The Aftermath

[gurlbrit]

Originally Posted by freethinker

When you think about it, the guys spent a lot more total time together than DeAnna spent with any of them, so I'd say the other guys are probably in a much better position to get a feel for what a person is like.

If we can believe two people could actually know they're in love and ready to commit to a marriage after spending random amounts of time together spread out over only 5 weeks and 5 days - why couldn't guys who lived together almost constantly for 4 weeks know whether or not somebody seems like a decent guy?

Okay, but out of those 5 weeks and 5 days how many days did Jason spend at the Mansion. I don't want to get into it with everyone, but he got a date rose which put him at the Mansion for how many days (5 days, 7 days). I do get where you are coming from. But they only spent 5 weeks and 5 days filming, during that filming, they all had dates, they were separated for 1 on 1 dates, then at the end they had the HTD's and never met back up again until the RC's.

How well do any of us really know each other after only that short period of time? I'm not even saying Deanna is in love with Jesse after that short period of time either.

And I'm going to generalize here too (sorry any guys who are reading), how deep are guys, come on ladies, be serious how deep? Do they really look at someone they are living with (especially in a competition situation) and decide that they can or cannot trust them?

[Google]

 

[chaslom4]

Originally Posted by gurlbrit

Okay, but out of those 5 weeks and 5 days how many days did Jason spend at the Mansion. I don't want to get into it with everyone, but he got a date rose which put him at the Mansion for how many days (5 days, 7 days). I do get where you are coming from. But they only spent 5 weeks and 5 days filming, during that filming, they all had dates, they were separated for 1 on 1 dates, then at the end they had the HTD's and never met back up again until the RC's.

How well do any of us really know each other after only that short period of time? I'm not even saying Deanna is in love with Jesse after that short period of time either.

And I'm going to generalize here too (sorry any guys who are reading), how deep are guys, come on ladies, be serious how deep? Do they really look at someone they are living with (especially in a competition situation) and decide that they can or cannot trust them?

well I have to admit, I was having a hard time seeing a bunch of guys sitting around a fire talking about their feelings!

[TVJunkie1963]

Maybe DeAnna and Jesse ARE a match made in heaven.

DeAnna proclaims to the world that she's ready to settle down, 3 kids before 30, etc. etc. Then she tells Jesse on the FD that she wants 3 kids before 30....BUT...then she hesitates a second, as if to watch his reaction, then quickly adds something to the effect that her the kid schedule could be adjusted. That's NOT what she's been adamantly stating the entire season!

Then Jesse basically tells his dad on the HTD that he's not ready to get married. He then turns around and tells DeAnna a week (or two) later that he hopes she's ready to say yes, because that's where he's headed.

The things they say to each other appear to me to be nothing but what they think the other WANTS to hear, i.e., campaign strategy. Adjust the game plan to make sure the other isn't scared off.

Talk about starting off on a strong foundation! And a match made in heaven!

Yeah, I know, people's plans can change. But they're both not 18 anymore. While 26 is still very young, it's old enough to have made decisions as to the direction you want your life to head and to know what you want.

And in this case, the adjustments they are making to what they thought they wanted with their lives do not involve trivial issues - these are major, life-altering decisions with long-term repercussions. I want kids now, I don't want kids now...I don't want to get married now, I want to get married now. You DON'T make such life-changing decisions in the course of 2 or 3 weeks of reality-based TV filming.

Suffice it to say, I don't believe there will be a wedding. It's nothing more than campaign strategy to keep them both in the limelight so they won't simply vanish like all the others.

And I can't help but wonder what would happen if DeAnna puts a baking sheet in the "lid" drawer. Obviously, Jesse is obsessively organized - hope DeAnna is too. If not, she probably needs to start changing that too.

[StanleyCupCanes]

Originally Posted by HopePhoenix

Be mad at the editing but having a huge backlash about DeAnna choosing Jesse and refusing to accept or support their happiness BECAUSE of the editing or because she didn't choose your favorite is SO unfair. If their love story wasn't shown, as so many have said, then they were done as big of a disservice as well and deserve to have the support for THEM become a bigger thing than the outrage at TPTB who clearly had ulterior motives.

I think what's happened, as a result of the edit, coupled with the guys being so likeable, is the show is really no longer about her and her journey to find love to many of us. The primary draw has became the Jason/Graham/Jeremy story in their quest to find love. If the viewers like these guys more and are more invested in them, then she's going to be seen as the heartbreaker and less likeable. She's no longer the main character in her own story, thus, people care less about what happens to her and Jesse. He, too, didn't really have a starring role either. She lost her audience and likeability in some respects due to the way Fleiss chose to portray her on the screen.

[truelove]

personally I think Deanna is lin love with being in love JMO

[HopePhoenix]

Originally Posted by natashapierre

I think that, ironically, DeAnna may have actually compounded the perception problem with a Jesse ending by her repeated insistence on not "leading men on." When you apply that to Jason and Jesse, you can't help but think of Jason saying how terrible it was to be away from Ty and how he didn't know if he could handle it if it were for the whole six weeks. ...

