Behind the Edit **SPOILERS**

[Bonbonlover]

A few thoughts before going to the outburst. … Graham filled the pot. Robert stirred it. And D didn’t like the ingredients.

WOW!! PiperMaru what an incredible job you have done!! Thanks so much for the transcript, it really helps to read what is going on and not get sidetracked by their abs...

[Google]

 

[beader]

Piper, thanks soooo much--awesome work!

Here's what I saw that somehow didn't dawn on me Monday night.
The marquee reads: Jesse. One night only… just for you. Love Deanna

Doesn't that sound like, "OK, I'm giving you one night (just one) because I think you're a nice guy"?

[Mike'sgirl]

Thanks Piper you really are amazing!
on the comment made by Graham - am I wrong in my interpretation of what he meant when he said "but it was good to know that seeing you like that caused me pain."
That he was really trying to say: .,....it was good for me to know that I felt pain because my action hurt you. (in other words: my watching you in pain and knowing that I was the cause of it, caused me to suffer also.)????

[WeezerTheGeezer]

Wow! Super impressive! We should pay you!
Thank you so very much for all the hard work you've put into this.

[PiperMaru]

Originally Posted by Mike'sgirl

Thanks Piper you really are amazing!
on the comment made by Graham - am I wrong in my interpretation of what he meant when he said "but it was good to know that seeing you like that caused me pain."
That he was really trying to say: .,....it was good for me to know that I felt pain because my action hurt you. (in other words: my watching you in pain and knowing that I was the cause of it, caused me to suffer also.)????

Hi MG! No. I completely agree with you. I think that was entirely Graham's meaning. The phrasing was just odd. I think to the casual viewer it might've sounded harsh. And upon first listen it just struck me funny. But ITA, I think he geniunely felt bad about causing her hurt but in a sense it was a test for him in gauging his feelings for her.

[Lifeisgood2]

Piper, what can I say other than BRAVO! Thanks so much for the transcript.

[JoLena]

Originally Posted by chrisg

Words are one thing but a person's actions show you who they are and what they're about. I don't know a single guy who is officially pushing 30 and has never even had a six month relationship. Not a single one! You have to do some serious work to avoid it at that age, IMO. And didn't he say that the five month relationship was only just recently? What was the average duration of his relationships before that? In the dozen or so years from teenage dating age to the age of 28?

You seem to have some idealized notion of him as this shy, retiring, deeply profound soul that just hasn't met the ONE and is deeply scarred by the realization that there is actually competition on this show. And yet none of his other ventures in life--from the basketball to investing in bars to moving to NYC (this is from a fellow New Yorker by the way)--back up his being shy or afraid of competition in the slightest.

And the behavior he is demonstrating on the show only reinforces that he is a person who is not risk averse in general but avoids opportunities for intimacy and relationship building with women. That is what I have seen of Graham play out before me. And plenty of guys have gone on this show TALKING about finding their soulmate and being ready to settle down with the ONE. Does the name Jesse Palmer ring a bell?

I like Graham and think he's a great guy that will make a good husband some day--just not any time soon.

Sounds just like Brad to me. She seems to gravitate to these type of men. I hope she wises up for her own good. IMo Graham is too much like Brad, looks, eyes, hair coloring, bar owner.

[dodie430]

Originally Posted by emusha

you have good points, I don't deny...BUT IMO I doubt he's shy or afraid of competition. Though from what he says and does I think he has difficulty expressing himself verbally and he is insecure about how De feels about him as compared to other guys.
there are many reasons he may not have had long relationships
1. he was living and working in germany focusing on basket ball
2. has led an athletic life and had limited time that he can commit to a relationship
3. he may not be allowing himself to take things father with someone if he knows that they are not 'the one' - that's just a matter of being true to himself
4. he'd had to move around a lot for bball

on the other hand:
- he has expressed a desire to find love and for marriage. I don't think we can make a judgment call on his personality as a commitment-phobe just from what we have seen. JMO

Just to preface my post - I don't consider Graham a 'Commitment-Phobe", I'm just not sure he has developed the skills or desire to maintain a long term relationship to this point.

But as far as his ball being a reason he hasn't committed, there are plenty of pro athletes with wives, girlfriends, and families. It can be hard, but what isn't these days? I do find it odd that he hasn't been in a serious relationship longer than 5 months at his age. No one really knows what the reasoning is, but coupled with the way he keeps reeling DeAnna in and throwing her back - I think she'd be remiss if she didn't at least consider these things warning signs. Alot of uncertainty there.

[lyb5007]

Wow! Piper, What an incredible job! Thank you so much for all the time and work you put into the transcription. Your interpretations and reactions are priceless! This and the BLF are my favorite threads, now. I see a totally different show when I go back and watch again after reading them.

[loving_socal07]

Originally Posted by lyb5007

Wow! Piper, What an incredible job! Thank you so much for all the time and work you put into the transcription. Your interpretations and reactions are priceless! This and the BLF are my favorite threads, now. I see a totally different show when I go back and watch again after reading them.

It took me awhile to read the whole transcript, but what a job well done, piper!