Hello Biggest Loser fans and welcome to another season of our favorite
cut-throat competitionfeel good weight loss show! It seems like it was just days ago that Season 6 ended. Oh wait, it was! Considering that most of the NBC shows this season have tanked miserably, I guess it makes sense to ram another season of a moderately successful show down our throats right away. If we keep going at this pace, by the start of 2010 we might be on Biggest Loser 29 and the shows might be 5 hours long. Lord help us! Anywho, the season premiere is sure to be chock full of background and heart wrenching stories and the like. Let's meet our new crop of couples just waiting to have their asses kicked by Bob and Jillian!
The show begins in true Biggest Loser fashion, with Bob and Jillian screaming at us to make changes in our own lives. This season appears to be one of “-est”s. The biggest woman, the youngest man, the oldest contestant, the heaviest person ever. As the show begins, the would-be contestants wait anxiously in a hotel room to hear whether or not they made the show. Alison comes in and... surprise! They all made the show! They jump and scream and cry. Our contestants this season are...
Best Friends: Joelle, 41 and Carla, 36
Cousins: Sione, 29 and Filipe, 27
Best Friends: Daniel,19 and David, 23
Husband and Wife: Estella, 63 and Jerry, 63
Cousins: Dane, 28 and Blaine, 28
Mother and Daughter: Shannon, 29 and Helen, 48
Friends and Former Models: Laura, 24 and Tara, 23
Father and Son: Ron, 54 and Mike, 18
Mother and Daughter: Cathy, 48 and Kristin, 28
Engaged Couple: Nicole and Damien, 31
Sisters: Mandi, 30 and Aubrey, 28
As they pull up to the ranch and walk into the gym, they are still optimistic and hopeful and excited. Ah, the first day is so magical, isn't it? They find out as soon as they enter the gym that they will jump right into their first workout. The catch? No trainers. They have to begin on their own. That sounds safe for a bunch of people who have no idea how to work out or use machines, doesn't it folks? Bob and Jillian are watching on monitors connected to hidden cameras just shaking their heads. After Bob and Jill can't take it anymore, they barge into the gym. Meanwhile, Jerry (the old guy) starts to feel dizzy and tells his wife he feels like he is going to go down. His speech started to slur and his eyes started to roll back in his head. While the medical team tends to him, he passes out right in the middle of the gym. He opens his eyes and continues breathing. The ambulance comes and takes him away to the hospital. Wow, that was intense.
Bob and Jillian are ready to pick their teams. After giving a little speech, Bob and Jillian are allowed to pick 1 team each. That team then picks the next team, etc etc. Jillian gets to go first. She picks the White Team of Jerry and Estella. Bob picks the Silver Team of Carla and Joelle. Here is how the rest of the picks shake out:
White Team: Jerry and Estella (Husband and Wife)
Black Team: Dane and Blaine (Cousins)
Green Team: Laura and Tara (Friends and Former Models)
Orange Team: Daniel and David (Best Friends)
Yellow Team: Mandi and Aubrey (Sisters)
Silver Team: Carla and Joelle (Best Friends)
Blue Team: Sione and Filipe (Cousins)
Red Team: Nicole and Damien (Engaged)
Pink Team: Shannon and Helen (Mother and Daughter)
Brown Team: Ron and Mike (Father and Son)
Purple Team: Cathy and Kristin (Mother and Daughter)
Since Cathy and Kristin were the last team chosen, they get to pick whether they want to train with Bob or Jillian. They choose Bob. Come on, they are women. What woman wouldn't want to train with Bob and those abs of his? Now that the teams are established, it's time for the first weigh-in. Bob and Jillian get to see what kind of lbs they are working with.
