Bachelorette 5**** Spoilers, episode 8 with screencaps

[Arielflies]

Originally Posted by seeker

....Will f3 guys show up at ATFR or will it just be Reid and Jillian there? (if he who she chooses)

Traditionally the F3 guy appears at the Men Tell All and the F2 guy appears at the ATFR.

[Google]

 

[albean99]

Originally Posted by I'msotired

I was just addressing the precedent reasons that I didn't like. Sorry if it sounded otherwise. Didn't mean to make it sound like a slam against Ed. I just hope they don't make it a regular part of future shows.

I didn't think you were slamming Ed. I agree that it shouldn't happen regularly. Hopefully it will just be an exception to an unwritten rule.

[joliepaige]

Originally Posted by I'msotired

My main concern with the precedent is how it affects futures shows and whether it will become commonplace to have contestants coming and going. I hope not; it really screws with the viewers developing attachments. Take Ed for instance. Some liked him until he left/came back. Some liked him better after he left/came back. I would think, though, that we might agree it disrupted the "flow" of watching Jillian develop her "connection" with Ed. That's one of my primary concerns with it.

I'm thinking the same thing..future shows will probably go in the same direction. You will never know when they are truly eliminated..except for possibly the 1st 2 episodes..after that who knows.

[MamaBJ]

I truly believe Ed left for business related reasons. My hubby gets called away to "solve a problem" with a problematic customer from time to time. He's home in a day or two and everyone is happy. So Ed was seen out and about with or without a gf or ex-gf. I'm pretty sure he didn't think he would be coming back on the show for sure, so he got on with his life. I see no problem with that. Keeping that rose made me think he would.

Jillian was crushing harder and harder on Wes. TPTB were concerned because they knew that although Wes liked Jillian, he wasn't committed to the girl. He is committed to the music. The gf/ex-gf stuff is a smoke screen. Although Jillian is attracted to Kip and Reid, her heart was leaning toward the cowboy. That would have been a disaster. The same as the previous 3 seasons going bust. What to do?

Jillian was attracted to Ed before he left. Maybe we can get her to see the light about Wes and bring back someone to take his place if nothing builds with Kip or Reid. Ergo the Jake/Wes scene and the dinner conversation in Spain. Buh bye Wes.

Now the dilemna is will she find something with these remaining three guys. Surprisingly, Reid was opening up and Jillian was softening toward him. This was a welcome surprise. The attraction had been there from day one with Kip, but she was insecure about him. Ed comes back and Jillian remembers that original attraction and needs to figure out if that spark is still there or has it fizzled. She needs to allow him back to find that out so that she won't wonder what might have been.

The gf thing with Wes is simply too much to overcome and she can't allow him any further into her heart. I think Wes offers to bail at this point. He may have been set to leave anyway. Maybe Jillian decides this on her own. We will never know for sure.

This sets up the F3 in Hawaii. I think Jillian makes her choice after the LCD. I think she may have been leaning one way or the other before, but knows for sure now. Maybe she made that decision prior to Spain. Maybe Jake's performance made a bigger impression on her than we were allowed to see. I remember an interview where she said she thought it would be one guy then she changed her mind the next week. A lot of scenarios could fit this.

I think she picks someone because they don't want a repeat of Brad's season and the backlash that came from it. I'm just not sure it is an engagement. Any of these guys would be a good choice. I know who I would choose for myself or one of my daughters...LOL. The choice is Jillians, and I'm impatient to find out who she chooses.

If this needs to be moved to a different thread, feel free to do so.

[sanlee]

Originally Posted by Lily'sMom

How is that not pursuing her? he came back for her. Oh wait thats right he ran away from her, must mean he will leave her again when times get rough

Thanks for the laugh!!

[ironcat]

Originally Posted by MamaBJ

I truly believe Ed left for business related reasons. My hubby gets called away to "solve a problem" with a problematic customer from time to time. He's home in a day or two and everyone is happy. So Ed was seen out and about with or without a gf or ex-gf. I'm pretty sure he didn't think he would be coming back on the show for sure, so he got on with his life. I see no problem with that. Keeping that rose made me think he would.

Jillian was crushing harder and harder on Wes. TPTB were concerned because they knew that although Wes liked Jillian, he wasn't committed to the girl. He is committed to the music. The gf/ex-gf stuff is a smoke screen. Although Jillian is attracted to Kip and Reid, her heart was leaning toward the cowboy. That would have been a disaster. The same as the previous 3 seasons going bust. What to do?

