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Thread: Biggest Loser 1/22 Recap: How to Piss Off Bob in 10 Easy Steps

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    Biggest Loser 1/22 Recap: How to Piss Off Bob in 10 Easy Steps

    Last week on The Biggest Loser we saw Amanda and her husband Neill, perhaps the laziest (and most deluded) player in the show’s history, finally go home. Neill is probably still sitting at home, insisting that he worked harder than all of the other players. Combined.

    We rejoin the action this week where we left it: in the elimination room. With only seven teams remaining, Ali says, the competition is about to enter a new phase. She’s going to have to ask them to make an important decision that may have far-reaching consequences: if they could vote off one team right now, who would it be? She cautions them not to answer now. Ali sends the teams back to the dorms to talk it over. She tells them not to discuss their decision with the other teams because the vote will affect the rest of the game. Everyone returns to their rooms to begin mulling over their decision.

    Right off the bat, Maggie and Jenn aren’t happy about having to vote off a team after they’ve just been saved from elimination. They hope the teams they vote for will understand that they had to vote for someone. Jackie quickly decides she and Dan should vote for the Black Team, but Dan is afraid to make a move against them so soon. Jackie is sure the Black Team sees her and Dan as the biggest threat and would take the opportunity to vote them out. Meanwhile, Mark and Jay talk about how the Yellow Team is the biggest threat. They don’t even mention the Orange Team. Poor Jackie and her ego. The other teams discuss how to make their decision. Roger and Trent decide to flip a coin, or rather, a plate, to make their choice. Paul and Kelly settle on voting for the Black Team, even though Kelly thinks the Grey Team has more weight to lose.

    Psych!
    In no time at all, the teams are back in the elimination room to cast the second vote of the night. Yellow Team: They like all the teams, so they didn’t have a personal reason to vote for any of them. They had to look at which team was the biggest threat. For that reason, they vote for the Black Team
    Blue Team: They voted for the team who they’ve felt was their main competition from the beginning. That’s two votes for the Black Team.
    Purple Team: They decided to go after the team they felt was their biggest threat. They vote for the Yellow Team.
    Black Team: They guys claim they wracked their brains trying to come to a decision. They decided to pick from the two teams who have fallen below the Yellow Line and voted for the Yellow Team, reasoning that the Purple Team still needs to be there. Maybe I missed something in their explanation, or they’re confused about who won the weigh-in last week. Whatever.
    Grey Team: They based their decision on who had been hovering around the Yellow Line and chose the team that had been below the Yellow Line twice. That’s one vote for the Purple Team.
    Orange Team: They claim to love everyone who’s there and that they had no clue how to pick a team. Looked at facts of the Yellow Line and chose the Purple Team.
    With a three-way tie, it all comes down to the Pink Team: They claim they considered all the ways they could vote and decided to go with the team that is the biggest threat. With that, the Yellow Team wins…or loses…or something.

    Kelly begins to cry, thinking that she and Paul are going home. She even gives their “going home” speech. Ali lets Kelly talk for a while, which I think is a bit cruel, before revealing that the Yellow Team is not going home. Everyone looks puzzled, while Kelly and Paul just look relieved.

    Once again, there’s a change in the game. For this week only, The Biggest Loser is going to be a game of one against all. Since the Yellow Team was “voted off,” they will be competing against the other six teams. The six teams will compete as one team in both the challenge and at the weigh-in, where their weight loss percentages will be combined and averaged. If the Yellow Team has a greater percentage of weight loss than all the other teams, they will get to choose who goes home. If the Yellow Team loses the weigh-in, they will immediately go home.

    To help them this week, the Yellow Team can chose which trainer they’d like to work with. The other teams will work with the trainer Paul and Kelly don’t choose. Paul doesn’t have a preference, but after a bit of discussion, he and Kelly decide to work with Jillian, because she’s won every season she’s trained. The other six teams will be training with Bob this week.

    Getting Warrior
    While the six teams gather to talk strategy, Kelly is just pissed. She feels completely blindsided. This was the first week they did well and other teams were ready to send them home. Paul tries to look at it as a positive thing and then rambles on about things awakened deep inside of him that I would rather not know about. He then spouts off some crap about kung fu and tigers while epic movie music plays in the background. Really, I don’t think the producers should encourage this behavior by giving him a soundtrack.

    Last week, Paul and Kelly won the Biggest Loser Team of the Week when they won the weigh-in. This week, they meet with Ali to find out about their prize. Once again, the winning team has to hike up a hill to get it. Also once again, they’ll have to choose between three envelopes: Luxury, Family and Game Play. Kelly immediately begins to lobby for the Luxury reward, but Paul puts the kibbutz on that nonsense: they’ll be choosing Game Play. Period. He reasons that, if they don’t pick Game Play, they’ll be back with their families next week anyway. In the end, they compromise and decide that they’ll pick Luxury if they win a second weigh-in. The Game Play reward this week is an additional two pounds off their total at the weigh-in of their choice.

