The Bachelorette Diaries, Compliments of Mario - Part Two

[MsFroggy]

Our sexy pool boy, Mario, has agreed to help us out again this week, in exchange for cold hard cash our continued discretion. From our conversations with him, it became clear that Mario takes our vow of silence about the provenance of these diaries extremely seriously, and will not hesitate to contact his Uncle Vincenzo in Sicily should these diaries end up in the wrong hands.

During our secret dawn meeting, Mario, who showed up deeply tanned, oiled and well muscled, as befitting any good pool boy, was good enough to offer a few additional insider details about life in the Bachelorette house. He sighed deeply as he told us tales of being ogled day in and day out by sex starved pretty girls and even whispered some juicy details into our ear, that we just find too shocking to relate. Maybe next week. Hopefully Uncle Vincenzo won't find out.

Bettina


DeAnna


Hillary


Jade


Jenni


Kristy


McCarten


Sheena


Stephy


Disclaimer: We cannot prove with any certainty that these were in fact written by the bachelorettes. For all we know, Mario is also an extremely talented creative writer and cleaning pools is his day job...and a great way to keep that sexy golden tan.


Thanks to contributing FORT writers and moderators : Yardgnome, AJane, lildago, roseskid, MsFroggy, AshleyPSU, MotherSister, Marleybone, speedbump, PhoneGrrrl, and Amanda.

[cafegirl]

MsFroggy and company, you guys have done it again!!! Keep bribing Mario, because these are the best parts of this season!!! Much funnier and entertaining than the actual show!! Please keep 'em coming!!

[Arielflies]

Ooouuu....more precious pages ripped from the dearly and nearly departed. Mario is gooood. I hope I'm not imagining his sleek, chiseled chest and being blinded to the fact that he may be looking for a screenwriting agent .

Thank you all for challenging Mario's wrath :nono by sharing them with us.

[psucashcow]

Great job Ms. Froggy, Yardgnome, AJane, lildago, roseskid, MsFroggy, AshleyPSU, MotherSister, Marleybone, speedbump, PhoneGrrrl, and Amanda.

Sheena's diary is a piece of art. My boss will probably think I'm nuts when I start laughing visualizing Sheena hoola hooping to 99 Luft Balloons w/ the glad hands finish.

[Jewelsy]

Loved it!

[marlap]

Hysterical!!! You guys should be writing in Hollywood!!

[Secret]

I can't decide what made me laugh harder.. Deanna not taking crap off of her own diary, the cute little cheerleader paper for Jenni, or the liberal use of the term 'ho bag' in more than one ladies' diary entry.

Keep up the good work... erm... Mario!