Stella 242lbs (Jerry still isn't back from the hospital)
Helen 257lbs and Shannon 283lbs for a combined total of 540lbs
Kristin 360lbs and Cathy 293lbs for a combined total of 653lbs
Mandi 263lbs and Aubrey 249lbs for a combined total of 512lbs
Nicole 269lbs and Damien 381lbs for a combined total of 650lbs
Laura 285lbs and Tara 294lbs for a combined total of 579lbs
Filipe 364lbs and Sione 372lbs for a combined total of 736lbs
Blaine 365lbs and Dane 412lbs for a combined total of 777lbs
Mike 388lbs and Ron 430lbs for a combined total of 818lbs
Carla 379lbs and Joelle 309lbs for a combined total of 688lbs
Daniel 454lbs and David 393lbs for a combined total of 847lbs
Carla is the heaviest woman to be on the show ever. Mike, at 18, is the youngest competitor ever. Daniel is the heaviest contestant to ever weigh in on the Biggest Loser. The Orange Team (Daniel and David) are the heaviest couple ever to weigh in on the show. This season is the biggest season yet on the show. Bob is just amazed at how big the cast on this season is.
It's time for the first workout with the trainers. Jillian claims she isn't going to yell, just kick people out. Laura, who appears to be this season's drama queen, is making a big show of being on the treadmill. She claims she can't breathe, etc. She throws up while running on the treadmill. Eww. Bob shows his team the “BodyBugg” which is the monitor we always see the teams wearing on their arms. It hooks into a computer and helps a person keep track of what they are eating and how many calories they burned, etc. *insert Bob's endorsement here*
Jerry comes back to the ranch and we find out that his blood pressure dropped very quickly, causing him to pass out. He is allowed to come back and continue to work out. Woo hoo!
Now it's time for the very first challenge of Season 7. The contestants meet Allison on a bridge in downtown LA. She explains to them that they are in between 2 lives: the unhealthy and unhappy lives they used to lead and the healthy and happy lives they will soon lead. There is a “bridge of challenges” between these 2 lives. Clever. On the bridge, there is a big mound of dirt and a tractor. There are 250,000lbs of sand on the bridge. The object of the game is to start at one end of the bridge, race over the giant sand mound to the other side of the bridge, raise your team's colored flag, and run back. The first 5 teams to do this will race in Round 2. The top 2 teams from Round 2 will race in a final Round 3. The team that wins the challenge will get immunity at this week's weigh-in.
The 5 teams that advance to Round 2 are:
Green: Laura and Tara
Red: Nicole and Damien
Black: Dane and Blaine
Yellow: Mandi and Aubrey
Blue: Sione and Filipe
The 2 teams that advance to Round 3 are:
Black: Dane and Blaine
Yellow: Mandi and Aubrey
I felt bad for Tara. She really kicked butt but Laura was just dragging behind.
The winning team is... Black! Wow that was a photo finish! Blaine and Dane win immunity.
Since this is the first episode, we get to find out the results of all the tests the contestants had to go through before they got on the show. Ron has fat deposits in his liver. Helen and Shannon are both made up of 50% body fat. Helen is 48 but her biological age is really 60. Blaine has a giant liver full of fat and very small lungs because of all the fat pushing on his organs. Some of this stuff is scary.
Back in the gym, Jillian makes sure her teams all have their water bottles. Whoops! Those pesky and forgetful kids Dan and Dave have forgotten theirs. What's a thirsty contestant to do? Duh nuh nuh nuh! Brita to the rescue! Jillian shows them how to get water from the Brita attachment on the faucet or from the Brita pitcher. We get it. Brita sponsors the show. They save the environment, save you money, blah blah. Thanks Brita! If I say Brita one more time, do you think they'll pay me for endorsing their product? *cough*Brita*cough*
Anywho, Jillian and Bob are ready for some whip crackin' in the gym for the last chance workout. Jillian keeps asking Lauren for answers about her weight and she just starts to bawl. Bob thinks that Joelle talks too much. Tara comforts her. Aww, I heart Tara. She might be my favorite. She has a good attitude and is always there for Laura. What, no more last chance workout footage? That's lame. I wanted to see some people puke!!
