www.thepregnancytester.com/

    Somehow, I believe that the baby is Tom's. And he does have sex with women. Not that he doesn't also have sex with men. Why on earth would a smart woman like Nicole Kidman stick around with him for so long? And not divorce HIM? And Penelope Cruz? Just doesn't make sense.

    I think he is the baby's Daddy, just not a straight Daddy. Did I already say this? Anyone agree?
    I'm not sure in retrospect whether Penelope Cruz wasn't just using Tom for her own career advancement goals. Of course if he introduced her to the joys of Scientology and she split, that could have helped. I believe that everything that Cruise does is based on his interests alone, split with wife 2 before she can get a handle on some of his bucks. Don't marry Katie before he can get her to sign a very controlling prenup...I can only hope that MI 3 tanks BIGTIME and his asking price for movies plummets to somewhere in the B List Celebrity range
    Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day---Harry S. Truman

  3. #963
    FORT Fogey Leftcoaster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maveno View Post
    Did anyone catch MAD TV this past weekend? Hmm..I'm pretty sure it was Mad Tv
    Yep, it was MadTv, and I got a kick out of it as well. I saw some side glances, but when she came back to the accepted position after veering off from time to time I got the impression of her cultist programming kicking in like a dose of time released thorazine.

    You're take is the correct one though. Her pleading repeatedly and pathetically for help prior to being dragged away by her keepers at the end of the skit portrays her as fully aware of her status as captive incubator.

    Funny nevertheless. I liked her attempted description of how she got pregnant, referring to a clean room with attendants I didn't retain her description of, but her saying she was reminded of Rosemary's Baby fills in some of the visual blanks.

  4. #964
    FORT Fogey canadian_angel's Avatar
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    I swear the any minute now is just a way to get more publicicty for Tom going into MI3 opening. It is May 5th,

    So my guess, baby cruise will be born 2 weeks before it opens. Enough to generate buzz, but still enough for cruise to premiere MI3, possibly with Katie and baby.

    That's my cynical take.

  5. #965
    FORT Fogey misskitty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by psucashcow View Post
    I'm not sure in retrospect whether Penelope Cruz wasn't just using Tom for her own career advancement goals. Of course if he introduced her to the joys of Scientology and she split, that could have helped...
    I believe that Cruz is a devout Catholic and his Scientology pressure and non-acceptance of her religion is what caused the downfall.

    This in about Katie:

    Katie Holmes Tries to Induce Labour

    Katie Holmes is rumoured to be bingeing on spicy Indian food in order to induce her labour.

    Daddy-to-be Tom Cruise, is reportedly serving up a storm of hot curries to help the process along. "Tom is convinced he can get the baby to pop out sooner if he feeds her spicy dishes," a source told Britain's Daily Star.

    Cruise was on German TV promoting his film 'Mission: Impossible III' when he informed the interviewer that "Katie could be having our baby at any minute."

    The 'War of the Worlds' star allegedly had two pilots waiting at the airport in case he had to run home. "If Katie calls, I'm gone," said Cruise.

    This is the first child for 27-year-old Holmes, who has apparently agreed to follow Scientology's austere codes of natural (as in no painkillers) and silent childbirth.

    This means Holmes, nor anyone else in the room, is allowed to utter a word the reason is supposedly to not traumatize the baby with groans or screams.

    In order to help Holmes, the rules of labour have reportedly been printed on six-foot signs that will be hung in the delivery room. One of the signs that was photographed being delivered to TomKat's house read: "Be silent and make all physical movements slow and understandable.

    http://channels.aol.ca/entertainment...04101709990001
    Live simply ~ Love generously~ Care deeply~ Speak kindly

  6. #966
    Go Bruins! Qboots's Avatar
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    This means Holmes, nor anyone else in the room, is allowed to utter a word the reason is supposedly to not traumatize the baby with groans or screams.
    OK, can I have a show of hands from all FORT members who were traumatized
    at birth by the sound of their mother's voice? Anybody? No? That's what I thought.

    Besides, I'm sure that having your head all squished out of shape is traumatizing enough.
    "I'm telling you - it's a madhouse out there. I feel like Charlton Heston waking up in the field and seeing the chimp on top of the pony." ~ Dennis Miller

  7. #967
    Caged Maveno's Avatar
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    Ok, they can't traumatize the baby at birth with screams, moans, too fast of movements that aren't "understandable" to the baby.

    SO, for the rest of this kid's life, Katie and Tom are going to never raise their voices, make a move that the baby won't understand, and they'll always move slowwwwly around him/her, and never cry?
    Probably the ONLY TIME where kids wouldn't understand anything IS at child birth.. the rest of the kid's life is when all that "silent" crap should take place.

    I'm SO curious to know what EXACTLY Tom would do if a nurse hollers out, "Ohhhhh yeahhhh!!! Here comes the BABY! Come on! PUSH!!!" Smack her? Grab her by the hair and drag her out of the room to slap her around in the hall? Then sue her?
    Would they have the baby in therapy for the first 4 years of it's baby life? Give it up for adoption cuz it's now going to be "troubled"??

    What if a nurse sneezes?? A cough? Tom would probably smother the nurse to death...right there.

    Seriously. They're lucky I'm not one of the nurses...I'd be sooooo tempted. I'm not kidding. I'd probably do the sneezing fit thing.
    All things beautiful do not have to be full of color to be noticed; in
    life that which is unnoticed has the most power.

  8. #968
    JR.
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    Hey Q, that says nothing about flatulence

  9. #969
    FORTfruity applesauce's Avatar
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    I sure hope she doesn't have any complications and need a c-section. I can picture Tom telling her, "Be quiet now, you don't need a c-section, just push the baby out! Who cares if the baby won't fit/is turned sideways/is losing oxygen, you don't need any intervention. Just push with as little movement as possible! We don't want to cause any trauma." Or, "You can have the c-section but no spinal to ease the pain. Oh, and be quiet when they cut open your belly!" Geesh.

  10. #970
    Caged Maveno's Avatar
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    Ohhh JR!!! That's what I'd do... I'd fart!!!!!!!!!!!!
    All things beautiful do not have to be full of color to be noticed; in
    life that which is unnoticed has the most power.

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