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Thread: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

  1. #21
    FORT Fogey sonyab1974's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by TVDude;3814935;
    but what if you get married and your partner finds out you don't enjoy it much or you're not very good at it, then what? You can't call it mulligans and move on can you? Do you really want to buy the car before test driving it? I sure wouldn't.
    You learn. You learn from each other. You find out what you both like.. You buy books. You get help with that. There is help you know. It's called sexology.

  2. #22
    FORT Fogey sonyab1974's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by surpriseending;3814986;
    I was also a virgin until marriage and people who need to "test drive" their partner for his/her physical aspects supersede the meaning of what is sex in marriage. It's not just about one's own self and satisfaction. Sex is the topping on the cake and shouldn't be the focus of whether a relationship breaks or not. Expressing oneself fully through sex, is an expression of deep love for the person vowed to. But if marriage is not something to be upheld over the long-term, I can see why sex would be more of a focus than an intense, deep and meaningful, long-term relationship would be. The sex my husband and I have is indescribable and is rooted not on a superficial expectation but on our love for just each other. We have that bond that brings our marriage even closer.

    I totally respect someone like Corrie and especially nowadays where sexual diseases fly rampant and people simply don't tell, I think it's more than worth it to save yourself until the right person is there. A person doesn't think of the consequences until it hits them and their whole family, too.

    Yes!!! Amen! I agree with you 100% with you.

  3. #23
    FORT Fogey sonyab1974's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by Can't Look Away;3814990;
    The thing that amazed me about tonight's show is that Jake revealed that he is STILL relying on that bungee jump with Vienna as the basis for their relationship. Because he was weak and she held him, he thinks she will be strong for him in everything else, too. But come on! The girl isn't strong enough to sit on a couch for 30 minutes and wait for him!
    Is he?!!?! Yikes! And yeah she was so impatient waiting for him.. And she had to go find him when he was with Gia on that date.

  4. #24
    Wild thang Rattus's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by TVDude;3814935;
    Its fine if you want to wait for your first love for sex, but what if you get married and your partner finds out you don't enjoy it much or you're not very good at it, then what? You can't call it mulligans and move on can you? Do you really want to buy the car before test driving it? I sure wouldn't.
    Agreed. I just couldn't (well actually, I can) imagine the hell of being trapped in a marriage with someone I was physically incompatible with - and you don't always "learn along with your partner" sexually. Sometimes your partner is just no good at all in that respect (says someone who had to get married a second time to get it right). Sex is just as important as all those values issues people rabbit on about, and compatability is a must.
    All I wanted was a 45, a stinking 45 - the record or the gun. I'd even settle for the damn malt liquor. - Al Bundy.

  5. #25
    Christian,Mom,Teacher mom2's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    You can test your chemistry out without taking off clothes or grinding bodies together.

    When a woman tells a man that another woman has been bragging about being a spoiled little daddy's girl, always bailed out and cars/etc. replaced without consequences, that man needs to listen because who does he think she expects to take her daddy's place in treating her this way??? Why doesn't he question Vienna about how her daddy treats her, then lay down what reality with him would be and watch for her reaction. That was one expensive bungee jump.
    "Quotes on the internet may not be accurate." - Abraham Lincoln

  6. #26
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    I think Vienna balances Jake. He's like a shy little kid sometimes. She's kind of daring and modern. So I see the attraction. Opposites attract.
    Bless Corrie's heart. I don't think she's a virgin but just that she is currently waiting. That wasn't clear but I don't care to know either. I do think she is being unrealistic. But that is her right to be unrealistic. I think it is really self-limiting as "physicality" is a part of most grown-up relationships. I don't think anyone should have to sacrifice their values for someone else but sometimes re-evaluating what is meaningful to you is necessary. I don't think there is anything wrong with deciding that losing a bit of morality is worth finding love.

