Misogyny 101: why do WOMEN help produce and watch this show?

[jelle]

kultainen .... yes I was referring to your comments, and I got it. I agree with your comparison. I just poorly referenced you comments in order to use it as a starting place to jump start the thread again. I enjoy this kind of discussion and think it is necessary when so many of us are adicted to this show.

So, I was analogyzing that on these boards, and even on the show itself, women are judging other women more harshly. While the men, whose conduct is really the issue, skate by.

What I was pointing out is that historically men escape blame in situations by getting women to turn on each other rather than on them.

With full knowledge of the unreality of what we are seeing, so many get so emotionally invested in the story or a character. Then when the story takes a jog, those same characters are blasted in their real life when nothing we have been watching is their real life, but a creation of a "very astute businessman."

If this were a movie, we would see character development and be given the developing story to explain the ending. Even if the ending were the same, the hero would be exonerated and the love story confirmed. Since the purpose is not to give us a love story but a dramatic thriller to attract weekly viewers, waht we see is different. Same story different presentation.

My question is: after all these years, WHY are we still falling into the same trap? Wishful thinking? or is there some progression from the search, discovery phase to the personal investment phase?

[spunk]

Did anyone watch the Oscars? Well, again this year one of the esteemed Hollywood actors went on a rant about how Hollywood has once again saved America from itself. His assertion was that Hollywood is the cure for all of the racist, bigoted, and biased problems in America. Hollywood has saved us all. As long as by all you mean men.
I sat there wondering if the blowhard actor realized the social area that Hollywood has placed women in from the very beginning of pictures to current releases. Women to be even remotely successful must be extremely attractive. Fat,ugly, plain male actors always get the girl. when is that ever reversed? NEVER.
Hollywoood and the world cheer when America elects a black president. But where is the outrage about there not being a female in the White House? When will Hollywood understand the effect they are having on young girls? Females obtained the right to vote 70 years after white mans slaves obtained the right to vote. Think about it, white man gave his possessions the right to vote 70 years before white man gave his mother, daughter and sister the same right.
I am not shocked girls fill their chests with silicone. I am not shocked they put botulism in their lips. I am not shocked they starve themselves nutritionally to fit in the elusive size zero. I am shocked that no one understands why.

I have always found the fact the the USA which is far more progressive than a lot of countries in the middle east, south america and other regions of the world where womens rights are null in comparison to this country has failed to produce a female president. I think the fact that a great deal of countries like Pakistan, India, Argentina, Chile, the Phillipines just to name a few, where the Machista mentality is strong and alive even today, have already produced woman leaders. This is to me an interesting Paradox.

[CarlyNTSO]

No one goes on this show to find the love of her/his life.

Sadly, I think they do. But if you read Awareness, by Anthony DeMello, much can be applied here.

"You are never in love with anyone. you're only in love with your prejudiced and hopeful idea of that person. Isn't that how you fall out of love? Your idea changes, doesn't it?" --from the book

[twochicklets]

I have a 10 year old daughter, who watched Deanna's season with me and watched Jason's up until the proposal, when she went to sleep. I used to use some of the Bachelor situations as conversation starters about relationships and life in general. Mostly about good and bad behaviors. This morning I told her that she would not be watching this franchise any longer. There are alot of things I don't want my 10 year old viewing. A fickle man that hops from one "serious" relationship to another flippantly in particular. When I told my 10 year old what happened after she went to bed, her newly jaded thought process came up with this question for me: Mommy, is American Idol fake also?
So, while I watch for entertainment, my child was watching for romance, learned about the sham that is reality t.v., and now is questioning other shows. Good or bad, for what it is worth.

[madlyophelia]

Fascinating thread, which I've just perused, on one of my favorite subjects: misogyny. But the question is not why women produce the show (their jobs, the money), but why this is popular entertainment among women.

The Bachelor is and always has been, even in it's weaker rated seasons, one of the highest rated shows among women 18-34. It is, even in this higher rated season, fourth in it's time period among men 18-34. The Bachelor is the equivalent of a sport for young women.

Why wouldn't women prefer to watch a Bachelorette with 25 buff boys? I know I do. It isn't entertainment to me to watch scantily clad women with ginormous implants have cat fights.