    Bob and Jillian arrive to learn the results of the elimination. The Six are all sitting together and both the White and Yellow Teams are missing. Bob isn’t surprised to see Amanda and Neill gone, but asks about Paul and Kelly. The Six inform Bob and Jill about the change in the game this week and that Jillian will be training the Yellow Team only. Jillian feels horrible: it’s a lot of responsibility. She could save the Yellow Team, but that would send another team she cares about home. Bob remarks that the game has been mostly about weight loss up until this point, but now the game is on. He definitely seems disappointed about the change. So am I.

    Oatmeal, The Wonder Food
    Jillian goes to meet her trainees for the week and finds Paul dressed in some goofy, kung fu suit thingie. Jillian tries to brush over his costume and tells them both she’s flattered they chose her. When Paul rants on about declaring war on the other teams, Jillian cautions him: they don’t want to alienate themselves by letting anger fuel them. If they make it through next weigh-in, they have to get along with everyone else, so they need to continue to have good relationships with the other teams.

    In the gym, Bob works out The Six. When the Yellow Team arrives, they refuse to reveal what their prize is. Bob vows to push The Six hard so they will succeed. PinkAli tells us this first day of Bob-Only training was Hell: he’s turned into a complete maniac. Jill is pushing the Yellow Team equally hard. She works out with Kelly one on one for 2 hours and then moves onto Paul. His entire head is so red, it looks like it’s going to pop. Because, apparently, Jillian didn’t work him out hard enough, Paul sneaks down to the gym in the middle of the night for another workout. I have to say, after kind of a lackluster beginning, Paul really is kicking butt. Take that, Neill!

    It’s time for my least favorite part of every episode. This is the portion of the show where we pay the sponsors. No, not the commercials. This is the very (un)subtle product pimping disguised as a nutrition lecture part of the show. This week’s “commercial” is for Quaker Weight Control Oatmeal, which Dan is forced to make for the rest of the teams. All he has to do is boil water and pour it into bowls with the dried oatmeal and he’s having problems. Not like it’s Duck à l'Orange, dude. Dan admits that his usual breakfast used to come courtesy of a fast food drive thru and included a “breakfast soda.” What’s so different about a breakfast soda, you might ask? You drink it in the morning. Nice.

    Giving it All Away
    This week’s challenge is another nighttime challenge. The teams all greet Ali poolside. Please God, no bathing suits. The rules of the challenge are simple (as challenges on this show go): The Six are competing against the Yellow Team. There are two balance beams across the pool. The players will have to go across the balance beams, grab a peg, go back across the beam and place the peg into the team’s board. Every player must place at least one peg. The winning team will get letters from home.

    As usual, these challenges are really fun to recap. Here are the highlights:
    Paul does all but the last lap himself
    Trent does a header into the pool. He’s the only one to fall in.
    Kelly takes the last lap for her team and Paul reminds her that they’re playing for Jillian.
    Paul put their team so far ahead, that it’s not even a contest. He and Kelly win easily.

    The Six looks shattered over the loss of the letters home. Paul and Kelly have a quick discussion and tell Ali they’ve decided not to take the reward: they’d rather the other twelve players get their letters instead. Way to win some popularity, guys.

    Web Weaving and Water Loading
    The next morning, the order of the day is game play. Soon enough, the Yellow, Orange, Blue and Purple Teams decide to form an alliance to get the Black Team out. In a secret meeting (in front of lots of cameras, of course) they decide to take a page from last season and water-load to throw the weigh-in.

    Later, Bob meets with his people and they tell him about the challenge. He’s shocked to learn that the Yellow Team won and thinks that giving away the letters from home was game play. Well yeah, probably. Still, it was kind of nice. Bob says he’s definitely interested to see how the weigh-in will turn out. He lectures The Six: he expects good weight loss from everyone and game play drives him nuts. He cautions them to keep him in the loop with everything and to not make him look like an idiot at the weigh-in. Bob tells us that, if they water load, he’ll jump up on that scale and rip their heads off. That’s a show I’d pay to see.

    When Jillian meets with the Yellow Team, Paul tells her about their decision to give up the letters from home. Jillian thinks it was both a smart decision and also very sweet. While Kelly admits that giving up the letters was the right decision, she’s still upset. Paul tells us he wanted those letters from home too: he misses his girlfriend. I’m sure she’s thrilled to hear Paul talk about how he wants to be back with Kelly. That’s going to be a fun discussion when Paul finally goes home.

