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Thread: In Love ... With Winning.

  1. #1
    Yoffy lifts a finger... fluff's Avatar
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    In Love ... With Winning.

    I find it surprising that every season the women are almost universally interested in whoever the chosen Bachelor is.

    My Bach history is sketchy, but I can think of one, possibly two occasions in which a contestant has decided to take herself out of the game (one guy also bowed out during Trista's season).

    Are these participants always interested in the guy, or is it that they get caught up in the idea of being the chosen one?
    The fact that so many of these relationships don't last, a couple barely made it to the end of the post show publicity tour does make me wonder these supposedly burgeoning relationships we see are based on genuine attraction to the Bachelor or on the desire to be the last woman standing.

    I really think there is an element of "out of 25 women, he chose me...".

    It's just hard for the cynic in me to believe that every season every woman is interested enough in every Bachelor to stay in the running until they don't receive a rose.

  2. #2
    Premium Member pajamasam's Avatar
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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    Well fluff I think it's a manufactured process that Fleiss has perfected. Put these women in a house with no tv, music, books, or diversions. Just the guy. And booze. When they have a date, they get to leave. And have fun. And then they come home and have nothing to do but think about the guy. It's sort of a pressure cooker. Yes, the pressure cooker of love.
    Also, if they arent really getting much time with him, and are barely getting to know him, then it's natural to want to stay and try. After all, they arent filming this in Buffalo in January. No offense to Buffalo. But it's pretty. There's the ocean. And the potential for lots of fun travel and dates and maybe just maybe, love. So I guess I understand why most want to stay.

    Except during Jesse's season. Man they were running from him. I imagine Woo hoo. good times.

  3. #3
    Yoffy lifts a finger... fluff's Avatar
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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    This is the thing though, they could pretty much substitute any of the Bachelors in their given season with any other and the result would be the same.
    Women falling over themselves for a bit of one on one time and crying when they got overlooked.
    It's not about having feelings for that specific man.
    It could pretty much be any hand-picked, Fleiss-approved fellow and thre results would be the same.
    It makes me think that the feelings are not that genuine, or at least not once the show is over and they get to interact in the cold light of day, and I think that is rather backed up by the fact that most of the romances fail.
    I don't care how sensory deprived I was, there is no way I'd be attracted to most of these guys.

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    Likes Scottish Vikings! talldede's Avatar
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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    Quote Originally Posted by fluff;2363337;
    I don't care how sensory deprived I was, there is no way I'd be attracted to most of these guys.
    So true. I still shudder when I recall Jesse Palmer and his lack of manners and talking with his mouth full.......yuck!

    These women are in love with winning, staying at the house for as long as possible because it's fun, it's an adventure and your experiencing different places. I'd bet 75% of the gals have no real interest in the Bachelor, just staying in the sorority house for as long as possible.

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    Forum Assistant Arielflies's Avatar
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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    Quote Originally Posted by talldede;2363489;
    So true. I still shudder when I recall Jesse Palmer and his lack of manners and talking with his mouth full.......yuck!
    Melinda the doctor refused a rose before he picked up the first one at the ceremony following that dinner. smart girl.

    I compared this experience earlier to the Stockholm syndrome. You identify with your captor/object to the point (Fleiss hopes) of extreme tearful displays at being rejected by your captor. Your identity becomes plastic and pliable if you are unwise to the ways of TPTB. Those who survive intact seem to be those who are adaptable to living in close quarters with other captives and jailers constantly roaming around filming and recording your every movement. See, I may be a sucker for the romantic edit produced, but I am a cynic when it comes to the process.
    The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity. Dorothy Parker, (attributed)

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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    Arielflies, you should read Bel Canto by Ann Patchett. It's a great novel about just that syndrome!

    Back to The Bachelor though, I agree that the women get caught up in the game of it. You hear them saying they want to "win" and get a rose much more often than saying they want a rose because they really like the guy.

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    FORT Fogey Cleocatra's Avatar
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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    Quote Originally Posted by fluff;2363337;
    This is the thing though, they could pretty much substitute any of the Bachelors in their given season with any other and the result would be the same.
    Women falling over themselves for a bit of one on one time and crying when they got overlooked.
    It's not about having feelings for that specific man.
    It could pretty much be any hand-picked, Fleiss-approved fellow and thre results would be the same.
    It makes me think that the feelings are not that genuine, or at least not once the show is over and they get to interact in the cold light of day, and I think that is rather backed up by the fact that most of the romances fail.
    I don't care how sensory deprived I was, there is no way I'd be attracted to most of these guys.
    I agree Fluff.... they could take away whatever they want and if I wasnt attracted to the guy it wouldnt make any difference.

    Either I am attracted to someone or I'm not... i dont care if there's distractions or if I'm bored out of my gourd.... it wouldnt change my feelings.

    I think it's a lot of "in love with winning" like your title says

  8. #8
    my dog asks, "Got Milk?" MidwestMama's Avatar
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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    ITA with you fluff. It's like they're back in gym class and afraid they won't be picked for the team. But I also want to add:

    I went on a camping trip with the Sierra Club when I was a teen. I flew across the country by myself, met up with two dozen strangers, and spent two weeks fixing trails in the Sierra Nevadas (beautiful). By the end of the first week, I was disturbed in my mind by a detachment from my real self. I was losing my grasp on who I really was. I think it was because I was totally out of my element AND no one knew the real me. It was definately weird. Yeah, it made me extra emotional, too. I shook myself out of it the next day. You wonder how many of these women shake with relief when they come back to themselves.

    That said, I'm hoping this works for Andy and his chosen one.
    Last edited by MidwestMama; 05-02-2007 at 09:32 PM.

  9. #9
    Yoffy lifts a finger... fluff's Avatar
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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    Quote Originally Posted by MidwestMama;2363809;

    That said, I'm hoping this works for Andy and his chosen one.
    Absolutely.
    I find him a little on the dull side, but I hope this works out for them both.
    This train of thought of mine was prompted by talk in the Bevin thread of how she'd fallen in love with Andy.
    My contension is, and admittedly I don't know Bevin, but I really believe the ones who 'fall in love' would do so no matter which Bachelor they were presented with, which is likely why the couples tend to fall out of love again fairly swiftly.

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    Re: In Love ... With Winning.

    Fluff, I appreciate your having started this thread, because I too was wondering how could every girl (almost) every time, be wildly attracted to the bachelor? I am with the Stockholm syndrome people. It's pretty scary to realize how fragile your personality might be. There was a piece on NPR recently about an old research project in which perfectly nice people were turned into sadists under the influence of people in authority and close confinement.

    I guess we're lucky Fleiss is only manipulating the girls into crushes rather than producing sadistic prison guards.

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