Since last week, our relations with Uncle Vincenzo have suffered a serious setback. It seems he wasn't
getting enough cashhappy with our arrangement any longer and decided to threaten our healthterminate our association. Other events have also contributed to Uncle Vincenzo's displeasure, such as Mario's secret midnight rendezvous with Bettina behind he pool housecertain indiscretions on Mario's part, which he was unwilling to overlook. While we were quite content to escape with all our limbs still attachedleave things be, we feared that obtaining the Bachelorette diaries this week was going to be a Herculean task.
Our luck turned when an anonymous benefactor
Mario's cousin, Elvira, maid at the Cabo Bachelorette hotelcontacted us to offer a mutually beneficial arrangement: We get our hands on the diaries and our nameless contributor gets a big pile of cashto bask in our gratitude and gets to privately savor the fruits of her briberyglory of her accomplishment. We are eternally grateful to this shameless extortionist and spyunique visionary and thank her from the bottom of our hearts for her generosity.
Disclaimer: We cannot prove with any certainty that these were in fact written by the bachelorettes. For all we know,
Elviraour secret source is also an extremely talented creative writer who penned these diaries during her lunch hour.
Thanks to contributing FORT writers and moderators : Yardgnome, AJane, lildago, roseskid, MsFroggy, AshleyPSU, marybethp, MotherSister, Marleybone, Mariner, speedbump, PhoneGrrrl, and Amanda.