The show starts off as it usually starts; with screaming. Lots and lots of screaming. Why do people scream? I don’t understand. Are you that excited about being in the audience of Canada’s most popular, (read: only popular) summer show? Does the prospect of seeing Ben Mulroney or Jon Dore just work you up into such a frenzy that you’re unable to properly articulate your emotions? Or is it for the Idols themselves, barely celebrities at this point? At this point, no one is worthy of my screams. Well, that could change if Casey continues to escape the bottom three.
Tonight is Big Band night, complete with a 20 piece orchestra, led by Orin Isaacs. If that name sounds familiar, it’s because Orin used to be on the Mike Bullard show, another wildly successful Canadian show. And of course, when I say wildly successful, you understand that more than 200 people from across the country watched it.
Ben’s intros continue to get lamer as he introduces the judges as Canadian Idol’s very own Rat Pack. Of note, it’s Farley’s birthday today and as usual, he’s the best dressed member of the judging panel. Bear in mind, he sits next to Sass each week, so he could be dressed in his actual Birthday Suit and still be better dressed. After all, the woman is wearing a flower in her cleavage tonight.
Suzi leads off the night with Minnie The Moocher and has tarted right up, wearing a slinky dress that shows off her tattoos. She does a good job of getting the audience into it and her experience in front of a crowd pays off. Jake admires her swagger, Farley and Sass think she gave a great, fun performance and Zack congratulates her on a job well done.
Aaron follows with I Can’t Believe You’re In Love With Me, sporting a stylish fedora. For those of you that don’t understand what the judges mean when they say Aaron is too ‘theatrical’ well, Aaron spells it out for you with this performance, even showcasing the dance part of song and dance. Farley praises him for being who he is. Sass, for the first time is impressed. Zack says that the good news and bad news is the same; he’s fantastic and Jake agrees. Neither of them seem to think excelling in this genre is a good thing. You’re right, Aaron should have gone all punk rock on their asses.
Next is Melissa, with De-Lovely, who is very lovely tonight, minus the flower in her hair, which reminds me a bit too much of AI’s Jasmine. Sass thought Melissa sang well with great emotion. Zack says she’s a classic in any generation and crosses his fingers that Canadians didn’t miss what a great performance she gave. Jake and Farley are both glad Melissa has made it this far and the happy streak continues. Did the judges have a few celebratory cocktails before the show? This is a theme just begging to be mocked and everyone’s impressing the pants off the judges.
Josh has made friends with a hair dryer and takes to the stage with When I Fall In Love. Dressed in a bright white suit, like the Birthday Boy, Josh sings a much slower version of the song than most interpretations. Zack, uncharacteristically mellow, thanks Josh for his performance and says it’s a privilege to be part of the show. Someone’s doctor upped the Prozac. Jake agrees with the assessment, and says he felt like he was watching a 40’s Matinee Idol. Farley calls him soft and sweet, while Sass finds him dark and mysterious. Nonetheless, all judges are in agreement and the winning streak continues.
Less contestants means more Jon Dore. In keeping with the theme of the night, his bit is all about a cheesy detective, smitten by a mysterious dame; starring an unsuspecting Sass. Caught off guard, Sass refuses a dance and Jon’s attention turns to an equally unsuspecting Jake. So help me, God, I actually laughed. Either I’m getting older or Jon’s getting funnier.
Rex trades his white cap for a white fedora and selects Feeling Good and does a good job of infusing his personality while remaining true to the genre. Jake notices and says not only did he make it a rock song, he sang better than ever. Farley calls him a natural and Sass is impressed with his range. Zack wishes the show could be like Amazing Race and have a non-elimination week. Seriously, Zack is no Simon, but I don’t even recognize this guy.
Casey follows with I Could Write A Book. She looks like she’s fresh from playing dress up in her mother’s closet, but looks sophisticated, nonetheless. The lovefest apparently has come to an end, as none of the judges are all that taken with her. Farley thinks she played it safe, Sass says the genre isn’t right for her, Jake says it didn’t feel right to him and Zack thought one line was spectacular, but that it is what it is. Ah, there’s the Zack I know.
Closing off the night is Daryl, with What A Wonderful World. Remember last season when Jacob dressed up like Paul Anka? Well, that’s what Daryl did, except he did it accidentally. Daryl sings well, but not nearly well enough to save himself from ridicule from the cool kids, uh, the judges. Sass says it was like Pee Wee Herman and Jerry Lee Lewis singing Louis Armstrong. Ouch. Zack calls it Tiny Talent Time and insists Casey and Daryl are on a different level than everyone else. Well, that or the happy pills wore off precisely the moment Casey took to the stage. Jake can’t disagree and says all he can see is Richie Cunningham. Well, that certainly would make Daryl feel at least a little older. Farley sums up the critique, explaining that the point of the theme shows is to step up and Daryl failed to do that.
Sounds like some people need a nap.
Next Time: 7 become 6 and someone, likely not Casey, is sent packing