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Thread: Your advice for the next bachelorette

  1. #41
    FORT Fogey
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    Jillly: Please just think for a minute. Before the story got out of how this season ends, Chris Harrison was emphatic in interviews that the next Bacherlorette would be someone with no prior connection to the show or a season. "A new fresh face" is what he said.

    So, why all of a sudden you? Now, I adore you, but don't be a tool they use to do damage control. See, as this has blown up, they face anger and maybe a loss of a sizeable number of female fans. What to do? Get someone those women care about to front the next season.

    They never would have selected you if they hadn't been outed. Step back and let them face their medicine. You don't need the show but they need you. And they don't deserve your help.

  2. #42
    FORT Fogey norealityhere's Avatar
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    If it is, infact, Jillian as the next Bachelorette, I would advise her to be herself. She is a strong, independent woman and not all men can handle that. Jlllian is smart enough to know early on which men will be the keepers.
    To Thine Own Self Be True

  3. #43
    Leaning Forward cantstopwatchin's Avatar
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    * I know everyone's said it before me, but stay true to who you are. You've got a good head on your shoulders, so try not to get pulled into the whole "fantasy" aspect.

    * You mentioned in one of the episodes that you wished you were just hanging out in a bar, having a beer-- I think you should make this one of your group dates. Take the guys and then take the opportunity to sit with each one and see which ones you can have 'real' conversations with.

    * Make sure the guys are interested in *you* and not just winning. And make sure whichever guy you choose has been treating you like gold throughout the whole process!

    * Don't let both guys get down on their knees! Don't forget they're going to have just as big a following as you've had this season. So make sure you let your final guys leave with as much dignity as they can.

    * However many times you're told to say overused words such as "amazing", "journey", etc., disregard their instructions and speak normally!

    * If you're not feeling it in the end, then don't choose anyone!

    * Please make sure you don't tell 2 guys you love them! If you do, then make sure you date them both after the show before making your final decision.

    * Have a good time! I thought you were a hoot this season and I'm rooting for you, but in the end, I just want to see go through this process and come out the same person!!! Don't give TPTB any opportunity to throw you under the bus.
    "We must overcome the notion that we must be regular...it robs you of the chance to be extraordinary and leads you to the mediocre." - Uta Hagen

    “I don’t want my pain erased! As wretched as it is, I need my pain… It makes me who I am. It makes me Grumpy.” - Grumpy, Once Upon a Time

  4. #44
    FORT Fogey
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    I still say she should try her best to get out of this. Take a look at what MF and his cronies have done to Jason. They managed to take what was probably one of the most beloved and popular bachelors of this entire series and turn him in to the most reviled (not saying Jason did not play a part in that).

    So, I guess my advice is that if Jillian is in fact the next Bachelorette... watch this season very closely, pay attention to the aftermath, and do everything in your power not to let history repeat itself. Learn from Brad's, Deanna's and Jason's mistakes, and make the most of this opportunity.

    In a nutshell... Do not sell out!!!

  5. #45
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    Before taping starts:
    • Talk to former bachelors and bachelorettes a lot!
    • Get some intensive therapy before the taping of the show to work out as many personal and relationship "issues" as you can to give yourself the best chance possible of staying strong through all this and making wise choices.
    • Study Trista and Ryan's season, especially Trista's behavior and the signs she paid attention to that allowed her to see that Ryan was the best choice.
    • Ask the producers as soon as possible to bring out a friend or two to help you decide between the men sometime during the taping.
    • Anything you say can and will be taken totally out of context, spliced and diced, and used to misrepresent you if it will allow Fleiss to construct a character and storyline that will increase ratings . . . so don't give him ammunition in case he decides to give you a unfavorable edit. Decide before taping starts what you will and will not say and do, then stick with that.

    Once the taping starts:
    • Spend a lot of time talking on the phone and via Skype with the people you care about the most. They will help to keep you grounded.
    • Insist on non-alcoholic drinks (for you) the whole show and insist on getting as much sleep as possible. These two things will help keep you from saying and doing things you are likely to regret later.
    • Just because you are crazy attracted to some guy does not mean he's the best guy for you in the long run (read some Harville Hendrix). Moderate attraction *will* grow over time with the right guy.
    • Remember that most of the guys who come on this show are more interested in promoting themselves and their career than finding true love. Study the characteristics of narcissists and remain aloof with those kinds of men, no matter how good looking and charming they are!
    • A good guy usually comes from a loving, supportive family. He's humble, empathetic, and willing to be vulnerable with you. He's consistently affectionate and attentive, and pays close attention to what you say. He's eager to please you in his own sincere, heart-felt way. And he's not still in love with an ex girlfriend.
    • Act just as cooperative with the producers as you need to to convince them you are on board with their pre-scripted plans, but say what you want when the mics can't pick it up, and say what you want at the FRC. By then, what can they do if you and the F1 and F2 are not willing to re-tape?
    • Finally, if you are not really into anyone but choose to act like you are in the end, steal a private moment to let him know before the FRC to make sure he's willing to go along with the farce. Then you can have your fake 3 month ATFR relationship without breaking some poor guy's heart.

