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Thread: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

  1. #21
    the sweetest thing snickers's Avatar
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    i question just how hurt either girl really is, hurt ego yes, but a hurting heart? i'm not at all convinced

    they play a game too, everyone has a role to play in this farce of a show

    jenni is back with an ex, watch, next week deanna will have a new boyfriend

    all these lines are scripted, could brad be the typical jerk who says all the right things and break hearts in the end? possibly, but ABC picked him, i kind of think he was scripted to say those things, just like the ladies were scripted to say how hurt they are

  2. #22
    FORT Fogey fan*addict's Avatar
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by Mysteryhunt;2683221;
    For me the outcome isn't the major issue it's the presentation.

    Good point...

    For me...I felt "cheated" of an ending seeing one of the couples at least TRY to attmept a relationship outside the "bachelor" world. !

    I wish the best for the b'ettes (may they find a MAN worthy of their love) and our dear Brad, (may he find a good counselor)

    Thus, in the end as much as we want REAL in our REALITY TV..truth be told it was tough to swallow!

    Till January when we can begin sluthing the next poor souls....enjoy your life

  3. #23
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    I believe the show itself is scripted to some extent. I do not believe that the ATFR show was scripted and I don't think Mr. Charm had a clue how pathetic his rationale sounded.

    I also realize that the women play too. But to claim that Brad stuck it to ABC because he didn't play is no more correct than saying that there can be only one way to play this game.

    I think he did do the right thing by making a clean break if he didn't have a "connection" (ugh - hate that word in this context). But he did not have to repeatedly say how much he cares about them, and still does, and touching them, and thinking about them daily, and talking marriage and toilet seats and, oh, by the way, don't worry about Saturday. It will be a good day. Define good, Brad. That day could have been good only to the warped and dysfunctional.

  4. #24
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    Hi All
    I found your boards during the Andy show because I was impressed by Tessa and hoped she would win. You are a very mature and kind group here unlike other sites. Like some of you I was disappointed with Andy afterwards. My wife started me watching the show and when the next one started We kept watching because I recognized some of Brad's shyness being like that myself.
    Then I spotted Jenni and was rooting for her to win. By the end I could hardly watch because I didn't want to see her cry, and when she was let down my heart broke for her, and I was very sorry for Deanna also. I am glad that Jenni moved on , she seems like the sweetest, kindest woman. I don't intend to get into something like this again but might lurk again sometime, there are more important things to do.

    Good luck everyone

  5. #25
    the sweetest thing snickers's Avatar
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    oh come on, ABC i think is a little ticked, has there ever been a one hour finale before? dont think so

    that's sticking it to them

  6. #26
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    Given the high breakup rate of this show, I don't think Brad erred by not giving either girl a chance to get to know him better. Sometimes you just know that a person isn't right for you.

    I wonder how many of the women every season are cast solely for their caricature personalities with no regard to compatibility. If they were serious about matchmaking they would let the bachelor select the final 25 from a much larger field, or perhaps give him unlimited say in all stages of casting. The flip side of that is to announce who the bachelor is before casting, which I think they did one season.

    The other thing I don't like about the show is the pressure it puts on the cast to have sex and get engaged. I wonder if Brad just got sick of the phoniness and snapped at the end.

  7. #27
    Melissa Melissa&Spencer's Avatar
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    My final thoughts are Bachelor 11 sucked!

  8. #28
    Crazy Shutterbug Harmony2000's Avatar
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    To me every season has gotten worse and this one topped them all. When I first saw the promos, I had such high hopes for this season. And then he spoke and I started to fear that this would turn out to be a horrible season and completely understood why most of the promos didn't have him saying a word.

    One thing I have always disliked about this show is the way they pretend its about finding a wife at the end of it.. please.. its about the booty calls on the over night dates. A free pass to be a player and kiss as many girls as you want while you get the undivided attention of a bunch of squealing, giggling girls. Its a guys dream (well the sort of guy that would go on this show).

    I'm not sure I'm watching the next one.

    Can we just go right into a Bachelorette instead?

    Or how about we ditch the whole fake romance aspect and call it what it really is so the viewers aren't left feeling like they were the ones played when the ending doesn't pan out as "promised" by the editor and previews? (And that's my final thoughts on this season... that I was played and I'm not happy about it)

  9. #29
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    As a therapist, I've long had thoughts as to why "The Bachelor" can't seem to produce a successful long-term relationship ending in marriage. I believe it all comes down to how competition and conquest play out in the show.

