Jeremy - Bachelorette 4

[blue valentine]

Originally Posted by natashapierre

I didn't say unintelligent. I said ignorant. ... .Two completely different things.

Originally Posted by natashapierre

Being pretty and vibrant and fast on a four-wheeler is enough for her,
.

I also doubt that Deanna's smart enough or thoughtful or curious enough for Jesse,

he's happy with it depends on whether he wants an empty-headed but pretty and kind of bossy chick.
.

Well...

[Google]

 

[Kresge]

Originally Posted by shirin

Kresge,
Didn't I say exactly the same as what you said?
I have the same experience ,wondering for the result of my exam and heartbroken at the same time.

Yes, Shirin, I was in agreement with your post. I was just elaborating and reaffirming rather than responding to another whose post I completely disagreed with.

[Kresge]

Originally Posted by cheekychook

I hesitate to even respond to this, but I can't seem to help myself. First I'd like to point out that everything Jeremy said in that interview was in response to a question he was asked---he didn't sit down with a list of things he wanted to vent, he was asked questions and he responded. Personally, I didn't hear any "sore loser" comments coming from him, at all. I found him to be thoughtful and honest in his replies. Could he have left out the comment about De not really knowing what the grassy knoll was? Sure he could have---but why should he? I have no doubt that it happened the way he said---and it was an amusing story. Was the amusement somewhat at her expense? Yes---but he was apologetic and respectful as he recounted it, and honestly, it certainly doesn't make her look any worse than the scene ABC chose to air where she admitted she didn't know what the space needle was. But I digress.

Jeremy is not inconsistent in his story. He doesn't say he never watched the show, he said he didn't watch every minute of every episode----we know from his friends that he watched some of the episodes in group settings, and that he frequently watched his own scenes but not the scenes with other guys---and we must keep in mind, people who are actually cast members on the show ALL have a hard time remembering what was aired vs. what really happened---the cast members are there for hours upon hours of taping that doesn't air---no one can expect them to keep exactly straight what things happened and didn't air and what things aired (and perhaps insinuated things that didn't actually happen).

As far as the racing date still upsetting him, I think he was upset at his clocked time/speed on the track, or its depiction on the episode, not at the attention DeAnna gave to Graham---that's JMO though.

Regarding the Fantasy Suite card, I don't understand why this issue is still causing so much confusion. He told her he was in love with her---she responded with a smile, a two hands on his face kiss, and the words "I'm glad you told me"---then she gave him the fantasy suite card. In past seasons people have NOT been given the Fantasy Suite invitation---and DeAnna, of all people, the woman who let go both guys on a 2-1 date, the woman who let Richard go before he kissed her on their 1-1, could most certainly have said "you know, I wish I could offer you this card, but I can't" or she could have at least offered him the card and then used that opportunity to talk with him privately and clue him in that she was feeling it more for the other two---she did neither of those things. I am not saying they slept together---I don't know, and frankly it is none of my business---the point is, she spent the night with him, which was an intimate experience regardless of whether or not anything sexual occurred, and that intimate experience was a form of leading him on and making him believe that she was returning his sentiments. When she later told him that she knew "as soon as he told her how he was feeling" that she would have to let him go, that brought up a question---if she KNEW THEN why on earth would she spend the night with him after she had realized he wasn't the one? That's all he has wanted clarified, and he has every right to have wanted to get clarification on that.

As far as being bitter, I think Jeremy has cause to be way more bitter than he is----but he's not, because he is a bigger person than that. If I were in his shoes I would be bitter about being lead on, I would be more bitter about her willingly making it seem like I came back a week later for a desperate plea when in reality I just spoke with her later the same day for some closure, and I would be beside myself that she kept the bar exam results to herself. I have waited for bar exam results with several friends, and have waited for my own clinical licensing exam results---it is nerve-wracking to wait for the results from exams like that---knowing that results are coming out that day can make even the most stoic test taker queasy ----the fact that she knew he had passed and didn't tell him just blows me away with its complete disrespect and utter insensitivity, not to mention that it underscores how clueless she was about its significance and how blinded she was by her own self-importance.