    The teams return to their rooms to find letters from home. Everyone cries and smiles over letters, pictures and drawings from children. Brittany and Bernie share pictures with each other: it’s a nice opportunity for them to get to know each other. Especially shocking are pictures of Roger even larger than when he started the show. He’s definitely come a long way.

    More Manipulation
    It’s weigh-in time and we still have 40 minutes to go. I think I know which way the weigh-in’s going to go. Paul admits he’s nervous about the weigh-in, but Dan is feeling pretty good since he knows Paul and Kelly won’t vote him and his mother out. Jay, on the other hand, know that, if Paul and Kelly win the weigh-in, he and his brother are going home. The teams all file into the weigh-in: The Six on one riser with Bob, Paul and Kelly on the other riser with Jillian.

    Ali explains the rules. The Six will all weigh in and their average percentage of weight loss will be calculated. Then Paul and Kelly will weigh in. If the Yellow Team loses, they will go home immediately. If they win, everyone will go to the elimination room, where the Yellow Team will send one team home. Oh, and there’s one more thing. The team with the highest percentage of weight loss will get immunity this week. Mark and Jay immediately light up. This could shoot holes in the plan to get the Black Team out. Bob tells Ali he’s very interested in this weigh-in because he’s expecting great numbers. If he doesn’t see them, he warns, he’s going to be very skeptical.

    Bette-Sue: was 231 lbs / is 224 lbs (-7lbs)
    Ali: was 206 lbs / is 198 lbs (-8 lbs)
    Totals: 15 lbs / 3.43% of body weight

    Roger: was 331 lbs / is 319 (-12 lbs)
    Trent: was 388 lbs / is 375 lbs (-13 lbs)
    Totals: 25 lbs / 3.48% of body weight

    Brittany: was 203 lbs / is 201 (-2 lbs)
    Bernie: was 248 lbs / is 241 lbs (-7 lbs)
    Totals: 9 lbs / 2.00% of body weight
    Ali questions Bob, who says he has no explanation: he’s baffled by Brit’s number. He tells us there’s no reason Brittany should have only lost 2 pounds.

    Mark: was 249 lbs / is 235 lbs (-14 lbs)
    Jay: was 268 lbs / is 258 lbs (-10 lbs)
    Totals: 24 lbs / 4.64% of body weight
    When will they make Jay put his shirt back on so I don’t have to look at his breasts? That’s way more disturbing than Janet Jackson’s nipple.

    Maggie: was 221 lbs / is 218 lbs (-3 lbs)
    Jenn: was 236 lbs / is 229 lbs (-7 lbs)
    Totals: -10 lbs / 2.19 % of body weight

    Jackie: was 216 lbs / is 214 lbs (-2 lbs)
    Dan: was 265 lbs / is 264 lbs (-1 lb)
    Totals: -3 lbs / .62% % of body weight
    Cue the shot of Bob with his mouth wide open. Mark is sure this is game play. Bob is shocked, especially by Dan’s number. Dan tells us they wanted to bring down the weight loss percentage…. so they did. Through clenched-teeth, Bob says people will do what they have to do. He looks piiiissed. I hope everyone has their running shoes on, because our favorite smurfy trainer looks like he’s going to kick some ass.

    The group average = 2.81% of body weight

    Now it’s Paul and Kelly’s turn. Kelly looks like she’s going to toss her cookies. I’m sure Jillian would be all in favor of that: it would probably help her drop another pound. Ali tells them they need to lose 12 pounds to win the weigh-in.
    Kelly: was 248 lbs / is 240 lbs (-8 lbs)
    Paul: was 269 lbs / is 260 lbs (-9 lbs)
    Totals: 19 lbs / 3.39% of body weight
    Paul runs over, grabs Jillian and carries her up to scale. He wants her to share in their win.

    The Black Team is Biggest Loser Team of the Week. They have immunity this week and the other teams aren’t looking so happy. Bette-Sue looks like she ate something bad.

    Enough, Already!
    Now that the Black Team is safe, the Yellow Team has some thinking to do. Everyone returns to the dorms to kiss butt and lobby to stay. Paul and Kelly discuss their decision privately but, soon enough, Jackie and Dan bust in and urge the Yellow Team to trust them. Jackie counsels them to think about what will keep in the game the longest. Jackie wants the Pink Team gone, as does Paul. Paul says he and Kelly vowed only to vote for one of the teams that voted for them to be eliminated: Black, Purple and Pink. Paul and Kelly go talk to Bette-Sue and Ali, who tells them that a vote for Pink would just be revenge. When Paul and Kelly talk to Maggie and Jenn, the girls try to assure them that, if the Yellow Team falls below the Yellow Line next week, they won’t vote to eliminate Paul and Kelly. Is it me, or is this all starting to sound too much like Survivor?

    I love the uber-dramatic countdown to the elimination ceremony that they’ve added in the bottom corner of the screen, à la 24. It really adds to the drama, don’t you think?