    Males typically have a need to compete, particularly when it comes to romance. Men love the thrill of the chase--it makes them willing to do all sorts of crazy things in order to "win" the heart of the woman they (think they) love. Remove the thrill of the chase, and there's almost nothing left. It's a rare man who values a woman who is too "easy to get."

    "The Bachelor," by its very design, is all about 25 women competing for the attention of one man. Given basic human nature, it's a recipe for romantic disaster. First, the producers start with a man who is already used to attention, usually for both his looks and his money (and/or position). Then they make him the center of attention, creating an atmosphere where normally self-respecting women are forced to compete to make an impression on him. They turn the tables completely. Suddenly, there's no thrill of the chase at all. Rather, the man has to practically fend off all sorts of gorgeous women throwing themselves at him.

    Is it any wonder that several of the bachelors have gravitated (I'd say "taken refuge in") the women who seemed at least a little more hard to get?

    And no matter how well-grounded the man might be when this "process" starts, he almost can't help but believe his own press by the end of the show. So even when he finally settles on his favorite, he has absorbed the notion that he's something truly special, worthy of all that competition. How is any one woman--no matter how much of a perfect goddess she may be--ever going to satisfy his now completely overblown ego?

    This show, as I said, has every componant for romantic disaster.

    However, reverse roles (as in "The Bachelorette"), and you have a workable formula. The male's natural drive to compete for a woman's attention plays out 25-fold in "The Bachelorette." That explains why Ryan Sutter still seems to think he won some sort of "prize" in Trista. It's why "The Bachelorette" was the only one of these shows that produced a marriage.

  10. #30
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    Re: Final Thoughts on Bachelor 11

    Oh my first post. I lurked through half of last season and all of this and have been VERY impressed with this board. The funniest recaps, the best sleuthers and some very good insights. Most of the time I didn't need to say anything because someone else said it for me.

    This time I have a little extra insight no one else has mentioned. Poor Deana. She could not understand why this man lavished such attention and affection on her and then at crunch time, turned it all off like a light switch. Gone, just like that. I gave my heart totally to a man like that and was nearly destroyed by his behavior. Why Why Why... until you understand you cannot move on. If anyone has any connections, please tell Deanna and the others to go to the nearest library or bookstore and get a book called "Men Who Can't Love". My therapist gave it to me. It describes commitmentphobes. Not ordinary, garden variety jerks, asses and so on. Truly phobic people who react to commitment with frantic terror... like a claustrophobe in a cave. Once their phobia is triggered, they panic and want out of the "cave" like someone fleeing a fire. No sense of anyone but themselves. At that moment when the phobia kicks in, all feelings are supressed and it becomes all about fear and self preservation. BRAD is identical in behavior to the man I knew. Read the book, you will recognize him immediately. The praise, the attention, saying all the right things in a believable way,right up to the moment you surrender to it and respond "I love you too". And then BAM. It vanishes faster than you can say "why?". It's a true phobia and requires therapy. The cute thing about this type of man is that once the pressure is off and he's safely distant, he starts to come back and repeat the whole thing again. Deanna's willingness to give Brad a second chance is also typical of what happens when you get involved with a commitment phobe. The cycle repeats, only over a shorter time. It can continue repeating with a woman who never figures out what is happening. I was so devastated I got therapy, and I read the book. When my phobic guy came around again several months later, I handed him a copy of the book I'd bought for him, told him to read it and get therapy. Like Brad, he knew something was "off" about him and he DID recognize himself and he did go for therapy. And then he promptly found a new girlfriend.
    Meet a guy like this and you are safest if you RUN, not walk, as far as you can get from him.
    I hope someone sends Deanna the book. It will answer her questions. I recognized what Brad was in those last 3 episodes. Yes he can look mean if cornered, can't he? He's phobic and he wants to get out of the situation immediately if not faster.
    When everything dies down, Deana, even Jenni may hear from him again. My advice? Hang up. and find a better man.

    That said, I am sick of Bachelors, as the previous poster mentioned, it's a pyschological recipe for disaster. Let's have a Bachlorette instead and make these guys work for it! I hated this season.

    Oh and boy was it lame-o for ABC to parade Trista & Ryan, Mary & Byron on the ATFR to look better. Tho it WAS great to see them again. Byron is the only bachelor I ever found attractive LOL, the rest were never my type. He's gained weight which no doubt means he is in happy husband mode... hee hee.

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