Welcome back to another action packed episode of Celebrity Apprentice! Tonight, we start out with some footage of the gang sitting around discussing Nadia’s dismissal. Piers teases Jennie for selling her idol down the river, and Jennie covers her face in embarrassment, and then laughs. I guess she’s not too broken up about it.
In the elevator heading back up to the suite, Nely sobs on Carol’s shoulder… er, on an area lower than her shoulder. So low that I think Gene Simmons is going to be disappointed that he was not in that elevator with them. Seeing these two women together makes me think that Carol is an Amazon or something, but she’s not. Nely is just super, super tiny.
In the suite, Omarosa declares that she’s glad Nadia is gone, and that Carol and Nely stayed, because they’re her BFFs in the house. She knows that they just need to find the right button to push so that Hydra comes tumbling down, and they’ll be able to take the next competition.
Wait… Vinny was on the Sopranos? Oh, now I get why he is so obsessed with Italian mob culture!
The next day the teams meet at the Hudson River, and Trump jokingly asks Vinny how many corpses he thinks are in the river. Oh, ha ha, Mr. Trump. Murder humor is the best! Vinny replies that he already ratted out on another show… The Sopranos! So, he’s going to stay quiet on this one. Now, I know The Sopranos was a huge, wonderful show and everything, but I’d like to say that I think it’s time for Vincent Pastore to celebrate the rest of his resume- the man appeared on Alf’s Big Hit Talk Show for Pete’s sake, and do we ever hear about that? No.
Moving on, Trump announces that since Hydra won the last task, and Gene was the Project Manager, a big fat donation is on its way to the Elizabeth Glazer Pediatric AIDS Foundation. Then, because Empresario is now two women short, Trump gives Gene the option to join that team and be the Project Manager for the next task. Gene accepts the invitation and announces that this was the role he was born to play- King of All Women.
Good luck pulling that crap with this bunch of harpies, Gene.
Trump brings out two executives from Kodak to discuss this week’s task. He announces that Kodak has gone digital, (really? You don’t say!), and is doing a fantastic job getting digital technology into the hands of the people. The teams are tasked with creating a Kodak mobile printing experience. They’ll be provided with a mobile bus, cameras and printers, and will be judged on branding, originality and the bottom line.
Isn’t Castro also called a benevolent dictator?
Over on team Empresario, Gene announces that he is a benevolent dictator, and the ladies kind of laugh. Well, the ladies except for Omarosa, who apparently knows what the term “benevolent dictator” means and is pissed about it. Gene goes on to say that he was named Project Manager, which means that he is in charge. Indeed, it does. He throws out a lot of business buzz words, (including “think outside the box,” which I am ashamed to say that I actually used at work the other day), and then decides that only two people should meet with the Kodak executives, and he should not be one of them. Oh, during this van ride, he also comes up with their branding initiative- “It’s a Kodak World.”
Hydra selects Tito Ortiz as their PM, and all the guys decide to meet with the Kodak executives to learn what they’re looking for. The execs state that they’re interested in presenting their affordable ink, and that’s what they’d like the whole marketing initiative to be based on. They want people to think about ink, and realize that Kodak offers affordable, premium ink. That’s what they say anyway. I wouldn’t know about that because I’m one of those people who don’t think about ink.
Gene sends Nely and Carol to the Kodak executives to represent Empresario, and it doesn’t go so well. The execs try to get their ideas across to the ladies, but Nely is more concerned with asking questions and making statements than with actually listening to what Kodak has to say. Nely leaves the meeting with the idea that Kodak is most interested in selling their printers and the home printing experience, and tells her team that the buzzwords they need to keep in mind are “experience,” “affordable,” and “bringing printing back at home again.”
