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Thread: Celebrity Fit Club 5/27 Recap: 200 Pounds Lighter

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    Mixing Old Fashioneds PhoneGrrrl's Avatar
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    Celebrity Fit Club 5/27 Recap: 200 Pounds Lighter

    Meanwhile, back at the weigh-in…

    Last week’s episode ended with a tremendous amount of shouting back and forth between Harvey and Dustin. Kimberley was left waiting around to weigh in, and Tiffany’s cab had time to show up and take her away. She had to get out of the situation because, as she said, it took her back to her childhood, which clearly wasn’t a happy, fun time for her.

    Dustin finally exited the weigh-in room and continued his argument to the camera in some back bedroom of the weigh-in site. (Which leads me to the question that has been bothering me: where the heck are they when they do these weigh-ins? Is it just the Flavor of Love house, redecorated?) Dustin expresses amazement that he can cause so much anger just by speaking words. Why this amazes him is beyond me; has he never heard the expression “fighting words”? He says he wants to stick around to annoy the crap out of people, because he finds it so funny to do so. Ross, ever the team captain, tries to talk some sense into Dustin. Ross tells him that he likes to think that the world is against him, when, in fact, it’s really Dustin against the world. Ross wants to be on Dustin’s side, but finds it increasingly difficult to be supportive. Ross leaves it at that, and Dustin catches his ride.

    Because Dustin and Harvey’s fight was drug out so much, Kimberley did not get her chance to step on the scales before the last episode was up. Finally, after both Tiffany and Dustin left, Kimberley gets her chance to weigh in. Ant thanks the rest of the cast for sticking around, but doesn’t condemn Tiffany for leaving. Kimberley weighs in at 157, down three pounds from the 160 she was last time. She had a goal of four pounds, and is slightly disappointed at not meeting the goal. Stacy comments that Kimberley is the “bounce back girl,” bouncing back from both the weight loss disappointment from the last weigh-in and from all of the Dustin-created drama. Kimberley worries about what kind of image she projects to her young fans by not confronting Dustin about his nasty comments. Stacy reassures her that she is setting a fine example. We also get to see some footage of Kimberley filming a video for her new single, and how happy she is at being thinner for the video, since the camera adds weight.

    Chat time with Malibu Stacy

    A week after the huge fight and nasty weigh-in ceremony, the cast meets up with Stacy in Malibu to talk out the Dustin situation before the next Fit Club challenge. Stacy does not know what the future holds for Dustin’s participation—it is still up in the air whether or not he will come back. Festivus has come early for the Clubbers, as Stacy wants to give everyone a shot at airing their grievances about Dustin. Tiffany goes first and says that at every meeting, Dustin takes his level of nastiness to the next level. She has a hard time talking with him and being nice, even when he’s being pleasant, because she knows what kind of comments he’s made about her other cast mates. Warren G. just didn’t take to Dustin’s behavior, so he left the last weigh-in and has no regrets about having done so. Brat said that Dustin crossed the line when he made the comments about Kimberley; Cledus also couldn’t see why Dustin even had to make the comment at the porn convention about Kimberley. Maureen got disgusted with Dustin when he was making comments about how funny it is to see retarded people fall down; her brother is retarded and she has had to deal with a lifetime of nastiness directed toward her brother. Kimberley’s main issue—beyond the tacky porn stuff—is that Dustin has made it clear he was in the competition only to further his career, whereas the others are there to lose weight and take advantage of the training opportunities. Ross shares his quandary of trying to decide whether to keep encouraging Dustin to lose the weight and stay with the program for the sake of the team, to just try to keep the peace, or to let Dustin go. With the air cleared, it’s time to go to the challenge.

    Worst wedgie ever.

    After the Clubbers are done with their “therapy” session, Harvey meets them on a climbing and ropes course. The course is made up of three telephone poles made into an “H” shape. Harvey demonstrates the course, by climbing up one pole, walking across the horizontal pole, and, upon reaching the other side, jumping off and swinging on a rope out toward the ocean. Of course, he is in a harness, so there’s no risk of falling, and he makes it look fun and effortless.

    The Clubbers are all visibly nervous, but Maureen is quick to step up to the challenge. She makes it across and swings out big, and loves it. I love the fact that they’ve equipped each person with a tiny camera so we can see their reactions as the fly out on the rope. Warren G. is up next, and he only makes it to the top of the first pole before being lowered down. The guy freaks out just where I would—the thought of crossing the transverse pole is just too much for him. Ross goes next, and has no problem, aside from getting the worst wedgie ever on his flight out toward the ocean. Tiffany and Kimberley also have no problem with the course. Cledus, who we all know has phobias seven ways from Sunday, actually does it as well, although he takes his time with it. Brat tries the course, but backs down the first pole after almost reaching the transverse bar. Warren G. doesn’t want to be in the same wimpy category as Brat and wants to meet Harvey’s challenge so he has a second go at it. He makes it across to the point where he’d jump off, but one of his safety lines gets caught on the platform. The poor guy is already kind of freaked out and then he’s just left dangling. It’s no wonder that when they finally get him free, he swings out all cramped up in the fetal position. Cledus laughs so hard, he actually, physically rolls on the floor laughing, like a smiley come to life.

    The most pleasant weigh-in ceremony ever.

    It is Day 72 of the Fit Club, and it’s time to weigh in. Dustin is still absent, as is Dr. Ian. Dr. Ian, however, is not at a porn convention or selling tee shirts to save his house; his wife has just had a baby, so he’s indoctrinating it in healthy eating ways. We are left with just Harvey and Stacy on the panel.

