Body, Lip and Facial Communication Bachelor 12 *SPOILERS*

[clmlw]

Originally Posted by mamaspy

I have sons and looking at the girls left- if they were bringing them home to meet me, I think I would still prefer an Amanda type, teasing , joking etc , Shayne gives off a drama vibe, Noelle is too quiet , and Chelsea.....is nice but seems too tomboyish..JMO , tho.

I would much prefer that my son bring home Shayne than Amanda, Chelsea, or Noelle. It seems Shayne and Matt would balance each other out completely, whereas Amanda and Matt together would get old and boring REALLY fast.

[Google]

 

[clmlw]

Originally Posted by Lynn7

"...there is something in her that brings out this Superman syndrome because there are other times where he seems, not weak in the knees, but her vulnerableness weakens him and he is drawn to look after her...if that makes sense. Save her.

This is why I really hope that he doesn't pick her in the end because I will truly feel bad for her.

If we look at sociological (and even anthropological) origins, the man *IS* the hunter, protector, breadwinner, etc. The female is the gatherer, as well as the more emotional one of the pair.

That being said, it makes complete sense that Shayne is more "attractive," (regardless of appearance) to Matt because Amanda doesn't evoke the same "protect me" feelings in Matt that Shayne does.

In other words, because Shayne is the more vulnerable of the 2, that would typically give her an edge.

[MattLuvsShayne]

Originally Posted by Lynn7

There are actually red flags with all of the F3. Some are easier to overcome than others but the red flags are there with all of them.

That scene that you refer to really confounded me. For most of it, his body language was so negative. I'm pretty sure I wrote about it on that night. And, while the Shayne Show Team saw love and affection, the scene, overall, didn't read that way at all to me.

I think, that *if* Shayne ends up being F1, then Matt is playing this girl in an effort to get another notch on his belt or count another conquest. He himself has said that she is out of his league looks wise. He has also said, repeatedly, that their worlds are so different. Hers likely glamourous his a boring bankers life.

Lynn I stayed up until 5am just to read your insights and everyones comments thats how fascinating this discussion is thank you everyone.

I find it interesting how as you said people see what they want to see I really enjoy reading your take on body language but being the Team Shayne girlie I admit to being I see his kisses his caresses his connection (hell I want a drink for typing that word) lol far more telling as in I am into this girl I really feel something for her Matt has said that himself he also has a fun connection (okay making myself a martini right now) with Shayne when they went skiing I saw the laugh with her as genuine just as I did with Amanda and Chelsea not fake at all.

One more thing than I really need to get some ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ"s your last line begged for me to comment this to anyone invested in any of these girls.

If as you say Matt is picking Shayne to get another notch in his belt why would he be good enough for any of these girls if he picks them??

Also does anyone remember the TMZ blurb??? Matt apparently wasn't being honest about his intentions of finding true love that he told the TMZ reporterette who he didn't know was a reporterette that "he wasn't necessarily doing this for love but to live in the USA"

If this wasn't true why hasn't TMZ pulled it???Harvey Levin who is the head of TMZ is a well know entertainment lawyer he could get into heap of trouble for posting false statements.Why hasn't ABC responded if it wasn't true ??? and most of all why are Shaynes motives using Shayne because more people point to her as being fake phoney etc, being questioned when it seems like Matts are far more suspect given this article???

[jg1958]

Originally Posted by clmlw

If we look at sociological (and even anthropological) origins, the man *IS* the hunter, protector, breadwinner, etc. The female is the gatherer, as well as the more emotional one of the pair.

That being said, it makes complete sense that Shayne is more "attractive," (regardless of appearance) to Matt because Amanda doesn't evoke the same "protect me" feelings in Matt that Shayne does.

In other words, because Shayne is the more vulnerable of the 2, that would typically give her an edge.

IMO, now a days ladies are a lot more independant than in the older days, and men tend to enjoy the independance of our today's ladies. With that being said, just maybe Matt is like that, we don't, well I don't know him personnaly, let's wait it out and see what happen. I know my son would prefer an independant woman, than one that needs to be reasured all the time, and he is 31, Anyway this is just my opinion.

[chucksmiles]

What the heck is wrong with "boring" if that is what you think Amanda is? With over a 50% divorce rate I think people should stop thinking party all the time and start to think real life and someone they will be with for the long haul...someone that may put on some extra weight in the years, grey hair, "older age" medical problems, and yet you still love that person. Young people today are all image and not substance. Amanda is beautiful, smart, and seems to have her head on straight, Matt would be very lucky to receive her love if it is meant to be! Sorry for the rant, but yeah I speak from a 32 year marriage to the best guy!