  6. #46
    FORT Fogey Cailg's Avatar
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    Jilly, I love you! I sincerely wish you weren't going into Fleiss' frying pan, but if you really want to do this, here's my advice..before you sign anything, get a really good attorney who will review the contract inside and out. I want you to make sure it is very pro you. Fleiss needs you. You have a lot of good will coming with you. He knows after this season, he needs someone with fan support and who is credible. That's you. So, dictate to him what you want in the contract, and if he doesn't tell him you are walking and will announce publically the reasons.

    The contract cannot allow for any kind of storyboard or preordained plot to be followed. You must have the right to pick no one as the F1. You must have the right to say whatever you want to say in interviews provided you are not giving away the ending of the show and are telling the truth. If you prefer the set up de had with some of the guys staying in your house/mansion for periods of time so you can get to know them better, then put that in the contract as your option.

    Also, do not permit any provision that gives Fleiss and Co/ABC the right to approve/disapprove of any job, public appearances, etc. that you may want to do for 2 years after the show is over (you can concede that you will not pose nude or do anything that appears immoral). But if you allow them to control you for 2 years, they have the ability to use that power as leverage over you.

    Lastly, what you wear must be your decision..so if you want to wear a two piece that is more substantial than the itsy pitsy bikini they hand you, you have the right to decide.

    I will think of more.

  7. #47
    Historically Addicted lovemygirls's Avatar
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    Good advice all!

    My advice...legal stuff aside...be yourself, show those hot men a good Canadian time and tell them if they don't behave, they will be sent to Northern Alberta where the Ukranians will take care of them.

  8. #48
    FORT Fanatic alsoaktchr's Avatar
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    Oh my, do wish you could still get out of this... sigh...

    You've already gotten lots of good advice above...not sure what else I could add... Don't know if you're a praying person, but with so much out of your hands as Bachelorette, and in the hands of people who may not always have your best interests at heart, turning to a Higher Power, to my eyes, seems like a must. He/She can bring good out of any situation... and if you're meant to find your prince this way, you will...Fleiss and his minions notwithstanding... (On a personal note, it wasn't till I handed over my anxiety about ever meeting my own prince that he actually showed up in my life... I was 33, but it was worth the wait..) Sure hope I'm not freaking you out here by this sort of talk... I'm not trying to proselytize or anything of the sort... I'm just one who's been disconcerted by the way Fleiss et al have trivialized marriage, and am convinced, from personal experience, that strong marriages do not come about - and certainly do not survive - without some help from the Guy/Gal Upstairs...

    You seemed on TB to be a person who really has her head on straight, and knows what's important in life. Do whatever you need, bring with you whatever you need, to keep yourself centered throughout this process. And if it turns out that your prince is not among the 25, I'm sure you will still enjoy the opportunities for meeting all kinds of people, and allowing them a glimpse of your own very special way of looking at life. Those 25 men will be very lucky to have crossed paths with you, no matter how briefly.

    I hope it's ok to use this forum to acknowledge your wonderful family. I soooo loved your hometown date. Your family was so awesome. (And your mom's candor so admirable.) I think your hometown visit was actually one of the most positive things shown during B13...

    I'll get off my soapbox now! Sending you hugs ((()) and best wishes....

  9. #49
    FORT Fogey I'msotired's Avatar
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    Quote Originally Posted by imissme;3356054;
    I love this advice! Could she also somehow humilate TPTB? Idk, maybe find a naked pic of Fliess and post it on FORT with the caption..."Unfair, I was just in the cold ocean water"
    I'm liking this angle. How about insisting on a live FRC or ATFR and pull an "ED TV" stunt and ask viewers to send in stuff about MF?

  10. #50
    FORT Fogey I'msotired's Avatar
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    Re: Your advice for the next bachelorette

    Quote Originally Posted by cantstopwatchin;3356323;
    * I know everyone's said it before me, but stay true to who you are. You've got a good head on your shoulders, so try not to get pulled into the whole "fantasy" aspect.

    * You mentioned in one of the episodes that you wished you were just hanging out in a bar, having a beer-- I think you should make this one of your group dates. Take the guys and then take the opportunity to sit with each one and see which ones you can have 'real' conversations with.

    * Make sure the guys are interested in *you* and not just winning. And make sure whichever guy you choose has been treating you like gold throughout the whole process!

    * Don't let both guys get down on their knees! Don't forget they're going to have just as big a following as you've had this season. So make sure you let your final guys leave with as much dignity as they can.

    * However many times you're told to say overused words such as "amazing", "journey", etc., disregard their instructions and speak normally!

    * If you're not feeling it in the end, then don't choose anyone!

    * Please make sure you don't tell 2 guys you love them! If you do, then make sure you date them both after the show before making your final decision.

    * Have a good time! I thought you were a hoot this season and I'm rooting for you, but in the end, I just want to see go through this process and come out the same person!!! Don't give TPTB any opportunity to throw you under the bus.

    Good ones. May I add the phrase "I feel we have a connection" to your list?

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