The Bachelorette Diaries - Part 5: Sub-rosa in Cabo

[MsFroggy]

Since last week, our relations with Uncle Vincenzo have suffered a serious setback. It seems he wasn't getting enough cash happy with our arrangement any longer and decided to threaten our health terminate our association. Other events have also contributed to Uncle Vincenzo's displeasure, such as Mario's secret midnight rendezvous with Bettina behind he pool house certain indiscretions on Mario's part, which he was unwilling to overlook. While we were quite content to escape with all our limbs still attached leave things be, we feared that obtaining the Bachelorette diaries this week was going to be a Herculean task.

Our luck turned when an anonymous benefactor Mario's cousin, Elvira, maid at the Cabo Bachelorette hotel contacted us to offer a mutually beneficial arrangement: We get our hands on the diaries and our nameless contributor gets a big pile of cash to bask in our gratitude and gets to privately savor the fruits of her bribery glory of her accomplishment. We are eternally grateful to this shameless extortionist and spy unique visionary and thank her from the bottom of our hearts for her generosity.

Bettina


Deanna


Jenni


Disclaimer: We cannot prove with any certainty that these were in fact written by the bachelorettes. For all we know, Elvira our secret source is also an extremely talented creative writer who penned these diaries during her lunch hour.

Thanks to contributing FORT writers and moderators : Yardgnome, AJane, lildago, roseskid, MsFroggy, AshleyPSU, marybethp, MotherSister, Marleybone, Mariner, speedbump, PhoneGrrrl, and Amanda.

[echo226]

Thank you MsFroggy and the consortium collaborating to collect and publish the secret evil thoughts of the stable of women with whom Fleiss' latest John Brad's has been sharing his attributes this amazing journey (drink, drink) !

I really enjoy these. The prologue detailing your ingenious efforts to collect the diaries is always such fun to read about, and Jenni's reference this week to her dirty dancing is perfect and a gem.

Thank you so much ,all of you ... and you be careful out there getting next weeks edition, you hear ? !!

[cafegirl]

Great job, everyone, very funny (especially DeAnna's)!!! I'm so glad cousin Elvira came through!!

[tabby cat]

Dear Diary,

I got $300 for those three diary entries I forged. My cousing is such sucker!

Elvira

[kendra_k]

Heeheehee! These are so great!

Thanks Miss Froggy.

[lyb5007]

Can't believe how great these are! EVERYTHING so funny! I love the show, Brad, the B'ettes...maybe love the snarky sTuff the best. Better check yourself before you wreck yourself...LAUGHING SO HARD!

[MsFroggy]

Heeheehee! These are so great!

Thanks Miss Froggy.

I can't take all the credit! We're all partners in crime, and should Uncle Vincenzo decide to target somebody, there's strength in numbers: Yardgnome, AJane, lildago, roseskid, MsFroggy, AshleyPSU, marybethp, MotherSister, Marleybone, Mariner, speedbump, PhoneGrrrl, and Amanda.

[psucashcow]

Thanks Miss Froggy...Yardgnome, AJane, lildago, roseskid, MsFroggy, AshleyPSU, marybethp, MotherSister, Marleybone, Mariner, speedbump, PhoneGrrrl, and Amanda.

These diaries are more fun than the show.

[Pangaeus]

These were really funny, especially DeAna's. Thanks for the "sluething" that brought the board these gems!

[echo226]

Too bad Mario couldn't get his hands on Jenni and DeAnna's final Diaries. I don't suppose DeAnna's Dad left one during his Malibu visit ... or wouldn't that be G-Rated ?

Thanks everyone. Happy Holiday !