[jg1958]

Originally Posted by chucksmiles

What the heck is wrong with "boring" if that is what you think Amanda is? With over a 50% divorce rate I think people should stop thinking party all the time and start to think real life and someone they will be with for the long haul...someone that may put on some extra weight in the years, grey hair, "older age" medical problems, and yet you still love that person. Young people today are all image and not substance. Amanda is beautiful, smart, and seems to have her head on straight, Matt would be very lucky to receive her love if it is meant to be! Sorry for the rant, but yeah I speak from a 32 year marriage to the best guy!

Thanks chucksmiles, you are so right, love is deeper than just the looks, it is so much deeper.

[Minney]

Originally Posted by jg1958

Thanks chucksmiles, you are so right, love is deeper than just the looks, it is so much deeper.

ITA! Love and a committed relationship (marriage) is a lot more than just looks and hot chemistry. I'd take a stable character with great values and a sense of humor anyday for my life partner. All of these girls have the ability to be a stable and loving partner to the right person, but is the right person Matt?

[mamaspy]

Originally Posted by clmlw

If we look at sociological (and even anthropological) origins, the man *IS* the hunter, protector, breadwinner, etc. The female is the gatherer, as well as the more emotional one of the pair.

That being said, it makes complete sense that Shayne is more "attractive," (regardless of appearance) to Matt because Amanda doesn't evoke the same "protect me" feelings in Matt that Shayne does.

In other words, because Shayne is the more vulnerable of the 2, that would typically give her an edge.

I find Shayne to be very confident, candid, and not overly emotional, well- exhuberant but not 'poor little me' emotional.

I would say when Matt pulled Amanda aside at rugby to give her pointers- one could say he was doing it because she was vulnerable .

[beachgirl4]

It is clear that the Amanda-lovers and the Shayne-lovers see things differently. That's okay, and that's why each are in their respective camps. I just want to point out that human beings are multi-dimensional, as are relationships, and we are only seeing a VERY small sampling of the interactions of these people, and very possibly they are at least directed and even somewhat scripted. Still, if we analyze the interactions for what we see, the reality is that everyone is vulnerable at times, and most people have their strengths and areas of independence. We can see both in all of these people.

We all view everything we see through the veil of our own experiences, values, prejudices, and just plain preferences, and that's why we see things differently in terms of who we would want our sons and daughters to bring home. I think the fact that everyone points out their 'pick' as who they would want their son or daughter to bring home points exactly to those preferences, etc. I think we tend to want the person we most identify with to 'win' because in a weird sort of way, it 'validates' us and that's one reason why some people get really invested in whether a certain bachelorette wins, even though TB is the only one to whom it ultimately matters.

I'm not sure if there's a point to this, but I was just thinking about this as I read through all of the posts about 'if it were my son or daughter.' I have a son and have an opinion as well, and yes, it lines up with who I like best and who I think fits my values, and I think most of us are the same way. I will also add that I think my marriage has elements of Matt's interactions with all the F3, and I truly think that's what it takes to make a marriage work - multifacets that when one element of your relationship ebbs, another kicks in.

[Babycakee]

Originally Posted by beachgirl4

It is clear that the Amanda-lovers and the Shayne-lovers see things differently. That's okay, and that's why each are in their respective camps. I just want to point out that human beings are multi-dimensional, as are relationships, and we are only seeing a VERY small sampling of the interactions of these people, and very possibly they are at least directed and even somewhat scripted. Still, if we analyze the interactions for what we see, the reality is that everyone is vulnerable at times, and most people have their strengths and areas of independence. We can see both in all of these people.

We all view everything we see through the veil of our own experiences, values, prejudices, and just plain preferences, and that's why we see things differently in terms of who we would want our sons and daughters to bring home. I think the fact that everyone points out their 'pick' as who they would want their son or daughter to bring home points exactly to those preferences, etc. I think we tend to want the person we most identify with to 'win' because in a weird sort of way, it 'validates' us and that's one reason why some people get really invested in whether a certain bachelorette wins, even though TB is the only one to whom it ultimately matters.

I'm not sure if there's a point to this, but I was just thinking about this as I read through all of the posts about 'if it were my son or daughter.' I have a son and have an opinion as well, and yes, it lines up with who I like best and who I think fits my values, and I think most of us are the same way. I will also add that I think my marriage has elements of Matt's interactions with all the F3, and I truly think that's what it takes to make a marriage work - multifacets that when one element of your relationship ebbs, another kicks in.

So well put ~ Very inspirational as well!