Thoughts and Comments in General #3 **Spoilers** Bachelorette 4

[n2shabbychic]

[quote=Secret;3083181;]No, I fear he will join the list of previous versions of "the one that got away" that was the "true" love story and will be brought up in this thread and others long after the final episode has aired.

QUOTE]

I know. I've never understood that. If G & De were so in love, he'd be F1. Even now, they are still NOT together and never will be. I don't see why that's not good enough for some people. If it was meant to be, it WOULD BE. Also, all of the other "ones that got away"....funny how NONE of them are now together and living happily ever after either.

I have no idea if Jason and De will live happily ever after. Maybe they will. Maybe they won't. Do I think there is a CHANCE? Yes. Do I think there is a chance for her and Graham? No. And I probably like Graham just as much as some of the other Graham fans. He was my favorite. Jason was my 2nd. I'm really rooting for Jason now as I DO see the love story and have for a long time.

[Google]

 

[Calypso]

Originally Posted by Secret

No, I fear he will join the list of previous versions of "the one that got away" that was the "true" love story and will be brought up in this thread and others long after the final episode has aired.

It's gotten to the point that conversations on this and other threads somehow always come back to Graham. He's not on the show any more, after Monday's MTA. It would be nice if we could move on, but I'm not holding my breath.

Agree! Graham is not "the one who got away", he was never "the one" in the first place.

[Auntie Lyn]

Do you think if DeAnna had kept you for a few more weeks, you would have been able to open up more?
Yeah I believe that the more time that she and I spent together the further along in the process of getting to know each other and the way we reacted to different circumstances and situations. Of course the better you get to know someone the easier it is to open up. We were moving along in that direction, it just wasn't at the speed that we both agreed upon. But definitely the longer you get to know someone the natural evolution of a relationship - yes I believe I would have opened up and she would have opened up more with each passing day.

I think the time of the process was the problem here, DeAnna on run and Graham on nice and slow.

IMHO, De needs to clear Brad out of her psyche before she can have a fulfilling relationship with any of the Bachelors.

She was deeply hurt by Brads rejection and has not come to terms with that yet, and it showed in the last scenes with Graham.

Her first words were about Brad::

De I made it perfectly clear what it was like for me the first time here

Graham Mmm hmmm

De with Brad

G yeah

De Obviously I feel like I had opened up and I had given my heart to someone who felt the same

G Mmm hmmm

De and in the end, I felt like Brad led me on! Brad broke my heart and I needed you to be open and honest and let your guard down and be there for me and right now how I feel is like I was being led on.

And then as we all know the conversation just flows on from there.

So my question is if we have those unresolved feelings about Brad, and add to that her unresolved feelings about Graham, does anyone stand a chance at a healthy relationship like she is longing for? Would Jason bring that into his son's life at this point? Is she having to change herself in order to get what she wants? Sad, so very sad. Someone on this board said it very well, only it wasn't said in a positive manner, but you shouldn't have to work that hard to be in love and be happy.

[Just Sayin]

Originally Posted by n2shabbychic

I know. I've never understood that. If G & De were so in love, he'd be F1. Even now, they are still NOT together and never will be. I don't see why that's not good enough for some people. If it was meant to be, it WOULD BE. Also, all of the other "ones that got away"....funny how NONE of them are now together and living happily ever after either.

I have no idea if Jason and De will live happily ever after. Maybe they will. Maybe they won't. Do I think there is a CHANCE? Yes. Do I think there is a chance for her and Graham? No. And I probably like Graham just as much as some of the other Graham fans. He was my favorite. Jason was my 2nd. I'm really rooting for Jason now as I DO see the love story and have for a long time.

Nice post!

I think Jason and Deanna stand a decent chance of at least exploring a relationship. Really, that should be the goal of the show, and I hope that they do. If it ends in marriage, then that is just icing on the cake. But, for now, I am just hoping for a nice, long relationship to see if Jason is Deanna's special someone, and vice versa.

[goldie2]

I am not trying to convince anyone of anything here..

It is the thoughts and Comments section...I happen to have alot of thoughts and comments about this topic which I find relavent to the continuing saga of

WILL DE CHOOSE OR WON"T SHE...

It is a perplexing thought for some here..just trying to sort it all out...

there is such little time left after all....

[luvlady345]

Originally Posted by Auntie Lyn

I think the time of the process was the problem here, DeAnna on run and Graham on nice and slow.

IMHO, De needs to clear Brad out of her psyche before she can have a fulfilling relationship with any of the Bachelors.

She was deeply hurt by Brads rejection and has not come to terms with that yet, and it showed in the last scenes with Graham.

Her first words were about Brad::

De I made it perfectly clear what it was like for me the first time here

Graham Mmm hmmm

De with Brad

G yeah

De Obviously I feel like I had opened up and I had given my heart to someone who felt the same

G Mmm hmmm

De and in the end, I felt like Brad led me on! Brad broke my heart and I needed you to be open and honest and let your guard down and be there for me and right now how I feel is like I was being led on.

And then as we all know the conversation just flows on from there.