As far as "promoting himself" goes, Jeremy is doing nothing more than accepting interview requests and showing up at events that are planned by his fans---yes, he would like to be the next bachelor, but it is not in his nature to "promote himself" so that is being handled by people who love him, respect him, and care for him enough to try to make it happen for him. Jeremy has managed not only to earn the love and respect of his many, many fans, but obviously he has also captured the interest of many who are not his fans, as evidenced by the fact that many of them have posted here, discussing his 2 hour interview (which they deemed important enough to spend time listening to) and commenting on photos on his personal myspace page (which they felt it was important enough to access and check out). Anyone who can generate that kind of interest from fans and non-fans alike seems like exactly the kind of guy TPTB might want to see as their next Bachelor. As always, JMHO.

Thank you Cheekychook for these wonderful posts!

I was hoping you'd be around and take the time to respond, as you are far more eloquent and tactful than I am.

[MomLady]

Originally Posted by cheekychook

...

Regarding the Fantasy Suite card, I don't understand why this issue is still causing so much confusion. He told her he was in love with her---she responded with a smile, a two hands on his face kiss, and the words "I'm glad you told me"---then she gave him the fantasy suite card. In past seasons people have NOT been given the Fantasy Suite invitation---and DeAnna, of all people, the woman who let go both guys on a 2-1 date, the woman who let Richard go before he kissed her on their 1-1, could most certainly have said "you know, I wish I could offer you this card, but I can't" or she could have at least offered him the card and then used that opportunity to talk with him privately and clue him in that she was feeling it more for the other two---she did neither of those things. I am not saying they slept together---I don't know, and frankly it is none of my business---the point is, she spent the night with him, which was an intimate experience regardless of whether or not anything sexual occurred, and that intimate experience was a form of leading him on and making him believe that she was returning his sentiments. When she later told him that she knew "as soon as he told her how he was feeling" that she would have to let him go, that brought up a question---if she KNEW THEN why on earth would she spend the night with him after she had realized he wasn't the one? That's all he has wanted clarified, and he has every right to have wanted to get clarification on that.

As far as being bitter, I think Jeremy has cause to be way more bitter than he is----but he's not, because he is a bigger person than that. If I were in his shoes I would be bitter about being lead on, I would be more bitter about her willingly making it seem like I came back a week later for a desperate plea when in reality I just spoke with her later the same day for some closure, and I would be beside myself that she kept the bar exam results to herself. I have waited for bar exam results with several friends, and have waited for my own clinical licensing exam results---it is nerve-wracking to wait for the results from exams like that---knowing that results are coming out that day can make even the most stoic test taker queasy ----the fact that she knew he had passed and didn't tell him just blows me away with its complete disrespect and utter insensitivity, not to mention that it underscores how clueless she was about its significance and how blinded she was by her own self-importance.

...

In which previous shows was the fantasy card not offered to the people? If the card is not offered, then it is a dead give away of what is up. I can't imagine TPTB saying do not offer the card to someone or even giving that option..

I know that it was not accepted by people, that is their choice to accept or refuse it.

As I see it, DeAnna had to offer the card. It was upto Jeremy to refuse it. Maybe Jeremy may be hurt by this, but that is part of the show.


Why should Jeremy be bitter? The whole show is about being led on, unitl you do not get a rose and for the F1 to think it is not them.

I can understand if DeAnna told him it was him and it was not then that would be different then her going along with the production of the show that both her and the guys signed up for.

DeAnna told Jeremy she is glad he told him how he feels, she did not say she is in love with him and he is the guy she will accept a proposal from.

Blaming DeAnna for doing her job of giving the fantasy card as is required, or not letting everyone go at the same time when she knew she was not going to pick them does not make sense. The show follows certain guide lines that DeAnna does not have control over that.

If Jeremy or others do not understand the fantasy card or that they may be kept longer then when DeAnna knew she was not going to pick them, then it is their fault for not knowing how the show is produced.

As for making it look like she made it look like he came back, that is TPTB which decide these things. Clues for the viewers to look for is the clothing setting etc. Sometimes even that changes.

PI are lead on words are changed. Most of the show is produced for entertainment.