The show is completely structured to be viewed by male eyes, yet women accept this and watch it. Women accept the retreaded Bachelorettes, because someone has convinced us that it is important that the chosen woman be sympathetic. Is that standard applied to the men selected as TB? Are the producers of this show not capable of selecting a completely new Bachelorette who could be a fan fav?

Or is the reality that they would be unable to find enough men to be TB(ette)'s suitors because most men wouldn't want to do this show?

[jelle]

I have always questioned the different standards for men and women participants. Why is it that the bar is set so low for the heroette?
Our heros must not only be buff dudes, but be zillionairs, successful businessmen or athletes (no matter how pseudo), charming, and of course committed to finding true love as evidenced by the requisite proposal.
Heroettes so far have had no careers, no particular talents, no net worth in the asset column, not terribly charming on the whole, and as long as they are cute and sympathetic characters from being someone's dumpee, they are hired Trista was a cheerleader and hygenist, Mer was a model and wannabe chef, Jen was someone's assistant, Deanna was a bartender and newbie "realtor." Jillian will be the first with a career that seems to be successful.

[kultainen]

Fascinating thread, which I've just perused, on one of my favorite subjects: misogyny. But the question is not why women produce the show (their jobs, the money), but why this is popular entertainment among women.



Why wouldn't women prefer to watch a Bachelorette with 25 buff boys? I know I do. It isn't entertainment to me to watch scantily clad women with ginormous implants have cat fights.

The show is completely structured to be viewed by male eyes, yet women accept this and watch it. Women accept the retreaded Bachelorettes, because someone has convinced us that it is important that the chosen woman be sympathetic. Is that standard applied to the men selected as TB? Are the producers of this show not capable of selecting a completely new Bachelorette who could be a fan fav?

Or is the reality that they would be unable to find enough men to be TB(ette)'s suitors because most men wouldn't want to do this show?

It's a great question and I've thought a lot about it. Somehow it all comes down to that difference between the id and the ego..what we know should be but what we still believe "is". In simple terms: I consider myself in all respects in theory free of all the residuals of Sister St. Susan et. al. in Catholic school, but on occasion, especially in reactive situations, I find that, sadly, I am not. That voice is still very much in my ear. So, as much as we often think of ourselves as strong, independent, equals who can ask the guy out, even live without one...there is that voice in our ear that says sleep until the prince wakes you up with a kiss.

[beachgirl4]

I have always questioned the different standards for men and women participants. Why is it that the bar is set so low for the heroette?
Our heros must not only be buff dudes, but be zillionairs, successful businessmen or athletes (no matter how pseudo), charming, and of course committed to finding true love as evidenced by the requisite proposal.
Heroettes so far have had no careers, no particular talents, no net worth in the asset column, not terribly charming on the whole, and as long as they are cute and sympathetic characters from being someone's dumpee, they are hired Trista was a cheerleader and hygenist, Mer was a model and wannabe chef, Jen was someone's assistant, Deanna was a bartender and newbie "realtor." Jillian will be the first with a career that seems to be successful.

This is really interesting - I never even considered this.

[beachgirl4]

Why wouldn't women prefer to watch a Bachelorette with 25 buff boys? I know I do. It isn't entertainment to me to watch scantily clad women with ginormous implants have cat fights.

The show is completely structured to be viewed by male eyes, yet women accept this and watch it. Women accept the retreaded Bachelorettes, because someone has convinced us that it is important that the chosen woman be sympathetic. Is that standard applied to the men selected as TB? Are the producers of this show not capable of selecting a completely new Bachelorette who could be a fan fav?

I, for one, do prefer the Bachelorette versions but I think the idea of the fairly-tale romance is one reason so many women watch. Because the 'goal' of the show is a proposal, I don't see this as having great appeal for men. Yes, the idea of having 25 women competing for them is probably a fantasy most guys would entertain, but wiht a different goal entirely. I really enjoyed that we were spared the cat fights for the most part this season.

[h2omom611]

Trista was actually an occupational therapist, which requires a 4 year degree and additional 3 years of grad school to get certified. Jenn was an event planner in Chicago. Although not brain surgeons, I think these both sound like admirable careers.