    In the elimination room, Ali summarizes the Yellow Team’s week of highs and lows. Kelly says she just wants to get healthy and lose weight and stay there as long as they can. She says the responsibility of this vote has not been a blessing. Mark listens, looking smug about having immunity. Kelly, who appears to be doing all the talking this time, says the decision was tough: all of the teams deserve to be there. What stuck in their mind while making this decision was what happened at the last elimination ceremony. Still, they didn’t know whether they should take out the biggest threats, go with the lowest weight loss numbers or jump into game play. She addresses the Pink, Purple and Black Teams and lectures them that she wants to see better numbers from all of them. While she and Paul like and respect all of the teams….at this point, PinkAli stops Kelly and tells her to just spit it out. She and Bette-Sue are clearly bitter over this recent turn of events. I’m sure they thought they were safe allying with the biggest threats in the game. Kelly dispenses with any more rambling: she and Paul vote to eliminate the Pink Team.

    Ali immediately goes off on a rant. She announces that she and her mother are the first team to get unjustly sent home. Bette-Sue sits there, still looking like she ate something bad. I think this is her natural expression. Either that or she eats a lot of bad stuff. Bette-Sue then tells everyone to stop kissing everyone else’s ass: there’s a lot of fake going on there. She didn’t come there for herself and she clearly isn’t a very good loser. Both Ali and her mother ramble on and on. Finally, they stop talking and leave.

    There are six teams left and the competition is heating up, Alison says. Starting next week, they won’t be eliminating teams: they’ll be eliminating individual players.

    The Pink Team’s “journey video” is, mercifully, short. Ali tells us working out has been hard, but worth it. Bette-Sue says the show was a great experience and that she and Ali have reached a new level of communication and trust. Bette-Sue has lost a total of 49 pounds and Ali has lost 61 pounds. Ali looks much thinner and Bette-Sue only had one chin now. Well done!

    Next Week: There are no more teams and everyone competes on their own. It’s going to be tough. Jillian might actually cry. Plus, I no longer have to deal with a contestant with the same name as the host. Huzzah!
    Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' - Isaac Asimov

    I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

  2. #2
    Staying Afloat speedbump's Avatar
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    Re: Biggest Loser 1/22 Recap: How to Piss Off Bob in 10 Easy Steps

    Yay! Excellent recap, Critical. I completely forgot to set the DVR. Also, an few thousand extra kudos for tackling months and months of two hour Biggest Loser epsiodes. You're grrrrrreeeaat!
    You got to cry without weeping. Talk without speaking. Scream without raising your voice.- U2

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    Re: Biggest Loser 1/22 Recap: How to Piss Off Bob in 10 Easy Steps

    Quote Originally Posted by Critical;2767694;
    Bob tells us that, if they water load, he’ll jump up on that scale and rip their heads off. That’s a show I’d pay to see.

    He looks piiiissed. I hope everyone has their running shoes on, because our favorite smurfy trainer looks like he’s going to kick some ass.
    I wouldn't want to be in their shoes right now.

    Excellent recap, Crit.
    He who laughs last thinks slowest

    Maybe we should chug on over to namby pamby land where we can find some self confidence for you, you jackwagon!

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    FORT Fogey momrek06's Avatar
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    Re: Biggest Loser 1/22 Recap: How to Piss Off Bob in 10 Easy Steps

    Excellent recap...my DVR is on the fritz and we could hardly see anything when we tried watching it last night. So thanks so much!

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    FORT Fanatic Oceansands's Avatar
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    Re: Biggest Loser 1/22 Recap: How to Piss Off Bob in 10 Easy Steps

    Is it me, or is this all starting to sound too much like Survivor?

    Thanks Critical for another great recap. Nope, it's not you, sounds like the producers are having trouble coming up with original ideas.

    The use of water loading goes against everything this show is supposed to be about. Wonder what brain child came up with that one?

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    Re: Biggest Loser 1/22 Recap: How to Piss Off Bob in 10 Easy Steps

    thanks for the recap I hate the water loading though!!! I thought that was against the rules.

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    PWS
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    Re: Biggest Loser 1/22 Recap: How to Piss Off Bob in 10 Easy Steps

    to FORT, purplegator! We did get the impression it would be against the rules in future shows at the end of the last season, but this one was probably already being filmed while that was being shown, so maybe it is too early to see the effect of that ruling.
    You know, I"ve begun to wonder if everyone doesn't waterload a bit for their first pre-show weigh in, so that that explains the HUGE weight losses we see at the first post training weigh in. I mean yes, even without waterloading you'd expect a big loss the first time due to some "water loss", but it seems to get more and more extreme. I wonder if they don't even hint to a guy who almost 400 pounds, how much more dramatic it would be if they could call him a 400 pounder....

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