Originally Posted by appiah01;3941759;If I was friends with Ali since she is right around my age bracket, I honestly would tell her that she needs to stop picking losers and that the whole "there are too many fish in the sea" thing isn't really true. Guys in their 20s and 30s right now are in delayed extended adolescence. It is actually pretty hard to find a stable, mature, unselfish guy who isn't looking for an "accessory" while he pursues his dreams, career, fun, friends, whatever. I would tell her that she should really try dating out of type a bit because love actually does grow and unless he's totally unattractive maybe giving a guy with a great personality and great, compatible qualities is worth it, particularly since all of the guys she has chosen in the past have been duds. The ever elusive spark is important but not even really foundational in establishing a life long relationship because sparks come and go but commitment is the foundation of lasting love (particularly today when people divorce practically on a whim).
I would tell her she doesn't have to marry the guy but to just give it a shot because you never know and I would tell her that I get the whole career thing- I am ambitious as well and I understand wanting money and fame, but it isn't real and doesn't last and companionship and family are really key and if you meet someone who gets that, you should hold on to him. Finally, I'd tell her that you don't have to kiss a ton of frogs to find a prince. Sometimes life just presents him to you and you should have the wisdom and maturity to go for it.
Honestly, I feel like having too many options, whether it be relationally or vocationally, is crippling my generation and making us emotionally stunted and immature. I definitely don't think Ali is a bad person. She seems like a 100% normal, regular girl....she is just totally prototypical of peeps in my generation and I am not sure that we aren't missing somethings that people in our parents and grandparents generations seemed to understand.
Your post ever so true.