Jillian was attracted to Ed before he left. Maybe we can get her to see the light about Wes and bring back someone to take his place if nothing builds with Kip or Reid. Ergo the Jake/Wes scene and the dinner conversation in Spain. Buh bye Wes.

Now the dilemna is will she find something with these remaining three guys. Surprisingly, Reid was opening up and Jillian was softening toward him. This was a welcome surprise. The attraction had been there from day one with Kip, but she was insecure about him. Ed comes back and Jillian remembers that original attraction and needs to figure out if that spark is still there or has it fizzled. She needs to allow him back to find that out so that she won't wonder what might have been.

The gf thing with Wes is simply too much to overcome and she can't allow him any further into her heart. I think Wes offers to bail at this point. He may have been set to leave anyway. Maybe Jillian decides this on her own. We will never know for sure.

This sets up the F3 in Hawaii. I think Jillian makes her choice after the LCD. I think she may have been leaning one way or the other before, but knows for sure now. Maybe she made that decision prior to Spain. Maybe Jake's performance made a bigger impression on her than we were allowed to see. I remember an interview where she said she thought it would be one guy then she changed her mind the next week. A lot of scenarios could fit this.

I think she picks someone because they don't want a repeat of Brad's season and the backlash that came from it. I'm just not sure it is an engagement. Any of these guys would be a good choice. I know who I would choose for myself or one of my daughters...LOL. The choice is Jillians, and I'm impatient to find out who she chooses.

If this needs to be moved to a different thread, feel free to do so.

I can believe that Jill's initial choice was Wes, based on first impressions and incomplete information, and that she was really crushed and her ego badly bruised when she realized he didn't reciprocate her feelings. That doesn't mean her reaction was the same as arrogant and outraged Deanna, who emotionally took her ball and went home after the Graham fiasco. It is hard to imagine what it must be like for someone to have so many attractive suitors all at once; Meredith notwithstanding, your attentions have got to be somewhat divided among a few faves. In these circumstances, I would imagine that once you realize that your "chosen one" was faking it, it wouldn't be impossible to "snap out of it" and start refocusing on somebody else.

[coastalbc]

Originally Posted by halfpintdynamit

I agree...at least for most people I know. People that don't give eye contact when I'm talking to them, well, it's disconcerting and distracting. I don't think they value what I'm saying.

Bottom line, IMO it is disrespectful. I have been taught by some amazing mentors that we should look at everyone as if they're wearing a sign around their neck saying "Make me feel important/special." I believe we all need to feel important, that what we say is valued. When you listen to someone else, you are showing them respect and that you value what they have to say.

I agree with you completely and that is the point that I was making. I have been in the business industry for over 20 years...........I was in the tourism industry for half that time. I was taught by my some mentors and also the instructors through the university that if you want to keep someones attention and respect, you give it in turn by paying attention to them when they are discussing something and maintain eye contact. When someone doesn't with you, then that is when you wonder if what they are telling you is the truth.

[coastalbc]

Originally Posted by pattycake92

Kip and Reid look away too sometimes. Go back and watch their conversations. Ed looks at her plenty. I agree it would be weird if he never looked away.

When Jill is talking, or when Kip and Reid are talking to Jill, they always seem to have eye contact. When there is no conversation, then yes, their eyes wander, which is perfectly normal. If you recall, during the 1 on 1 time with Reid at Lake Louise when they were sitting on the ice bench, it seemed like a lot of time went by that they never said a thing.........just looked into each others eyes and the whole conversation between them was happening through those eyes.

[Nova14]

Originally Posted by Lily'sMom

How is that not pursuing her? he came back for her. Oh wait thats right he ran away from her, must mean he will leave her again when times get rough

Of course Jillian will have some pause about him leaving. Anyone would and should. He left and that hurt her. The others stayed. Doesn't mean she shouldn't forgive him but she should question him at length about leaving and coming back. It's a convo she needs to have.

Did he finish his work and then come back? What if the project was to go 3 weeks longer would he have decided to quit or resign to get her back? Did his employer approve him returning? She'd be crazy not to have a long and serious talk about what comes first in his life from here on out before deciding on a future with him. In a relationship and ultimately a marriage family needs to come first.

[coastalbc]

Originally Posted by Starshine_16

I don't call leaving for work and then coming back as trying to persue her.If he really wanted to persue her,leaving and then coming back was not the way to do it.IMO Reid is also persuing her and to a slightly lesser extent Kip is too.

Very, Very true Starshine. Jill had said lots of times that she wants someone that will stand by her and stick it out regarding this show and her life..........leaving the show and going back to your own life for 2 weeks, to me that isn't the way to prove that you want the girl. IMO