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Thread: A Reflection on the Military Wife

  1. #31
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    Re: A Reflection on the Military Wife

    I am also a veteran- spouse is prior enlisted-16 yrs of sea duty- People ask how do you doit- We just do it- They could not do their jobs without us- Lots of the bachelor women in love with the idea of the officer/gentleman- reality is_ dutyL deployments- moves- kids- family emergency- labor alone- shall I go on- No one understands and ABC gave the girls a drop of life- the cool stuff- I hate to say it but Bevin would never fit into the Ward room functions which are crucial to a career- You must be eloquent and classy- able to hold your own- her is my question- if she had drama with a sprained ankle- how would she feel with giving birth alone or buying a house in a month when the orders change! Tessa can hang- I am a Social Worker too and her skills will serve her well- I chose the field cause I figured the therapy would help me too! God Bless America and our military@

  2. #32
    quality not quantity
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    Re: A Reflection on the Military Wife

    Bumping up once again for all those who have recently emerged from lurkdom - glad you joined the party.
    Last edited by soccermom2; 05-20-2007 at 04:39 PM.

  3. #33
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    Re: A Reflection on the Military Wife

    Thanks for the first post giving military wives at least some of the credit they deserve. I did that myself--sort of--for several years but also had a life and job of my own--which changes things a bit. So I can't say I lived up to the standard presented in the first post.

    I know it's slightly off topic but I wonder if anyone's read anything similar about military husbands who surely face unique challenges of their own?



    WGal raises her glass of Don Perignon champagne in honor of all military spouses.

    "They also serve who only stand and wait."

  4. #34
    Feels a connection w/ you charlie9's Avatar
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    Re: A Reflection on the Military Wife

    With all due respect...and as a military wife myself...I take a bit of exception to that article. I think a lot of it was probably true for previous generations. But nowadays, at least in my experience, some of that stuff is pretty outdated if it's considered a REQUIREMENT for being a military wife, rather than a choice.

    I totally respect the choices many wives (military and non-military alike) have made to be stay-at-home moms, or to make their husband's career always the first priority. I think it's every woman's right to choose to do this *if she wants to* and that job is no less important that jobs outside the home, so it is a valid and important decision that can bring people a lot of joy.

    But, I think in this day and age, it is no longer necessary to assume that this is the ONLY role a military wife can have. Or that these qualities are necessary to being a successful and supportive military wife.

    I and many other military wives I know do not have children. And/or, have chosen to have our own successful careers and lives independent of our husbands and the military, but are still able to maintain a good marriage that is able to adapt to and support and respect our husbands' service to the country.

    So I guess my point is, though miltary wives face many unique challenges and decisions, we come in all varieties and personality types, just like all other wives. So say "a military wife is this or that" is to me a lot like saying "a wife is this or that." For me, your marriage is what you make it, together, and there are many ways a wife can make her own career work --- even when married to a serviceman. There are also ways that a soldier can make sacrifices in his career when necessary, just as a wife can make sacrifices in her career and life for his career. And finally, there are plenty of military families who don't have children.

    So if Tessa and Andy are committed to eachother and respect eachother equally, and both are willing to compromise, whatever her personality type is, I think they will be able to make it work. (I am not too far from a "social worker from San Francisco," myself, and my veteran husband and I couldn't be happier.)
    Last edited by charlie9; 05-25-2007 at 02:58 PM.
    Perfection is just fine by me!

  5. #35
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    Re: A Reflection on the Military Wife

    My husband & I are both veterans from a long time ago - Air Force. I just want to say AMEN & Thank you to all of the military serving today & their families. Without you this country wouldn't be as great as it is. Tessa appears to be a strong person. She hung in there on the show didn't she. If you keep the humor in life you can survive almost anything and they both seem to be able to make the other one laugh. That is so imprtant-- as the saying goes " LIVE, LAUGH & LOVE"!!

  6. #36
    FORT Regular KayDee's Avatar
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    Re: A Reflection on the Military Wife

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie9;2419150;
    With all due respect...and as a military wife myself...I take a bit of exception to that article. I think a lot of it was probably true for previous generations. But nowadays, at least in my experience, some of that stuff is pretty outdated if it's considered a REQUIREMENT for being a military wife, rather than a choice.

    I totally respect the choices many wives (military and non-military alike) have made to be stay-at-home moms, or to make their husband's career always the first priority. I think it's every woman's right to choose to do this *if she wants to* and that job is no less important that jobs outside the home, so it is a valid and important decision that can bring people a lot of joy.

    But, I think in this day and age, it is no longer necessary to assume that this is the ONLY role a military wife can have. Or that these qualities are necessary to being a successful and supportive military wife.

    I and many other military wives I know do not have children. And/or, have chosen to have our own successful careers and lives independent of our husbands and the military, but are still able to maintain a good marriage that is able to adapt to and support and respect our husbands' service to the country.

    So I guess my point is, though miltary wives face many unique challenges and decisions, we come in all varieties and personality types, just like all other wives. So say "a military wife is this or that" is to me a lot like saying "a wife is this or that." For me, your marriage is what you make it, together, and there are many ways a wife can make her own career work --- even when married to a serviceman. There are also ways that a soldier can make sacrifices in his career when necessary, just as a wife can make sacrifices in her career and life for his career. And finally, there are plenty of military families who don't have children.

    So if Tessa and Andy are committed to eachother and respect eachother equally, and both are willing to compromise, whatever her personality type is, I think they will be able to make it work. (I am not too far from a "social worker from San Francisco," myself, and my veteran husband and I couldn't be happier.)
    I agree 100%. I have been a military wife for almost 11 years now. I have my own successful career, my own friends and an independant life outside the military. We have a fantastic marriage that a lot of our friends both in the military and out are envious of. We are just now expecting our first child and couldn't be more thrilled.

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