B13 Thoughts and Comments

[KareyR2]

I don't believe any of them should be getting engaged at this point. I feel like many of them are in love with the idea of being in love, in love with the idea of the wedding...but not so much the marriage. And it feels like some people get married to test out whether and when they will get divorced any more.

I find it interesting what is happening with Jason's season. This is a man who now claims until the last day to be in love with 2 women. Jason also claimed to be in love with DeAnna just last May, and he proposed to her. I recall him asking her Father for his blessing on his proposal and Jason commented at the time he could never imagine not asking the Father for their blessing in such an event. Hmmmmmm...since he is claiming to be in love with both F2...what did he do then. Will we see him ask both Father's for their blessing as PLO did , or will he make a phonecall to Mel's Father that day when he makes his decision on which woman he loves the most! How romantic.

I think Jason is someone so in love with the idea of being in love, he has stated he is in love with 3 women and proposed to 2 of them in the matter of 6 months. Melissa seems to be able to turn herself into whatever Jason needs, as she seems in love with the idea of the wedding...(her bringing her wedding dress comment anyone! Flashes of PLO's Lisa! ) Funny how Melissa's matching stated career aspirations to DeAnna of wanting to be in the media, well they suddenly changed when Melissa was on her first date with a single father....interesting the big leap from a career in the media, to now wanting to teach first graders. How convenient for her! And Jason bought it just like he bought DeAnna's wanting to have 3 babies by the time she is 30. Jason, you know where that got you, so RUN FOR THE HILLS MAN!

Jason and Melissa should not be engaged at this point....they should be taking this slow. I wish them the best, but I give them to last until their contract for their ABC paid, televised wedding contract is over, or if that doesn't happen until the first winter in Seattle, or til Ty's first temper tantrum in a grocery store. Melissa does not seem mature enough to get married, and Jason seems to be in love with the idea of being in love with DeAnna Part Deux (DPD). I wish Jay and DPD the best...I don't see it working at all. Thanks and JMHO of course
Karey

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[BlondieGal]

I listened to the guitar music from Meredith's and Ian's fantasy date in order to compare it to the guitar music from both Molly's and Melissa's 1:1 dates. All three are totally different songs (melodies). They have the guitar as a commonality, but that is it.

[Bloomers]

This may be an edit question. I will take it there as well, but what possible significance do you see in the phrase "true love" as it seems to be appearing? I have now noted that Jason has said in a media release, "When I find my "true love"....". Melissa has a medium sized tat that says "true love", and one of the bust casts is painted with the words "true love".

Is this a theme? If so, do you think think this phrase could have possible ramifications beyond just an association with a past boyfriend?

[VelvetRed]

asking her father for her hand at her parents' visit - which was the first time we had seen that, and it wasn't producer generated either

How do we know that?

Everyone talks about how scripted/manipulated this franchise is...so...?

[Bloomers]

Originally Posted by VelvetRed

How do we know that?

Everyone talks about how scripted/manipulated this franchise is...so...?

Have you ever seen that season? Ryan was a sweetheart, but he stumbled around and almost stuttered in getting out what he felt and wanted to say. I wanted to help him get it out and say it sometimes! I don't think I have ever seen anybody so nervous or so sincere. I don't think this guy was a tool for ABC at all. Now the other one, Charlie, may well have done something they wanted. He went on to do EXTRA segments.

[anders332]

Originally Posted by atem

It's strange how there really isn't any way to measure what the viewing audience thinks.

they should do a phone/online poll every week - for 24 hours after the most recent show airs. It would be interesting to see where everyone is in their opinions of who the 'winner' is.......

[anders332]

Originally Posted by Bloomers

Originally Posted by grneyedgirl
This is where I disagree--I view an engagement as a commitment to marry. I think that the relationship needs to be tested prior to being engaged. The way I look at it, being engaged means that one knows they are going to marry the other person--they just need to plan the wedding and party.




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I agree with both of these posts. Although you do hear of engagements that go on and on and then sputter (cough, Ian), basically the idea of an engagement means you plan to marry in the near future.
The "getting to know you" phase should be done before that.

cough, cough, Byron.....cough, cough.

But I do agree that an engagement is a promise and a commitment and not to be used as a way to provide entertainment for a reality show.

[VelvetRed]

Originally Posted by Bloomers

Have you ever seen that season? Ryan was a sweetheart, but he stumbled around and almost stuttered in getting out what he felt and wanted to say. I wanted to help him get it out and say it sometimes! I don't think I have ever seen anybody so nervous or so sincere. I don't think this guy was a tool for ABC at all. Now the other one, Charlie, may well have done something they wanted. He went on to do EXTRA segments.

Ah, so it is your interpretation, then. The way you worded it made it sound like you had some inside info or definitive proof.

[Bloomers]

Originally Posted by VelvetRed

Ah, so it is your interpretation, then. The way you worded it made it sound like you had some inside info or definitive proof.

When I watched Trista's season, I had just finished watching my first reality show, and I was extremely irked by the editing deception in supposedly "reality" tv; therefore, when I watched Trista's show I was watching these people and everything that happened like a hawk.
I re-watched her season last summer when it ran on cable, and I had read it right the first time.
Now, that is not to say that I don't miss it sometimes because I do, but I try hard to catch the deception. I don't like being deliberately deceived.

[Tiger Pride Mom]

Originally Posted by Bloomers

She said she wanted to get her teaching certificate which is different from a degree. She already has a degree. She will have to go back and pick up some ed courses to get certified. She said it so quickly that I think it might very well have been on her mind. She has been out of school for a while in her fulltime job long enough to know whether that is what she wants to do for the rest of her life. People do make career changes; however, I have to laugh because it is usually the other way around. Many first year teachers leave the field and go into something else - stressful and low pay.

I thought Melissa's comment was very revealing. She got her degree and she's been in the job market and has, perhaps, found it unsatisfying to the point where she's been thinking of making a change. To me, that also says something about how well she's come to know herself.

I started teaching the day after graduating from college. Four and a half years later, I was burned to a crisp from administrative b.s and bureaucracy. Although leaving my students was heart-breaking, I did it, and gave myself the gift of the search. Throughout it all, I knew something was still missing--my goal was to find where I was meant to be. Those few years away gave me a perspective I couldn't put into focus right away, that no matter the extraneous baggage that accompanies education, I needed to work with kids. I returned to the classroom--nearly twenty years ago now--and still adore my high school students.

I sense Melissa has been on her own journey, both personally and professionally. I wish her godspeed.