Jef - Bachelorette 8

[AlwaysVeg]

Also, these men have a lot of down time.....sitting around unable to leave their hotels. They have a lot of time to think about their past dates and future ones. They have time to really think about what they want to say, how they are going to say it and rehearse it in their heads. I'm not suspicious about them being smooth.....since most of what they say is well thought out. Plus, we don't know if they stumbled and were asked to "take two" by the producers.

Funny, because I think this is something that women do much moreso than men. Most men are not that introspective (and that's from getting male opinions, not just my opinion, about what men think about and do). They're thinking more about wanting to beat out the other guy, sports, the woman's physical attractiveness, how horny they are, what they can do to amuse themselves while they're waiting, etc. I really don't think they're fretting about how they're going to say stuff and rehearsing it.

[Mikesgirl83]

I'd never believe someone really loved me if I knew they had been handed a script and directions for what to say and how to portray themselves and their feelings. But maybe that's just me.

You're also not on a "reality show" you don't think Emily is being directed or scripted at times? Or Arie? Jef is a nice guy, he's smart, he;s handsome and successful, I'm pretty sure that makes him a winner

[Alexxxx]

Funny, because I think this is something that women do much moreso than men. Most men are not that introspective (and that's from getting male opinions, not just my opinion, about what men think about and do). They're thinking more about wanting to beat out the other guy, sports, the woman's physical attractiveness, how horny they are, what they can do to amuse themselves while they're waiting, etc. I really don't think they're fretting about how they're going to say stuff and rehearsing it.

Why fret when you've got the internet?

[AlwaysVeg]

I would never be on a reality show because I know how phony this is, and I could never be phony enough to pretend I'm on the show to find true and lasting love! I'm sure Emily is being directed just like every other lead has been, but she seems to be calling the shots more than any other in the show's history, too. I really have no idea if Jef is nice or smart because all I see is a scripted version of Jef.

[KatesMom]

I would never be on a reality show because I know how phony this is, and I could never be phony enough to pretend I'm on the show to find true and lasting love! I'm sure Emily is being directed just like every other lead has been, but she seems to be calling the shots more than any other in the show's history, too. I really have no idea if Jef is nice or smart because all I see is a scripted version of Jef.

Very, very true. We are seeing a scripted version of all of them. Might mean he is a jerk in real life. Might mean he is a really nice guy. We don't know. I don't hold it against him that he sounds scripted on a scripted show. They all do. Only time will tell who the real Jef, or Arie, or Emily, is.

[JavaJo]

Funny, because I think this is something that women do much moreso than men. Most men are not that introspective (and that's from getting male opinions, not just my opinion, about what men think about and do). They're thinking more about wanting to beat out the other guy, sports, the woman's physical attractiveness, how horny they are, what they can do to amuse themselves while they're waiting, etc. I really don't think they're fretting about how they're going to say stuff and rehearsing it.

I know guys who are very introspective. There are men out there who can write a better love letter than I ever could. I'm married to one. Truth is, we don't know these guys so we don't know that they only think about sports and sex. I think that's a myth anyway, for the most part. I'm also sure that since Emily has been on the flip side of this, she's aware of how the it all works.

[AlwaysVeg]

Even though Emily has been a contestant on this show, I bet she gets caught up in the bubble, too. They all do. Look at all the poor final choices the leads historically have made, except for 2 or 3 exceptions that miraculously worked out. Weeks and months later, they start to sort it all out. That's why the vast majority of these relationships don't last when everyday relationship reality sets in. I like what Steve Harvey says about men ... and of course there are exceptions, with some men being more introspective than most ... and how their needs and desires and what they want from a relationship are much simpler than they are for women. But ... this would be getting more philosophical, sociological, and OT!

[Mikesgirl83]

If we don't know who the real Jef is then it's really not fair to make all these assumptions about him and call him a " loser" don't you think?

[AlwaysVeg]

If we don't know who the real Jef is then it's really not fair to make all these assumptions about him and call him a " loser" don't you think?

Are you addressing me? I didn't call him a loser.

[ilja]

I've been thinking lately that the real them is probably more portrayed by what we don't see on camera anyway. Just like someone mentioned that somebody that knows Emily says she isn't like what we are seeing. I do believe they get to know each other after spending so much time cloistered with each other but it's more from their behavior while the cameras aren't rolling. I just think like in any relationship it takes time to get over that infatuation period where everyone is on their best behavior. Not to mention that someone else is in control of so much of what they can and cannot do during this trip.

I do hope they have some real moments and some real emotions. I don't believe these folks are that good of actors to fool us completely. But then again, what do I know?

I'm going back to iljaland and pretending that even if these lines were pre-written, not all of them were. I want to keep enjoying this show and suspect that someone is going to be in big time trouble for these recent gotcha lines.