Welcome everyone, we are in the countdown mode of the showÖor at least I am. One week to go till we find out who least deserves to win. This past week has just moved right along with people getting eliminated bringing us to the final four. Zach won HOH, and on Sunday, put Dick and Daniele up on the block. Both were shocked and couldnít believe this was happening. Dick did what any mature 45 year old man would do, he threatened Zach. Letís all wake ourselves up and get ready for a whine fest on tonightís episode.
I Hate These People!
Much to my shock, tonightís episode is live so that means I get to make fun of Julie Chen. Her hair looks large, her outfit is drab, and the sound of her voice makes me want to pound my head against the sidewalk. Great, now I feel much better. Julie takes us right to the group and into a montage of Dick being a dick. Dick and Daniele seem surprised that they were put on the block this week proving how stupid they really are. If they didnít see that coming then they really are the12 year olds they act like.
Frankly, there are 4 people left in this game and the fact that Dick and Daniele are carrying on like babies is completely absurd. Two people had to go up on the block and if they donít realize that others think of them as a threat then they should be kicked out for being so stupid. Dick decides to attack Zach about his decision and Dick tells Zach that he has been honest this whole game and that is why he will win the money over him. I guess he forgot that he has been a giant ass to everyone. The fact that Dick thinks he is a shoe in to win this game proves that he is not only stupid but highly delusional. I almost laugh at his crazy.
Jameka is so happy that she made this secret alliance with Zach, although she now has to back peddle on some of the comments she made about him in the past. This is the work of a true Christian woman, trash someone, and then befriend them and pretend like it never happened. Where do I sign up for her church?
I Kind of Hate These People Too
Finally, we get some footage of what is happening in the jury house. There has been much speculation that Jen walked out and was not going to be there for the finale. I guess CBS wanted to calm out nerves and show us that she did check in. Dustin is the first to check in and he canít believe how nice the house is. He is looking forward to a week alone and I am looking forward to never seeing him again. Jen is the next to enter the house and Dustin seems surprised to see her. I am happy to see that she was able to put on the finest of whore clothes for her stay in isolation.
Amber is next and they both seem happy to have her join them or happy to have mindless conversation. We will never know but I think we can all agree that the house is now officially stupider. Jessica enters next and everyone is ecstatic to see her and completely surprised. Amber is upset because now one of the ďbad peopleĒ is in the house with them. As they are all celebrating, Eric sneaks in the backdoor, much to Dustinís surprise. Jessica canít believe he is there and she is excited to hang out with himÖor finally have all the sex with him.
Eric brings a copy of the tape for everyone to see what happened when he was eliminated. Like me, they donít really seem to care. Amber whines on Jameka, and hopes that the only ďgood personĒ left will win the game. They are all upset that Zach is left in the house and they will be upset if Dick or Daniele wins the show.
People I Used to Hate but Donít Because They Are Gone
In anticipation of the upcoming veto ceremony, Zach and Jameka sit up in the HOH and study trivia to prepare. Jameka seems to be on top of it while Zach seems to be missing a brain. Downstairs, Dick tells Daniele that if they canít win they deserve to go home. Well, yes, that is the way the game would work. Daniele seems to disagree though. Upstairs, Zach and Jameka are praying. Zach has found religion but I guess he doesnít realize that god has not found the Big Brother house, or he has and like most of us, just doesnít care about them.
The veto comp tonight is called Big Brother decoder. There are a bunch of clues on a wall and the hamsters have to figure out which houseguest they pertain to. Once they figure out which guest, they spin the big wheel to get a number. The answer will tell them how many minutes they have been in the BB house. Everyone gets to work and I canít muster any energy to cheer on any of them, they are all losers and I wish America had the option to evict them all right now and put an end to this mess.
They all seem neck and neck but there is no way to tell because we keep jumping from one person to the next. Daniele finally rings the buzzer and is correct making her the winner of the final veto competition. Dick runs over and is hugging her and he seems to be crying. They are very excited, I could care. Zach congratulates them and Dick just yells at him. He is so mature, itís so fruuuuuustrating to me to have to watch.
Dick then walks over and hugs Jameka and tells her he is sorry that she is going and Zach will be staying. Dick seems pretty sure that he or Daniele is going to win this, which is a pretty delusional thought to me. I know the odds are in their favor but they are both really annoying, that goes a long way. He is frankly the biggest ass I have ever seen in my whole life and it would be just a shame to reward that kind of behavior.
Itís Really Hard to Like These People so I Guess I Still Hate Them
Julie gathers the group in the living room and talks to them. She tells Daniele that she has tied Janelle in the most number of vetoís won in a season. Good for her, she will never be loved like Janelle and when she discovers that, it will be very satisfying. Julie asks some more pointless questions and I just stare blankly at the screen wanting to bang my head against the wall to make this all end.
The veto ceremony starts and Daniele stands up to use her veto and gives some speech about paying her father back for what he did for her and she removes him from the block. He is shocked and actually seems to be speechless. Jameka is moved onto the block and she and Daniele are each given the opportunity to give a speech on why they should stay. Jameka tells them she has enjoyed her experience and she understands what is going to happen. Daniele tells them she had a great experience and if he votes for her to leave she will not speak to him for another couple of years. Dick, scared of the threat, votes to evict Jameka. She leaves, I donít cry, and the houseguests could care less.
Jameka makes her way to the front for her interview with Julie. Julie asks her if her friendship with Zach will continue. She tells her that she doesnít see phone calls but maybe emails about once a month. So basically, she will never speak to him again. Julie goes on to ask some more questions and I just tune them out because I really donít care. Finally, Julie shows Jameka a picture of her new niece, who is absolutely adorable, and I am glad I came out of my self-induced coma to see that.
I Hate Scary Bunny on a Stick
Itís finally nearing the end of the show and everyone moves to the backyard for the HOH competition. They are told itís a three part competition. The winner of the first round will move onto the third round and the two losers will compete in round two to see who moves onto round three. Round three will be played live on Thursdayís show.
The competition is called the bunny hop and the whole backyard looks like a carrot patch. They each climb onto a large platform and hold onto a key above their head. They need to maintain contact with the key at all times during the competition. A bunny on a pole starts to circle the patch and they need to jump over the pole when it gets to them. The last person standing is the winner of the round. Just when they think everything is great, it starts to rain over them, soaking them. The show ends as they are all standing.
Make sure to check out Thursdayís show to see who wins or do like me and check out the Live Feeds Forum and find out now. I am off to have severe nightmares about that scary bunny they attached to that stick.
If you found that bunny to be slightly traumatizing, send me a PM.