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Thread: 1/15 Show discussion **Spoilers**

  1. #31
    FORT Fanatic hikari's Avatar
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    Re: 1/15 Show discussion **Spoilers**

    Neill reminds me so much of my brother-in-law, both in temperament and physical size. They even look alike. So the dynamic in that marriage reminds me very much of what I witness at my sister's house. It would not surprise me at all if Amanda does absolutely everything around the house and with the child. Neill is a website designer . . .my bro-in-law also works with computers & this very sendentary lifestyle contributes to his weight problem as I'm sure it does Neill's.

    Most of these contestants continually impress me with how hard they work once at the campus, but once in a while we get one like Neill, a big guy who refuses to put his heart in it. If being humiliated on the scale by women who are half his size isn't enough to make him discover his manly competitive spirit, I don't think anything will. I wish them both the best in their weight loss efforts at home, but without a big personality makeover for Neill, I doubt any progress will stick. Unfortunately in marriage, usually there is one partner who is less motivated, more lazy, has more bad habits, etc, and this weaker partner usually winds up dragging the other down to his/her level more often than the more energetic, positive one is able to elevate them to their level. Hope this is not the case for Neill and Amanda, but odds are against them.

  2. #32
    Organizing my sock drawer RBmumsie's Avatar
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    Re: 1/15 Show discussion **Spoilers**

    I keep thinking that we're missing something about Neill - that's he's really shy and withdrawn and doesn't really know how to interact with others or put his best foot forward. Maybe a huge problem with self confidence?
    Well-Behaved Women Seldom Make History...Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

  3. #33
    FORT Fanatic hikari's Avatar
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    Re: 1/15 Show discussion **Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by RBmumsie;2755869;
    I keep thinking that we're missing something about Neill - that's he's really shy and withdrawn and doesn't really know how to interact with others or put his best foot forward. Maybe a huge problem with self confidence?
    I'm sure you probably have something there, Mumsie, about Neill being shy and uncomfortable around people. Many computer whizzes go into their field precisely because they are more comfortable with technology than with carbon-based lifeforms. I feel for Neill in that respect--I would be a wreck having cameras (and the criticism of a nation!) focused upon me.

    However--and I speak this as a naturally shy person who has to force herself to be outgoing in a very public profession--shyness alone (or a self-confidence problem) is not sufficient explanation for Neill. That might explain why he didn't want to speak up on camera, or why he stood stoically staring ahead while Bernie ripped him a new one. "Shyness" doesn't explain why Neill took so many breaks in the gym, or why he spoke very disrespectfully to his trainer, among other things. Bad manners and laziness are two very different traits from shyness. All the seasons have featured contestants who were quiet and self-effacing on camera and yet worked their butts off in the gym. I note that Neill didn't seem to have any trouble using his voice to complain to the trainers--he just chose not to use it when it could have been in a more positive light.

    Again, speaking as a shy person, who often suffers crises of self-confidence--that is how I am, but I have come to see that even so, that is not an excuse for failure. Results are what matter in the end, not elaborate excuses, and shy people may have to work harder than the naturally outgoing to make that happen. But particularly in the case of this show, where everyone enters with baggage, low self-esteem, body image issues and poor fitness levels on account of their size, I don't see why Neill should be exempted because that unresponsive, passive exterior is masking a soul of such great sensitivity that he shouldn't be held to the same standards as everyone else. It's hard for everybody . . .as a young man who doesn't have any major health problems and the love and support of a good woman, Neill has many more advantages than some there, 'shy', or not.

    I'm sure there are qualities in there which only his wife knows, and that made her fall in love with him. But the ones who voted him off are the ones who have been living and sweating side-by-side with him for weeks. I trust that they actually have a more complete picture of Neill than we do, and based their decision upon that. We didn't see every vote, but it certainly looked like it was unanimous that Neill be out, with Amanda as the unfortunate collateral damage. They might have kept her around by herself, but if there was merit to Neill's staying, his fellow contestants didn't see it.

  4. #34
    FORT Fogey
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    Re: 1/15 Show discussion **Spoilers**

    In retrospect I am sure they wished they had chosen luxury. There is no advantage in having two votes, at this stage of the game anyway. Neither couple was a threat and it didn't appear they ever would be.

    I was stunned when Neil said that Amanda spoke because she can turn on the tears (among other reasons). You know they had a fight over that! We all know she didn't cry on purpose and I believe he is so inept at communication that he blurted without thought. It may have suprised him as much as everyone else.

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