Last season Jenn's results for dancing was part of the show, because TPTB wanted it a part of it. We got to see it talked about often. How do we know what was and was not talked about. How do we know if DeAnna was or was not allowed to talk about. Jeremy's edited character mentioned his parents and the link to DeAnna. That was the the one dimentional edit that Jeremy got. We saw Jeremy and Deanna discussing it. Maybe it was discussed and we were not shown.

the fact that she knew he had passed and didn't tell him just blows me away with its complete disrespect and utter insensitivity, not to mention that it underscores how clueless she was about its significance and how blinded she was by her own self-importance.

I found DeAnna a great Bachelorette, since she related to each guy differently. She did not treat them all the same. I found she listened to what their likes were etc.

Someone that is clueless and blinded by her own self-importance would not have related to the various bachelors on their level.

I saw a very different DeAnna then the one that you have described.

[cheekychook]

Originally Posted by MomLady

In which previous shows was the fantasy card not offered to the people? If the card is not offered, then it is a dead give away of what is up. I can't imagine TPTB saying do not offer the card to someone or even giving that option..

I know that it was not accepted by people, that is their choice to accept or refuse it.

As I see it, DeAnna had to offer the card. It was upto Jeremy to refuse it. Maybe Jeremy may be hurt by this, but that is part of the show.


Why should Jeremy be bitter? The whole show is about being led on, unitl you do not get a rose and for the F1 to think it is not them.

I can understand if DeAnna told him it was him and it was not then that would be different then her going along with the production of the show that both her and the guys signed up for.

DeAnna told Jeremy she is glad he told him how he feels, she did not say she is in love with him and he is the guy she will accept a proposal from.

Blaming DeAnna for doing her job of giving the fantasy card as is required, or not letting everyone go at the same time when she knew she was not going to pick them does not make sense. The show follows certain guide lines that DeAnna does not have control over that.

If Jeremy or others do not understand the fantasy card or that they may be kept longer then when DeAnna knew she was not going to pick them, then it is their fault for not knowing how the show is produced.

As for making it look like she made it look like he came back, that is TPTB which decide these things. Clues for the viewers to look for is the clothing setting etc. Sometimes even that changes.

PI are lead on words are changed. Most of the show is produced for entertainment.

Last season Jenn's results for dancing was part of the show, because TPTB wanted it a part of it. We got to see it talked about often. How do we know what was and was not talked about. How do we know if DeAnna was or was not allowed to talk about. Jeremy's edited character mentioned his parents and the link to DeAnna. That was the the one dimentional edit that Jeremy got. We saw Jeremy and Deanna discussing it. Maybe it was discussed and we were not shown.





I found DeAnna a great Bachelorette, since she related to each guy differently. She did not treat them all the same. I found she listened to what their likes were etc.

Someone that is clueless and blinded by her own self-importance would not have related to the various bachelors on their level.

I saw a very different DeAnna then the one that you have described.

Obviously all viewers are entitled to their opinion---what purpose would this board serve if we all saw things exactly the same way? That said, I personally liked DeAnna much better at the beginning of the season than I did at the end.

I absolutely understand the premise of the show, the trickery of editing, and the need to keep viewers guessing even if it means manipulating time frames and splicing and dicing scenes. What I object to is outright, scripted lying.

During the final episode DeAnna does a PI in a gold and white dress. She says she brought two great guys back to Newnan and her family loved them, then she says "coming back to the Bahamas was hard---I found out that Jeremy wanted to talk to me"---she then proceeds to go on in an elaborate soliloquy about how she knows how she felt when Brad hurt her and she hopes that she is able to bring Jeremy some peace---she is shown saying "I pray that he leaves here with a better understanding and that he feels better about me sending him home" while wearing that dress---I don't see how this could be edited from any other time---her hair, makeup, clothing, etc are identical as she is saying her family loved Jason and Jesse and then says she found out Jeremy wanted to talk to her and she prays he leaves with a better undertanding. IMO it is the editor's and producer's right to manipulate the footage, because it is their job and goal to create drama and "interesting" tv---it is not, however, anyone's "duty" or "right" to recite or require someone to recite a scripted lie. To me that goes beyond the realm of what should be acceptable.