Immediately, Gene declares that the Kodak execs are wrong, and they don’t know what Kodak is looking for. Wait, the Kodak execs don’t know what Kodak is looking for? Hmm. Gene says that he’s arrogant, but he has the expertise to back it up and he knows what Kodak wants. As he’s spouting off about his greatness, we see shots of Omarosa looking shocked and incredulous, and I don’t blame her. Wow- I never thought I’d write that sentence! Gene continues to say a bunch of crazy stuff, ending with “Dammit Gene, you are a powerful and attractive man.”
Kodak said knock you out!
For some reason, Hydra is actually working on a marketing plan that encompasses everything the Kodak execs said they were looking for. They must not know what Kodak really needs, like Gene does. Stephen is all hopped up on Red Bull, (and hopefully not illegal drugs), and is running around the room shouting nonsense until Piers reigns him in with his idea of marketing that Kodak has a “knock out punch.” Kodak is the biggest knock out merchant in the world (really? Has extensive research been done to determine this?), and Tito and Lennox can help show the consumers that “Kodak presents the ink revolution that is gonna knock you out.”
Team Empresario is working on decorating their mobile bus all fancy and pretty like. Actually, the ladies of Empresario are working on the bus. Gene is micro-managing and giving orders to everyone. Nely doesn’t mind that Gene is making the women do all the dirty work, because she feels like she’s the CEO to Gene’s Chairman. Omarosa does mind that Gene is making the women do all the dirty work, because she knows that they will do all the work, but Gene will take all the credit. Or the blame. Just sayin.’
Hydra is also working on their design with a group of graphic designers in the war room. Stephen has the great idea of taking a photo of Lennox and Tito “knocked out” next to a Kodak printer, and Piers has an even better idea to have the guys take their shirts off for the photo. Vinny doesn’t really want anything to do with this photo because it seems to him like it’s some sort of weird sex picture, but I have to disagree as it’s two boxers with a printer. Not a whole lot of sexiness there.
The guys pose for their picture on the conference table, and for some reason, Stephen is up on the table with them. When it’s all done and the picture has been taken, the three men jump off the table and accidentally tip it over. And everything that’s on the table. Like the laptop with all of the graphic design they’ve been working on for the last 8 hours and a full cup of coffee, (do you see where I’m going with this?). Coffee meets laptop, and everything disappears. Yikes!
Piers is very upset and blames Stephen for jumping off the table, but I think that they should have had the foresight to move at least the cup of coffee off the table before staging their little photo shoot. Piers whines about their bad luck, and I think they should bless their lucky stars that they are not on Gene’s team.
Sloppy presentation and not knowing the name of the product… both excellent ways to wow your client.
The next day Omarosa tries to make sure everyone on her team knows the name of the product they’re pushing. Gene thinks it’s called the All In One, but Omarosa informs him that it’s actually called the Easy Share. Gene doesn’t really care, because the women will be doing the balance of the work and he’ll be standing back to watch. He says that God created women, and it’s an insult to God’s creation to hide the beauty of what God wanted everyone to see. Oookay, that’s one way of getting out of work, I guess. Special guest judge Jim Cramer (host of Mad Money) shows up, and is doesn’t say much at all. According to Gene though, Jim was shocked by the professionalism and awesomeness that he saw from Empresario.
Hydra’s presentation is very, very sloppy. The men are upset because they know their marketing materials are very amateurish because of the coffee spill and fried laptop. They’ve actually hung paper signs on the front and back of the bus, and this is the first thing Jim Cramer comments on when he stops by. Trace grabs him and tells him he should buy stock in Kodak, because when he’s done telling the people of New York about the Kodak ink, their profits will skyrocket! Jim tells us that Hydra got the message about the ink, but their marketing is horrible, and their bus looks like a dumpster.
Ladies and gentlemen… presenting Jack Donaghy!