So my question is if we have those unresolved feelings about Brad, and add to that her unresolved feelings about Graham, does anyone stand a chance at a healthy relationship like she is longing for? Would Jason bring that into his son's life at this point? Is she having to change herself in order to get what she wants? Sad, so very sad. Someone on this board said it very well, only it wasn't said in a positive manner, but you shouldn't have to work that hard to be in love and be happy.

The answer is NO........

[RacingGirl]

Originally Posted by n2shabbychic

I find it fascinating that even though you can hear the words come out of Grahams own mouth and watch his actions, add to that the fact he left at F4 (he's not even F2), that there are still people who refuse to believe he isn't in love with Deanna and she isn't in love with him. Is there anything that can convince you that they ARE telling the truth and they are not and were never truly in love? I really don't think everything is a "cover up" or edit. I actually feel kind of bad for Graham. I'm under the impression "the show" made much more out of their relationship than was actually there for the drama.

Also as much as I LOVE the sleuthing and analyzing, I think sometimes we go overboard with it because it's so fun. This isn't Lost it's just The Bachlorette. While there are tricks in editing and other things, a lot of times, things really ARE what they seem.

Originally Posted by n2shabbychic

I know. I've never understood that. If G & De were so in love, he'd be F1. Even now, they are still NOT together and never will be. I don't see why that's not good enough for some people. If it was meant to be, it WOULD BE. Also, all of the other "ones that got away"....funny how NONE of them are now together and living happily ever after either.

I have no idea if Jason and De will live happily ever after. Maybe they will. Maybe they won't. Do I think there is a CHANCE? Yes. Do I think there is a chance for her and Graham? No. And I probably like Graham just as much as some of the other Graham fans. He was my favorite. Jason was my 2nd. I'm really rooting for Jason now as I DO see the love story and have for a long time.

Nice posts, n2shabbychic! Those are spot on in my opinion! Thanks!!!

[mommyluvsnoah]

Originally Posted by Grahamgroupie

Tell that to Dee who was standing in a pool of tears watching who she believed was THE ONE leaving in the limo.

Y'all can't honestly say that if he didn't choose to go, that he wouldn't have been her choice.

I don't know if I believe that or not. It is hard to say. I think she wanted him to be the one but after seeing how the HTD went and if the FD or LCD had gone the same way then I don't know if she would have ended up choosing him in the end or not.

I don't think he wanted to be there in the end and I think she was slowly figuring that out. So no, I am not sure she would have ended up keeping him all the way.

Now if things had changed between them in a good way then yeah, probably.

ETA: And FWIW if she had chosen him as F1 I don't think it would have lasted. AFter reading Graham's interview and seeing his limo interview I just don't think the feelings were deep enough. At least not on his side.

[Just Sayin]

Originally Posted by Auntie Lyn

So my question is if we have those unresolved feelings about Brad, and add to that her unresolved feelings about Graham, does anyone stand a chance at a healthy relationship like she is longing for? Would Jason bring that into his son's life at this point? Is she having to change herself in order to get what she wants? Sad, so very sad. Someone on this board said it very well, only it wasn't said in a positive manner, but you shouldn't have to work that hard to be in love and be happy.

I don't think her saying that Brad hurt her and that she doesn't want to feel that hurt again is "unresolved feelings about Brad". It is taking something from the past, learning from it, and moving forward in life. She saw the relationship with Graham going in a similar direction, realized it, and moved on. Not unresolved issues, but learning from past mistakes and not letting them happen again.

I don't necessarily think it was really all about Brad or Graham, but rather about the type of guys she is usually attracted to that leave her broken hearted and empty handed. Brad just happens to be the "one of those" that Graham would know the most about, as he has been talked about a lot this season (by TPTB more than anyone). It was about leaving the type of guy who never cared enough about her to even ask her about why her Mom was so important in her life, leaving those "types" behind, and moving forward to more healthy and fulfilling relationships.

[Grahamgroupie]

Originally Posted by Auntie Lyn

I think the time of the process was the problem here, DeAnna on run and Graham on nice and slow.

IMHO, De needs to clear Brad out of her psyche before she can have a fulfilling relationship with any of the Bachelors.

She was deeply hurt by Brads rejection and has not come to terms with that yet, and it showed in the last scenes with Graham.

Her first words were about Brad::

De I made it perfectly clear what it was like for me the first time here

Graham Mmm hmmm

De with Brad

G yeah

De Obviously I feel like I had opened up and I had given my heart to someone who felt the same

G Mmm hmmm

De and in the end, I felt like Brad led me on! Brad broke my heart and I needed you to be open and honest and let your guard down and be there for me and right now how I feel is like I was being led on.

And then as we all know the conversation just flows on from there.

So my question is if we have those unresolved feelings about Brad, and add to that her unresolved feelings about Graham, does anyone stand a chance at a healthy relationship like she is longing for? Would Jason bring that into his son's life at this point? Is she having to change herself in order to get what she wants? Sad, so very sad. Someone on this board said it very well, only it wasn't said in a positive manner, but you shouldn't have to work that hard to be in love and be happy.

The "logical" answer is no, but there are going to be those that will force a scenario to fit with their thinking.