Again, it is entirely JMO, but I personally could not keep something as important as the fact that they had passed the bar exam from someone who I cared about---as a matter of fact, I would feel bad keeping that information from someone I didn't like---when you are privy to that sort of life-altering information YOU TELL THE PERSON. Maybe I just have different priorities and a different definition of how you should treat those you respect. (And we "know" about this because of what has been said in post show interviews---she knew, and she did not tell him---the fact that many people (DeAnna and however many producers, assistants etc) knew before Jeremy did and didn't pass that info along to him in a timely fashion is, IMO, just wrong).

I do not think the contestants are required to offer the Fantasy Card suites to anyone---I believe she did indeed have the option of not offering it. Even if she were required to offer it, she certainly was under no contractual obligation to make out with him on the bed when they got there. The editors are definitely talented enough to have insinuated that romance occurred in the Fantasy Suite even if all they did there was play Monopoly---they didn't have to use their editing talents, though, because they had actual footage of them kissing to use instead. Even if all of that was somehow "required" I still can't be convinced that she couldn't have given him some indication that she wasn't reciprocating the feelings he had expressed to her. Furthermore, she was not forced to later tell him that she realized she had to let him go when he told her he was in love with her. When someone tells you they love you, you generally have one of 3 reactions 1. Yippee! 2. Hmmmmm or 3. Oh cr*p. If she knew she had to let him go upon hearing those words, I am guessing her reaction was closest to option number 3---in which case it seems a dubious choice to have offered up that fantasy card. If that was done strictly out of obligation, fine---that doesn't mean the Jeremy doesn't have a right to question her about that action.

I am not trying to be at all provocative or rude with any of my response, or with this next question----I am just truly curious to know the answer to this---how did DeAnna try to relate to each of the bachelors "on his level"? Granted there is a boatload of footage that we never got to see, but what we did see was her yelling at the lot of them, complaining that no one was opening up to her enough, accusing them of being more interested in each other than in her, making them sing (repeatedly)---I know it was her show and IMO, that's exactly what she helped it to be---all about her---I saw very little evidence of her trying to be "on the level" of any of them---she wanted them all to be on her level, period. If anything, I would say DeAnna was being a little bit of a chameleon in terms of painting herself as someone different to each of the guys---to make sure they were all falling for her---and before anyone else says it, I will admit that people tend to do that in the early phases of relationships...but she did it a lot---I actually do believe that her definition of "who she is and what she wants" did evolve and change dramatically during the course of the show, and I think that she did make her best possible choice by selecting Jesse---I just don't see how she went out of her way to be "on anyone's level" other than repeatedly stating that when she was with one guy that's the guy she focused on at that point in time. And not to belabor a point, but if she were relating to Jeremy on anywhere near his level she would have told him his bar results, even if she needed to write it in the sand next to the limo with the edge of her shoe. JMO, of course.

[carewba]

cheeky, you are exactly right. Some on this thread are so negative for anything that mentions Jeremy in a positive way.....makes me think they should not post anymore as it seems to also be vindictive.....not sure why......

[Bloomers]

Originally Posted by MomLady

In which previous shows was the fantasy card not offered to the people? If the card is not offered, then it is a dead give away of what is up. I can't imagine TPTB saying do not offer the card to someone or even giving that option..

I know that it was not accepted by people, that is their choice to accept or refuse it.

As I see it, DeAnna had to offer the card. It was upto Jeremy to refuse it. Maybe Jeremy may be hurt by this, but that is part of the show.


Why should Jeremy be bitter? The whole show is about being led on, unitl you do not get a rose and for the F1 to think it is not them.

I can understand if DeAnna told him it was him and it was not then that would be different then her going along with the production of the show that both her and the guys signed up for.

DeAnna told Jeremy she is glad he told him how he feels, she did not say she is in love with him and he is the guy she will accept a proposal from.

Blaming DeAnna for doing her job of giving the fantasy card as is required, or not letting everyone go at the same time when she knew she was not going to pick them does not make sense. The show follows certain guide lines that DeAnna does not have control over that.