Now that the last chance workouts are over (or at least the whole 2 minutes they showed us), it's time for the weigh-in. Yay! After the players file in, Allison informs everyone that there will be no elimination. Hmm, sounds fishy to me. Bob and Jillian pick up what I'm putting down and immediately ask Allison what the catch is. There will be no elimination, buuuuuuuuuut... 9 people will be going home. Huh? Here's how it works. Each team will weigh in. The team with the highest percentage of weight loss will stay above the yellow line and stay intact as a couple. Dane and Blaine have immunity so they have no worries. The 9 teams that fall below the line will each have to choose 1 person from their team to go home. That is so stupid. There better be another twist because this twist sucks. Please, let's twist again! Now, for the weigh-in results...
Blaine: Starting weight 365/Current weight 351 (-14)
Dane: Starting weight 412/Current weight 392 (-20)
Black Team Total: -34lbs
Carla: Starting weight 379/Current weight 368 (-11)
Joelle: Starting weight 309/Current weight 296 (-13)
Silver Team Total: -24lbs (-3.49%)
Daniel: Starting weight 454/Current weight 424 (-30)
David: Starting weight 393/Current weight 377 (-16)
Orange Team Total: -46lbs (-5.43%)
Nicole: Starting weight 269/Current weight 251 (-18)
Damien: Starting weight 381/Current weight 364 (-17)
Red Team Total: -35lbs (-5.38%)
Jerry: Starting weight 369/Current weight 344 (-25)
Estella: Starting weight 242/Current weight 233 (-9)
White Team Total: -34lbs (-5.56%)
Filipe: Starting weight 364/Current weight 347 (-17)
Sione: Starting weight 372/Current weight 349 (-23)
Blue Team Total: -40lbs (-5.43%)
Mandi: Starting weight 263/Current weight 251 (-12)
Aubrey: Starting weight 249/Current weight 236 (-13)
Yellow Team Total: -25lbs (-4.88%)
Kristin: Starting weight 360/Current weight 341 (-19)
Cathy: Starting weight 293/Current weight 281 (-12)
Purple Team Total: -31lbs (-4.75%)
Helen: Starting weight 257/Current weight 245 (-12)
Shannon: Starting weight 283/Current weight 270 (-13)
Pink Team Total: -25lbs (-4.63%)
Laura: Starting weight 285/Current weight 272 (-13)
Tara: Starting weight 294/Current weight 273 (-21)
Green Team Total: -34lbs (-5.87%)
Mike: Starting weight 388/Current weight 366 (-22)
Ron: Starting weight 430/Current weight 398 (-32)
Brown Team Total: -54lbs (-6.60%)
Ron's 32lb weight loss is the most anyone has ever lost in a single week on campus. With the enormous Brown Team loss this week, they win the weigh-in. They are both safe. The other 9 teams have to choose 1 person from their team to go home. Wait! Could there be another twist? There's a way back! One person from each team will go home. After 30 days, if their teammate has managed to stay in the game, the other person from the team gets to come back! I'm still kind of mad about this whole thing. Isn't the whole point of this show that COUPLES come to the ranch to lose weight TOGETHER with the help of a Biggest Loser TRAINER? Obviously these people can't do it on their own, that's why they are on the show! Stupid, stupid.
After much debate, the teams have decided who stays and who goes.
Pink: Helen stays and Shannon goes home
Blue: Filipe stays and Sione goes home
Green: Tara stays and Laura goes home
Yellow: Mandy stays and Aubrey goes home
Red: Damien stays and Nicole goes home
Orange: Dan stays and Dave goes home
Silver: Joelle stays and Carla goes home
Purple: Kristin stays and Cathy goes home
White: Jerry stays and Estella goes home
Jeez, that was sad. Boo! Worst twist ever!
The previews for next week's show tell us that this week the couples lost a record breaking total of 382lbs, but next week's show could make Bob lose his marbles. Jillian says she has never seen Bob that mad, EVER! That's it. That's all the preview we get. NBC is getting stingy!
I hope everyone enjoyed the season premiere of The Biggest Loser. Come back next week same time, same place when we find out together what other crappy twists they can throw at us!