Live Feed Recap, Sun-Mon, 8/1: “Does This Mean Kmart Loves Me?”
It’s heartwarming to see a huge, faceless corporation make the first move. A little gift to soften her up; better yet, two or three. Then a card to express exactly how you feel. Those three little words: “Mention our name!” April got her loot, and the sponsor got its airtime. In television terms, it’s a perfect relationship.
Party Hard, Kmart-style
- April was treated to a birthday party by Big Brother. Gifts were furnished by Kmart: a purple leopard print camisole, a white leather belt with metal studs, and a digital camera with its own printer.
- After the party, Sarah (whose birthday was last week) was called into the Diary Room and told she would also get a camera.
- After a lockdown, the houseguests found quarters around the house. They put them in the gumball machine, and six of them received movie passes inviting them to compete in a luxury competition.
- Sarah, Jennifer and Rachel won; they watched Four Brothers, which hasn’t yet been released to the public.
- Sarah took James off the block, and Maggie put up Janelle in his place.
Have we mentioned the sponsor enough times already? Sunday afternoon, not long after the houseguests had cooked an enormous brunch and eaten together, Big Brother called them in from a lockdown to a party, complete with a huge banana cake and two types of ice cream. April found a stack of gifts to open with a sign that read, “Happy Birthday, April, from Kmart.” April was near hysterical with happiness, and she excitedly wondered if she had just been made a spokesperson for Kmart. “Does this mean Kmart loves me?” she asked several times.
It was probably a bit of a surprise to Sarah, who had been given a Big Brother party the week before. Her presents were decorations, party hats, pizza and soda. No retro-80's tank top and tacky belt. Certainly no electronic equipment - a real gold nugget in a house with no television, radio, or phone privileges. Sure, Sarah looked a little nonplussed during the party, but did she blame April for her good fortune? April was worried that she would, so she found Sarah afterwards and graciously apologized for the windfall. Soon Sarah got word from the Diary Room that she would also get a camera from Kmart. Uh-oh, April’s new boyfriend is already cheating on her!
Jujubees - So Luxurious
Sunday must be Big Brother’s play day, because after another lockdown, the houseguests began to find quarters around the house. Like giddy schoolchildren, they crowded around the gumball machine to trade their coins for a prize. Someone (I never did figure out who) tried to hold onto more than one, but after a brief bout of fishtanks, Howie was provided with a quarter. The point was for each houseguest to have one quarter so that six invitations to compete in a luxury competition could be dispersed from the gumball machine. Maggie, Beau, Ivette, Rachel, Sarah and Jennifer got the nod; the others got necklaces and bracelets. April wished she had the chance to compete, and Ivette commented that she of all people should be content, since she got all that loot earlier in the day. Mrrrooowwrr! April and Ivette seem to be grating on each other lately.
The houseguests pile out to the backyard to watch the girls - oops, the girls plus Beau, if he even counts as a boy - attempt to screw in hundreds of light bulbs to spell out a phrase. It was soon apparent that the team of Sarah, Jennifer and Rachel were in the lead, and they pulled out a win. They must have had Sarah in mind when they invented the game, as soon she is hopping up and down in triumph in front of a lit up sign reading SOLD OUT. *clearing throat* That’s a hint, hamsters!
The HOH room was converted into a movie theater with only three seats but about thirty pounds of theater candy. The other hamsters are allowed to look over all the bounty, but when the movie starts they are shoved out of the room and can only imagine the girls enjoying the sugar. James frets that Sarah is pigging out on junk food where he can’t keep an eye on her. He’s the kind of classy guy that likes to remind Sarah he will dump her if she gets fat. Not if she dumps you first, jerkoff.
You’re Not Going Home, James
When Sarah won the power of veto, everyone recognized that any promises they made just flew out the window. The house knew that she would use it to save her pair, and no one blamed either player. It was the only logical move; there was no reason to bank on the goodwill of their fellow houseguests. So why is the whole house whispering about Sarah and James at odd moments; even confirmed enemies like April and Kaysar?
April brings an idea to her group: what if they could approach Kaysar with - NO! says a chorus of voices before she can finish her sentence. But she persists, saying they might be able to use James’ machinations to their advantage by telling the other side he had been sending Sarah up to talk to Maggie and her group while James was down with Kaysar’s group. April has been having roundabout conversations with Kaysar, hinting that he needs to check his group for leaks. Now she wants to name names, and after much discussion involving the coasters for visual aids, they agree that it might be to their benefit to rat out James.
Maggie, Ivette, Beau, April, and Jennifer know that they’re considered the weaker players in the house. Only a couple of them have competed in veto competitions, and they haven’t won or even placed well so far. By pointing out James’ duplicity, they create a target larger than themselves. It should be noted that this plan isn’t coming from Maggie, although she agrees they can use it; April is the one who wants to enlist Kaysar’s help. They all agree that Kaysar will be the one voted out, but they also are aware that Kaysar will leave detailed instructions for his minions to follow, like Cappy did. They really don’t think Janelle or Howie will be able to come up with their own plans without Kaysar.
April finds Kaysar in the gold room, and asks him to bring out the hookah for a late-night treat. Kaysar, April and Beau settle down to smoke in the back yard, while Janelle and Rachel watch from across the yard. Rachel observes to Janelle that Beau and April are planning to vote out Kaysar, but have no problem sharing a hookah with him.
Little do they know, April invited Kaysar for an information swap under the disguise of a nicotine fix. She tells him specifically that James has been trying to work his way back into Maggie’s good graces by promising to put up Howie and Rachel if he wins HOH next week. In exchange, he wanted help during the POV competition. April tells Kaysar that they were always targeting James, but that they lost the chance to take him out when Sarah won the POV.