If Jeremy or others do not understand the fantasy card or that they may be kept longer then when DeAnna knew she was not going to pick them, then it is their fault for not knowing how the show is produced.

As for making it look like she made it look like he came back, that is TPTB which decide these things. Clues for the viewers to look for is the clothing setting etc. Sometimes even that changes.

PI are lead on words are changed. Most of the show is produced for entertainment.



Quote:
the fact that she knew he had passed and didn't tell him just blows me away with its complete disrespect and utter insensitivity, not to mention that it underscores how clueless she was about its significance and how blinded she was by her own self-importance.


I found DeAnna a great Bachelorette, since she related to each guy differently. She did not treat them all the same. I found she listened to what their likes were etc.

Someone that is clueless and blinded by her own self-importance would not have related to the various bachelors on their level.

I saw a very different DeAnna then the one that you have described.

Trista reneged on Russ and did not allow him the chance at spending the night in the Fantasy Suite. I believe it can be done if that is absolutely what the Bach/ette wants.

I agree with those who say that if indeed DeAnna knew at the moment that Jeremy said he loved her that she was going to let him go and she was going to spend the night with him, then she should have given him signals or indications that he wasn't the one. Body language is a great communicator. She wouldn't even have had to say a thing. This too could be done, and other contestants have said that they either knew or sensed something was up before they ever got to the end.
Charlie said that he knew something was up because Trista didn't even spend a whole evening with him on their last chance date - she was ready for the date to be over way too early.

Even though the premise of this show makes leading someone on to a certain degree inevidable, it is deplorable when we can use entertainment as an excuse for the lack of human kindness - or that we expect to be entertained by others' emotional suffering.
I for one believe it is time to question that rationale given as an excuse when behavior exceeds what is necessary to drive the process to it natural conclusion.

At some point, the Bach/ette is simply responsible and should be held accountable for his/her own behavior regardless of the show's premise, TPTB's wishes, or the (supposedly) cruel thirst for emotional suffering by the viewing audience.

As the seasons go by, we are hearing more and more that the Bach/ette are allowed more concessions than we originally thought possible. DeAnna stated more than once that they worked with her, and that they more or less let her do things the way that she wanted to do them. If DeAnna had not wanted to make that misstatement about Jeremy coming back the next week rather than later that night, she could have insisted on not saying it. There was enough drama involved in the (potential) scene for me to believe that they would have allowed it.

As for DeAnna withholding the information that Jeremy had passed his Bar? I am perplexed. How do you possibly explain or justify that? Hopefully, she didn't understand the significance as that explanation is preferable to perhaps she was insensitive to his need to know. Neither one reflect well on DeAnna.

For whatever it is worth, I was one of the fans that was right there after Brad's season rooting for DeAnna to get her own show. For the most part I critiqued the show based on its editing and did not criticize her personally; however, I do believe that it is counterproductive to deny the negative impact of some of her actions.

[shirin]

Originally Posted by cheekychook

Obviously all viewers are entitled to their opinion---what purpose would this board serve if we all saw things exactly the same way? That said, I personally liked DeAnna much better at the beginning of the season than I did at the end.

I absolutely understand the premise of the show, the trickery of editing, and the need to keep viewers guessing even if it means manipulating time frames and splicing and dicing scenes. What I object to is outright, scripted lying.

During the final episode DeAnna does a PI in a gold and white dress. She says she brought two great guys back to Newnan and her family loved them, then she says "coming back to the Bahamas was hard---I found out that Jeremy wanted to talk to me"---she then proceeds to go on in an elaborate soliloquy about how she knows how she felt when Brad hurt her and she hopes that she is able to bring Jeremy some peace---she is shown saying "I pray that he leaves here with a better understanding and that he feels better about me sending him home" while wearing that dress---I don't see how this could be edited from any other time---her hair, makeup, clothing, etc are identical as she is saying her family loved Jason and Jesse and then says she found out Jeremy wanted to talk to her and she prays he leaves with a better undertanding. IMO it is the editor's and producer's right to manipulate the footage, because it is their job and goal to create drama and "interesting" tv---it is not, however, anyone's "duty" or "right" to recite or require someone to recite a scripted lie. To me that goes beyond the realm of what should be acceptable.

