The Biggest Loser Recap 03/29/11 - Hoppin' Down The Redemption Trail
Keeping in mind it is the perogative of a woman to change her mind at a drop of a hat, not to mention fuzzy brain moments from a steady 3-month-long diet of lettuce, grilled chicken and boxing gloves, we are all set to forgive Green Teamer Kaylee for her dreadful attempt at manipulating the weigh-in last week. She weeps and promises she's learned her lesson, and Daddy Moses claims his daughter is just sick 'n' tired of the "gameplay". Or lack thereof, I suppose. All I can say is - damn good thing Russell Hantz doesn't need to lose a lot of weight.
This week, we find that 2 hours of show is indeed too much. Or, at least 16 minutes too much. Ali Sweeney rounds up the contestants in the gym and pointlessly runs some video of the Losers when they found out they had made the show. Amid all the tears, cheers, and gratuitous shots of wobbly belly fat, Ali interrupts to announce the entrance of the "12th team", who didn't make the show. Huh? Is that like the 5th Beatle? As it turns out, it's a mother-son duo who didn't get chosen for the show. Leann and Vance are from Utah and they haven't been overly successful with their weight loss, but if they can beat Kaylee's loss percentage - 25.32% - they can win a spot on the ranch. As we don't know these people from a hole in the ground and we can't possibly be expected to care about them, it's not even mildly interesting to see them falling far short of the mark. For the number lovers out there, Vance's start weight was 379, now at 349. He would have needed a 95-lb loss. Leann started at 315 and fared better, now at 270, but she required a 79-lb loss to beat Kaylee's percentage. So, it's back to Utah for them. Yawn.
The pop challenge this week has two members of each colored team carrying a board with a hole, balancing 2 balls on top. The balls are to be dropped in a basket some yards away. The first team to drop 10 balls wins a 1-minute advantage at the weekly challenge. The last team to finish gets booted off the ranch for a week, to an unknown location. Kaylee, who has found new life this week, scores some brownie points alongside teammate Austin for acing the challenge and winning the advantage. Red teammates Courtney and Jen are the losers, and as Justin left the previous week, the twosome are on their own.
As it turns out, the losers end up being the winners. Ali hands the Red girls "menus", which itemize food, training, and lifestyle options for their week off-campus. They are given a "budget" of $1,000 to choose their options. The girls opt to shop for their own groceries and cook their own food, get a gym membership, make phone calls home, get massages, and one restaurant meal. They do not opt to "buy" their trainer, Brett. Apparently his $200/day fee is too steep. Clearly they are unaware that real-life "celebrity" trainers can have a $200/hour fee. Ali frowns upon their dissing of Brett and reminds them that if they lose the weigh-in, being as there's only 2 of them, the one with the lowest percentage of weight loss will go home without a vote. Brett visits the girls before they leave, and they sheepishly admit they didn't purchase his services when given the chance. He's pissed but gives them some written instruction for workouts.
The ladies get some high-end digs in Ojai, CA, and enjoy a rather fabulous week while the other teams knuckle down with their respective trainers - in between a little schilling for Subway with some elementary school kids. Gotta make the corporate sponsors happy sometimes.
Speaking of. The week's challenge is an ad campaign for a new movie called Hop, which is some cutesy kiddie flick with animation and the alcoholic-y vocal stylings of Russell Brand. The TBL teams are going on a big-ass Easter Egg hunt in a field with 5,000 dyed eggs. Each team must collect 600 eggs in their team color (except the 2-person Red Team, which will collect 400). Each team that finishes gets to attend an advanced screening of Hop. With that kind of motivation, it's amazing anyone wants to hunt for eggs, unless of course they're scrambled with some nice fresh salsa and cheddar cheese on top. Alas, the only silver lining in the challenge is sparkly and golden - a single golden egg, looking very much like a kindergarten craft project, is hidden amongst the 5,000 other eggs. The egg has a prize inside (like KinderSurprise, outlawed in the U.S....but that's another thread in another forum). The contestants get busy, and Olivia turns up the golden egg. The dubious prize is the single vote at the weigh-in that week. The winning Green Team scores a trip to the world premiere of Hop. So they have to sit through it twice. Yet another dubious prize. Everyone finishes, so the teams troop off to the movie, where actor James Marsden makes a personal appearance and finds himself fending off Hannah's advances. I'm starting to understand better why she's the unmarried sister.
Weigh-in time, and Ali reminds us for the zillionth time that Olivia has the only vote, as long as the Blue Team doesn't lose the weigh-in. So without further ado:
Olivia, start weight 180, down to 176
Irene, start weight 173, down to 170
Moses, start weight 300, down to 293
14 lbs total, 2.14%
Ken, start weight 263, down to 257
Austin, start weight 272, down to 265
Kaylee, start weight 174, down to 169
18 lbs total, 2.54%
Jay, start weight 282, down to 276
Rulon, start weight 330, down to 325
Hannah, start weight 172, remains at 172
11 lbs total, 1.40%
Here we must interrupt for some Rulon drama. An aggrieved Jillian claims to have "been told by others" (which apparently means "viewed hidden video coverage") that Rulon's been eating on the sly. Jillian calls Rulon out, forcing a confession from the beefy wrestler that he's been snarfing down tortilla chips in his room at night. Where did he get chips 'n' dip at the health ranch? Maybe he put an innocently snacking cameraman in a headlock.
Courtney, start weight 234, down to 232
Jen, start weight 187, remains at 187
2 lbs total, 0.48%
Rulon's late-night snackage suddenly becomes a non-issue, as Jen is berated by the trainers for opting out of Brett's services for the week off-campus. As the member of the losing team with zero weight loss, she's automatically eliminated. At home, she shows off a reasonably nice figure, having dropped from a starting weight of 278 to 173. She's spending her time working out with her little brother and shopping for tacky clothes with her galpals, to which I say, hey, whatever spins your stationary bike. Enjoy your life and make sure to buy something nice for the finale.