So if she dumps him as the Final Two the audience is either going to have to figure that she really didn't fall for Jesse for sure until the very last minute (which could cast some doubt on the strength of her feelings there) or that she knew earlier but held onto *Jason* rather than the other guys, despite their being a child and father-child feelings involved. Neither of those possibilities makes for a really happy and satisfied-feeling ending, seems to me.

I think Jason also reassured DeAnna that he wanted to be there, despite knowing that he very well may not end up with her. He knew she had a strong connection with other guys there. I'm sure if she said to him that she didn't know what would happen in the end and asked if he needed to go home to be with Ty because she couldn't offer him a guarantee, he'd say he wanted to stay. He committed to the time frame when he decided to go on the show.

My personal opinion from watching is that she changed during this journey and the process (drink!) and she went in thinking she wanted to find the person who was right on paper. The good husband. Stable career man. Perfect family setting. Whatever it was to offer herself some stability and a guarantee. But then she fell for Graham, who couldn't offer her what she needed. She finally sent him home at F4 because he was scrambling her heart and her ability to see the remaining 3 clearly.

She then realized that despite how Jeremy was absolutely perfect for what she wanted, and she kept saying that and trying to convince herself. But she wasn't IN love with him. She struggled sending him home because of that. That leaves Jason and Jesse. Jesse, who from many accounts DID have the "Graham-type" chemistry with her all along, and Jason, who would be the safe choice, the perfect, attentive husband and built-in father.

Could she convince herself that she felt enough chemistry with Jason to be with him forever? Or could she convince herself to let go of her fears of not having all of her guarantees lined up, and trust Jesse with her heart? She even asked Jesse if there was room for her in his life, and you could see his fear at falling in love and her fear at not having her own version of what she'd consider a "perfect" safe forever situation.

Sometimes you think you know what you want. Like both of them thought. Jesse's fears about loving someone that much, DeAnna's trying to control her ending on paper with a checklist. And sometimes, the most beautiful things in life and love are what happen to you in spite of yourself when you're making other plans. Maybe she looked and realized he was there by her side all along.

I think it has been very interesting to watch. Because if it ends the way it sounds like it will end, then it seems she let go of what she thought she wanted, what she thought was safe, and followed her heart, her love, the butterflies, the sweetness Jesse showed her. They encouraged each other to trust and took that leap.

I for one can't wait to see that happen.

[girlsmom]

Originally Posted by natashapierre

I think that, ironically, DeAnna may have actually compounded the perception problem with a Jesse ending by her repeated insistence on not "leading men on." When you apply that to Jason and Jesse, you can't help but think of Jason saying how terrible it was to be away from Ty and how he didn't know if he could handle it if it were for the whole six weeks. ...

So if she dumps him as the Final Two the audience is either going to have to figure that she really didn't fall for Jesse for sure until the very last minute (which could cast some doubt on the strength of her feelings there) or that she knew earlier but held onto *Jason* rather than the other guys, despite their being a child and father-child feelings involved. Neither of those possibilities makes for a really happy and satisfied-feeling ending, seems to me.

I missed most of the show, but what I did see was D continually saying that she didn't want to lead anybody one, etc. Well, if that was the case she shouldn't have gone on this crazy non-romantic show because that's what it's all about. She seemed to think that she could immunize herself against criticism by repeatedly stating this and talking about how horribly difficult the rc eliminations were for her. It was a foregone conclusion in my mind that she would emerge looking like the female equivalent of a big jerk. She was naive to credit her "fans" with any lasting loyality once the roles were reversed. It only works if the nice guy with the adorable child, who btw if heavily featured in the show, is F1. After all what woman would be so cruel as to not fall in love with Ty?

[girlsmom]

Originally Posted by truelove

personally I think Deanna is lin love with being in love JMO

Who knows what will happen, but that's my opinion about the VAST majority of these seasons. They don't usually get to know the real people so well and they're all in love with finding their true love and having their love story revealed. I think Stockholm's Syndrome may work both ways too.

I don't think that Tessa saw the real HandyDandyAndy during the show. At some point she must have looked at this media hound and realized that she didn't sign up for that and dumped him. I was one to think that she was not purposely faking things, but I bet she was really confused once she got him out in real life.

[Shannonm93]

Originally Posted by librarylady

This could all be true, but would anyone really expect the casting director to say anything else? Spin, spin, spin!!!

I agree. Whenever someone like this makes a statement to the press they are always going to put the best possible spin on it no matter what. That's just what a good PR rep does.

[sassy73]

Originally Posted by freethinker

One big reservation I've always had about DeAnna is that she seemed way too focused on getting engaged right now and having a wedding. I wonder how much thought she's put into the marriage that comes after the excitement of the engagement and wedding ceremony are all over.

You think? You mean it is more than having a lavish wedding (with maybe TV cameras), the dress, the food, the ring, the music? The beautiful honey moon? The marrage won't be just about her? I somehow don't see it going that far. (and this is actually regarless of who she picks.) Although I never thought Trista and Ryan would last this long, so what do I know?