Again, it is entirely JMO, but I personally could not keep something as important as the fact that they had passed the bar exam from someone who I cared about---as a matter of fact, I would feel bad keeping that information from someone I didn't like---when you are privy to that sort of life-altering information YOU TELL THE PERSON. Maybe I just have different priorities and a different definition of how you should treat those you respect. (And we "know" about this because of what has been said in post show interviews---she knew, and she did not tell him---the fact that many people (DeAnna and however many producers, assistants etc) knew before Jeremy did and didn't pass that info along to him in a timely fashion is, IMO, just wrong).

I do not think the contestants are required to offer the Fantasy Card suites to anyone---I believe she did indeed have the option of not offering it. Even if she were required to offer it, she certainly was under no contractual obligation to make out with him on the bed when they got there. The editors are definitely talented enough to have insinuated that romance occurred in the Fantasy Suite even if all they did there was play Monopoly---they didn't have to use their editing talents, though, because they had actual footage of them kissing to use instead. Even if all of that was somehow "required" I still can't be convinced that she couldn't have given him some indication that she wasn't reciprocating the feelings he had expressed to her. Furthermore, she was not forced to later tell him that she realized she had to let him go when he told her he was in love with her. When someone tells you they love you, you generally have one of 3 reactions 1. Yippee! 2. Hmmmmm or 3. Oh cr*p. If she knew she had to let him go upon hearing those words, I am guessing her reaction was closest to option number 3---in which case it seems a dubious choice to have offered up that fantasy card. If that was done strictly out of obligation, fine---that doesn't mean the Jeremy doesn't have a right to question her about that action.

I am not trying to be at all provocative or rude with any of my response, or with this next question----I am just truly curious to know the answer to this---how did DeAnna try to relate to each of the bachelors "on his level"? Granted there is a boatload of footage that we never got to see, but what we did see was her yelling at the lot of them, complaining that no one was opening up to her enough, accusing them of being more interested in each other than in her, making them sing (repeatedly)---I know it was her show and IMO, that's exactly what she helped it to be---all about her---I saw very little evidence of her trying to be "on the level" of any of them---she wanted them all to be on her level, period. If anything, I would say DeAnna was being a little bit of a chameleon in terms of painting herself as someone different to each of the guys---to make sure they were all falling for her---and before anyone else says it, I will admit that people tend to do that in the early phases of relationships...but she did it a lot---I actually do believe that her definition of "who she is and what she wants" did evolve and change dramatically during the course of the show, and I think that she did make her best possible choice by selecting Jesse---I just don't see how she went out of her way to be "on anyone's level" other than repeatedly stating that when she was with one guy that's the guy she focused on at that point in time. And not to belabor a point, but if she were relating to Jeremy on anywhere near his level she would have told him his bar results, even if she needed to write it in the sand next to the limo with the edge of her shoe. JMO, of course.

ITA.WHAT A GREAT POST.

[SilverCreeklady]

Jeremy interview at his meet & greet at Brad's bar

EXCLUSIVE: A night with Jeremy Anderson « Reality Update

"Jeremy said he discovered DeAnna picked Jesse a week after he got back from the Bahamas. He was shocked, he said. But after watching the show, understood better why.

“After watching it, I understood why she picked him,” he said. “He’s like the male version of her.” And he diplomatically said that he wishes her the very best and hopes she’s happy.

[latergator]

Originally Posted by SilverCreeklady

Jeremy interview at his meet & greet at Brad's bar

EXCLUSIVE: A night with Jeremy Anderson « Reality Update

"Jeremy said he discovered DeAnna picked Jesse a week after he got back from the Bahamas. He was shocked, he said. But after watching the show, understood better why.

“After watching it, I understood why she picked him,” he said. “He’s like the male version of her.” And he diplomatically said that he wishes her the very best and hopes she’s happy.

a truer statement has never been said! meanna with a little meme.

great statement by Jeremy! he's going to make a good US diplomat.