Over at Empresario’s bus, the Kodak executives show up and Gene takes them on a tour of his Kodak world (after he insists that the female exec take his arm). Omarosa is hoping that they somehow tap into Gene’s magic and pull out a victory on this task, but I don’t really care, because over on Hydra’s bus…
Alec Baldwin has showed up! Alec! Now, I figured we’d see some other Baldwin brothers randomly during this season, but I thought it would be Daniel or Billy. I never dreamed that we’d get to see Alec! Stephen corners his brother, and the deadpan exchange that follows is perfect, and exactly what I would expect to see from some Baldwin brothers:
Stephen: You know anybody that takes digital photos with a camera?
Alec: Some do, and some do not.
Stephen: Okay, how would you like to save those people 50% on their printing?
Alec: That sounds exciting to me.
Stephen: You know the cartridges they buy?
Alec: No, I… I don’t, but I can imagine.
Stephen- They’re very expensive.
Alec: I’m blown away, actually.
Alec: I need to sit down.
Alec says he would have bought some cartridges anyway, but he is so impressed with his little brother’s sales pitch that he ends up buying a few cartridges at $1000 each. The Kodak executives show up after Alec leaves (I’ll bet they were bummed!), and seem mildly impressed with Hydra’s operation.
Sometimes, sloppy doesn’t matter.
It’s Boardroom time! Trump starts off by asking Gene how it felt to lead the women. Gene replies that it was exhilarating and they connected immediately. Omarosa tattles and says this wasn’t the case, and she didn’t appreciate that Gene referred to himself as a benevolent dictator. Trump asks why Gene did not feel the need to meet with the Kodak executives, and Gene replies that he did not want to poison his mind by meeting with executives who had well defined points of views that may have differed with his.
Trump turns his attention to Hydra, and PM Tito says that yes the presentation was sloppy, but they had a mishap with some coffee, and they still did a great job getting their point across. Jim Cramer steps in and says that this task was all about repositioning a great American brand, and that although the women (and Gene) had a better presentation, the men had the message about the ink. And they made the most money, so the Hydra wins again!
It’s hard to be the smartest person in the world.
Trump sits down with Empresario and asks Gene what happened. Gene says that nothing went wrong- there was not one thing that the team could have done better. Unfortunately, the Kodak executives did not know what they wanted, and did not understand that Gene knew what they needed. He goes on and on about how he was not wrong and his team did not fail until Ivanka basically tells him to shut up, and that standing so firmly behind an idea that did not work will not get him any credit in the Boardroom. Ouch.
Trump tells the team that the execs did not care for Nely’s behavior during the meeting, and how she spoke too much and did not listen enough. He asks Carol what happened, and she is very diplomatic and says that she and Nely went in as a team, and failed as a team. Gene cuts in to tell her that she’s wrong, and they didn’t fail, and Trump points out that Gene keeps saying that, but Empresario were the clear losers in this task.
Trump goes around the room to play his favorite game of “Whom should I fire?” Jennie, Omarosa and Marilu pick Gene, Carol says it’s a toss up between her and Nely, and Nely says Jennie. What? Trump is as surprised as I am about this pick and makes Nely explain. She tells the group that Jennie has not stepped up as a leader and should go home. Trump points out in all fairness that Jennie was not the leader of this task, and that could be the reason why she didn’t lead. Trump tells Gene to pick two people to come back to the Boardroom with him, and he says he only wants one and chooses Omarosa. Trump is shocked again and asks why he didn’t choose Nely… the person the Kodak executives specifically named that they did not like. Trump makes Gene select another person, and this time he chooses Jennie. Once again Trump is shocked and does not know what to make of it.
Out in the hall, Omarosa comments that she is tired of being the cop-out default selection, and Gene replies that she’s hardly a victim. I think they both have valid points. When it’s time to face Trump again, Gene insists that Omarosa take his arm and they walk in like they’re the best of friends.
Trump lays it all out for Gene and asks him what he’s supposed to do when Gene would not bring people who actually deserved to get fired into the Boardroom with him. He chastises Gene for not giving him a choice, and then fires him. Just like that.
Tune in next week to see Piers and Stephen throw down! Dude- don’t mess with a Baldwin!