    First up is Warren G.; he weighed 196 pounds last time, and had a two-pound loss goal, which he precisely met. He is only six pounds away from his overall goal weight. Stacy asked him about the physical challenge the day before, noting that he was out of his comfort zone. He said Harvey made it look so easy, but it was absolutely no joke flying out toward the ocean. Harvey gives him a goal of three more pounds to lose for the next weigh-in.

    Tiffany steps up next; she was supposed to reach 133, but only got down three pounds to 134. Tiffany is finally dressing better in clothes that fit and we can really see she is slimming down. Stacy asks her about the shouting session at the last weigh-in, and Tiffany again alludes to a troubled childhood and says that screaming matches are not allowed in her home because she wants to be sure to break the pattern of trouble home life with her 14 year old son. Wait, Tiffany has a 14 year old son?

    Mo, labeled the gold standard for weight loss, came up next. She dropped one pound—the goal she set for herself—and is down to 121. The woman has lost 29 pounds in toto, and is down 19.3% of her body weight. Stacy asks her how she dealt with the fall-out after the last weigh-in, and Maureen cops to spending the next whole day in bed but then decided she was going to snap out of it and not let Dustin ruin her week. Then, in an effort to court the 40+ year old male audience, we are treated to footage of Maureen at the latest weird work out: professional pillow fighting. Apparently, pillow fighting as a competitive sport has caught on in LA, and, much like roller derby before it, been used in some sort of third wave feminist way of reclaiming women’s power over men. Ennnieway, the pillow fighter girl shows Mo how to throw down in the arena, and she takes to it all very quickly. On the plus side, pillow fighting apparently burns up to 750 calories per hour, so maybe I’ll add that to my workout. Mo gets to set her own goal again, and pledges three pounds for the next weigh-in.

    Brat, who knocked it out of the park last week, is up next. She was supposed to lose two pounds, but it turns out she gained one, and is up to 154. She says she didn’t work out as much over the past week, but she did try to stick to the diet. Stacy asks Brat about not being able to complete the ropes course and Harvey invites her back to the course, but Brat is adamant that she’d never try it again. Harvey gives her a five pound goal.

    The other power flab loser, Ross, is up next. He was 182 and is down to 181. He set his own goal of two pounds, so he’s slightly disappointed, but he is down 33 pounds overall, or 15.4% of his total body weight. Stacy brings up Dustin’s absence—after all, it’s Ross’s team who is down a player. Ross should go into diplomacy if the television personality thing doesn’t pan out; he says he is disappointed in losing a team member and worries about what it’ll do to the team overall, but does not that things are “lighter” without him. Harvey doesn’t pull any punches, and gets Ross to agree with his assessment that Dustin is a waste of sperm. Clearly Harvey isn’t an adherent to the famous Monty Python song. Ross sets his own goal of a three pound loss for the next meeting.

    With Dustin gone, there’s got to be a little drama, and Cledus brings it, but sans the personal attacks. He was down to 185 and had a one pound goal, but he didn’t lose anything. He blames not losing more weight on the fact that he’s now eating three meals a day and eating different meals. He blames Stacy for making him give up the chicken and broccoli he was accustomed to, and now worries he is going to spin out of control again. Stacy says Cledus needs to confront his fear of chaos, but he frantically says he will spiral into chaos because he didn’t lose weight. Harvey tries to calm him down, saying that he’s already lost a lot of weight, and there will be a point where his loss with plateau for a bit. Harvey gives him a two pound goal for the next ceremony.

    Lastly, Kimberley weighs in. She lost her two pounds that she was supposed to, and is down to 155. Kimberley got to deliver the toys and supplies to the kids that they won in the dance competition, and VH1 followed her to one of the charities to see her handing out stuff; it was a lovely thing to do, but not very exciting. Stacy also asks her about her threat to leave the show; Kimberley says the fact that her cast mates not only supported her but also voiced their own issues with Dustin made her want to stay, because the other six were such a unified front in her corner. Harvey gives her a four pound goal.

    Out on the big scales, the Athletes (Mo, Ro, and Tiffany) have lost 12.6% overall, and the Regulators (Cledus, Brat, Warren, and Kimberley) have lost 12.1% body weight overall, so the Athletes are still ahead, but no one knows what the future will bring if Dustin comes back.

    Like a bad penny….

    Of course, the hour can’t conclude without some new footage of Dustin. The producers caught up with him for an interview in the back of a limo. He apparently has been hanging out in a fortune cookie factory, and spouts such bon mots as: “I eat what I eat;” “The greatest victory is the victory of self;” “Dogs are rewarded treats – call them prizes;” “Life without conflict is Nirvana, which is what man has been searching for since the dawn of time;” and “He who speaks does not know; he who knows does not speak” I think I need some of what he’s smoking to understand that mess.

    As it turns out, the previews show that Dustin will be back, at least long enough to make a fool of himself on some kind of motorbike. That show is two weeks away, so you all have time to purge your system of all things Dustin-related and, instead, wonder why Mr. Belding was hanging out with Playboy models in Vegas.

    Wanna pillow fight? PM me!

  2. #2
    Read The Clue Bearcata's Avatar
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    Re: Celebrity Fit Club 5/27 Recap: 200 Pounds Lighter

    Hey PhoneGrrrl I'll pillow fight you anytime as long as Ross and Harvey are there.
    "When life gives you lemons, squirt lemon juice in your enemy's eyes."

  3. #3
    From the corner of my eye Jewelsy's Avatar
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    Re: Celebrity Fit Club 5/27 Recap: 200 Pounds Lighter

    Great recap, PG.
    "Among the blind, the squinter rules." ~ Gerard Didier Erasmus

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