Kaysar puffs solemnly on the hookah, ruminating on James. Then he opens up a crack to April, admitting that he’s had some suspicions. Pretty soon they are gabbing like old friends - well, very restrained old friends who have discovered a common foe, at least. April calls James “evil” and says Kaysar didn’t get to know him the way Cappy’s crew did. She wonders if he’s watching them talk right now, and they invent a cover story (as if the hookah wasn’t enough). It turns out they were right to be paranoid, as James soon goes to the backyard and asks Janelle and Howie (swinging peacefully in the hammock) what the three smokers are talking about. Howie points out that all the backyard cameras are focused on the smokers, and James looks even more skittish. He scoffs that April is probably “pleading her case.” To the houseguest about to be evicted?
James is right to look nervous. April, in fact, is asking Kaysar that he pass along a proposal to the remainder of his team: that both sides of the house band together to oust James, no matter who wins HOH.
The Long Goodbye
Kaysar is a little down in the dumps, and he seems focused on one goal: instilling his plans in Janelle and Howie. He tells them over and over again to target James next week, no matter what. Forget about annoying Ivette, or the soon-to-be-powerless Maggie! Janelle and Howie agree to the plan to pretend they are friends with James. That way, if he wins HOH, they will support him in trying to get rid of Maggie. (James is highly paranoid about Maggie, because he knows she holds him responsible for losing Eric.) But if one of them wins HOH, they will put him on the block - and so will the other side of the house.
Kaysar grabs a few minutes with Maggie Monday morning and reaffirms the plan. He says that they can put up Janelle against James to keep the fiction up until the last minute. Later, Maggie recounts the offer to Ivette, April and Jennifer. Ivette looks dubious, but Maggie tells her they need to work with the other side next week. She points out that it just won’t be possible to get out James without the help of the entire house.
Kaysar spent the day in talk with his two compadres, Janelle and Howie. But there were a few quiet moments when he seemed to be gazing at Janelle longingly...while she didn’t return the look. She mentioned Michael a few times, asking Kaysar what “Mike” does in a typical day. It might have been a gentle reminder that she’s trying to start a relationship with Michael, not Kaysar. “Do you think Mike will think I’m a gold digger?” she asked at one point. Kaysar pointed out that after the editing job Michael undoubtedly got on the show, he won’t believe anything Big Brother says about her.
Maggie and Her Troops
Maggie is alarmed by Ivette’s increasing tendency to hang out with James. After a long session of coaster-tossing (which sounds like it should be a euphemism for something, doesn’t it?), in which Ivette could be seen talking more than tossing, Maggie calls her to the HOH room to talk about it with the entire group: Beau, April, and Jen. They want to know why Ivette is talking so much to James; how can she even stand to be around him? (I’m flashing back to Eric and Maggie confronting Ivette in the weight room. This isn’t the first time Ivette has been bullied by her supposed bosom friends.) Ivette says that she never gives him any information, and that she is in control of the situation. You can see a few looks being exchanged, and when Ivette pops out to grab a water, Maggie says what they are all thinking: “He’s gotten to her.”
Later, in the midst of general conversation about life in the house, April brings up something that has been bugging her to Ivette: that she’s been bring up “Cappy” all the time. Ivette looks sincerely suprised, and says she doesn’t mention him all that much. “Oh, yes you do!” seems to be the general consensus. Maggie, Jen, and April all chime in with instances of Ivette mentioning how much she misses her Cappy. Apparently April and Ivette nearly came to blows over how to cook zuchinni a la Cappy. Even Beau agrees that Ivette needs to stop. Maggie tries to explain the concept that every time she mentions Eric, it’s a reminder to Maggie of her loss. (As if he’s dearly departed. Forever. ) Ivette goes from defending herself hotly to sitting glumly on the floor, just taking it all in.
The conversation moves to other times Ivette has angered a fellow team member. Jennifer says that when she first entered the house, she heard that Ivette had called her insecure. Ivette tried to deny it, but Jennifer is certain about what she heard (since it was probably repeated by April, after all) and Ivette backs down. Pretty soon, Ivette tucks herself into her sleeping bag on the HOH floor quietly. Maggie tries to break the tension by saying that they “all suck.” They’re the team of people who suck - weak, unable to compete, sniping at each other. Everyone hugs, and the bitter conversation is forgotten for the moment.
Monday evening winds down with Janelle reading Beau’s bible on the couch, Kaysar studying his Koran, and Howie wandering around in his ripped bikini underwear. The crew in the HOH room are camped out on the floor, pretending to be comfortable, while Maggie complains that Jennifer is in the spacious bed with her, generating too much heat. Maybe she’ll kick her out before long; Maggie needs her space, you know.
I Wish That I Could Have Mikey’s Girl
Yes, it’s true: Kaysar is getting starry-eyed around Janelle, who promises to win the game so she can take him and Michael to Greece. Michael? Oh yeah, Kaysar’s friend, who spent a week locking lips with Janelle. Kaysar graciously says he will allow them to go by themselves. Janelle says no, don’t be silly! They should both come. She’ll be happy to give them some alone time. Ha ha.
Kaysar does seem to be gazing longingly at Janelle at random moments. He coaches her on the game intensely, and it’s obvious that he cares greatly about future in the game. But he also gives her advice on her love life, and tells her often that he thinks she’s beautiful inside and out...but that he doesn’t want to be one of those guys that kisses up to her all the time. He tells her that she doesn’t know what she wants - that she might come across the right guy and not even know it. *pregnant pause* “Will you cook for me when we're married after you find out Michael isn't right for you?" he asks cheekily. Then there was this little exchange:
Kaysar: Mike is so lucky.
Kaysar: He got to kiss you.
Janelle: Oh, shut up.
See you after eviction night! firstname.lastname@example.org