  7. #27
    now I'm smilingmomof4!!!! smilingmomof3's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    I totally and completely respect Corrie and admire her honesty on national TV. Not an easy thing to stand up for your values like that. Good for her! I think she is being wise and probably sparing herself a good deal of pain and hurt. A good man who really loves her and shares her value system will be fine with waiting. It's a good way to find out what a guy is all about. I think Corrie will find a keeper. It might take a little while, but the wait will be worth it. I don't think any woman should ever sacrifice herself or her values just to keep a man interested or gratified sexually. Obviously, marriage involves a great deal of giving in all areas, but dating is dating. So many women find themselves overly invested in a man who is just playing them. Sex does not always equal love to a man. However, marriage and waiting for sex usually do equal love to a man.
    ***"It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages" - Nietzsche *** "A woman who strives to be equal to a man is lacking in ambition"***

  8. #28
    FORT Fanatic hikari's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    Hi FORTers! I've been away for awhile but I'm back! Last night was my first episode of this season's Bachelor and what a doozy it was! I remember following all episodes of the first seasons of Bachelor and Bachelorette, but Jake P. kinda reminded me why I tuned out for so long.

    I have to wonder long and hard about how come a successful, handsome 31-year-old professional guy with a great job would have to go on a TV show to meet women. Is there something wrong with him, or is he just a playa? Because he claims that he winnowed the field to the 'best 5' girls and this is the 'best' according to his values, apparently: three 23-year-old blondes, a 25 year old blonde, divorced, and the 'oldest' in the field, a whopping 26 year old who makes up for her advanced age by being a swimsuit model. I'm assuming he ditched any of the more accomplished, more age-appropriate women early on. Guess our boy Jake is not going to be confused with Capt. Sully Sulllenberger anytime soon!

    And this is why none of our Bachelors have found Lasting Love . . . they aren't in it for "lasting love'. They are in it for an all-expenses paid champagne fueled hot tub orgy. Somehow I don't think that the oh-so-ready-for-marriage Vienna is going to wind up as Jake's bride. Or any of them. This guy is paid to carry people's lives in his hands? Based on his decision making here, I don't think I'd want to be on one of Jake's flights. Cause he seems kinda like a himbo to me.

  9. #29
    FORT Fanatic hikari's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by TVDude;3814560;
    Corrie the virgin is going to be let go I think.

    All for the best. I respect her stance; I think 23 is way too young to be super experienced with men, when one is fresh out of school and just getting a career started. Kudos to her for not caving in on her values, though it's quizzical why such a morally conservative girl would choose to audition for a show like this in the first place. Surely she had to know that she would be put in uncomfortable and potentially compromising situations.

    Now Vienna never met an uncomfortable situation that compromised her! I think rather that she creates discomfort and compromise wherever she goes. In contrast to Corrie, Vienna seems to have PLENTY of experience, like maybe with the whole brother frat to whichever sorority she just exited a few months ago. But I chalk up a lot of her behavior to being only 23 and on national television. What is more confounding is why somebody like Jake, a considerably older man established in his career and presumably looking for someone to be the mother of his kids would find her SO attractive that he'd ditch many more compatible contenders for her. So yeah, she's 23 and blonde, which I guess answers my own question. His mama will be thrilled to meet her, I bet. Jake's choices to keep and discard certain people don't really speak too well of his substance as a person, IMO.

  10. #30
    FORT Fogey Duckyface's Avatar
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    Re: 2/01 Show Discussion **spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by Can't Look Away;3814990;
    The thing that amazed me about tonight's show is that Jake revealed that he is STILL relying on that bungee jump with Vienna as the basis for their relationship. Because he was weak and she held him, he thinks she will be strong for him in everything else, too. But come on! The girl isn't strong enough to sit on a couch for 30 minutes and wait for him!
    When you go through a frightening experience together it bonds you to the person. The intense situation and the hormones released by fear make you feel close to that person. I think the producers know this and used the situation to try to create feelings between Vienna and Jake.

    It's too bad Jake doesn't realize it.

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