Thread: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

  1. #5031
    RENThead JLuvs's Avatar
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by intheblind;2681592;
    How so Jluvs?? Babyface seems to be sabotaging tomorrow nite going against what is being previewed to happen?? Why I have no clue but either babyface is BS'ing or ABC is?? Take your pick?? lol
    There is nothing more that I can say other than I would recommend you all watch it. Like Kikora said it is not without pain, but I think it is worth seeing.
    Whenever you see darkness, there is extraordinary opportunity for the light to burn brighter.
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  2. #5032
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by Bjaminsmom;2681597;
    I think Brad made a courageous choice to choose no one! He was in a no win situaiton and honestly who would have watched the show if anyone had any idea that he chose no one! Tell Brad good for him! To borrow a line from Bettina - he didn't want to settle for OK and he shouldn't be ashamed about that. At least he didn't fall into the "fantasy" of the show and not realize that once he left the show it was reality.

    People need to understand that he didn't ask these women to move to Austin with him knowing full well he wasn't going to go any further in a relationship. That would have been a sign of a real jerk. Over the last few shows I have said Brad isn't ready for a real relationship and I guess I was shown that given what has happened on the show. Whatever his reasons are for not presueing a relationship are his own, I have my opinions but the are surely based on what I have been shown and may not be what he really feels.

    Tell Brad to be happy and this too will pass. (Still wish he would have picked Bettina as I saw that as an actual "real" life dating situation with ALL it's issues )

    Good post !! Makes sense!!

  3. #5033
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by drooler;2681544;
    That said, the editing certainly made everyone look awful.
    I think that's one of the things that bothers me the most. I think the ending caused the producers to drag the women through the gutter to make Brad look good. I don't think some of them deserved it.

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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by finalefan;2681596;
    I think, like Brad, you are seeing this in black and white.

    He did not have to a) make a promise or b) dump her at the FRC. There is plenty of middle ground between the two. If dating IRL didn't work out, OK, cool, it didn't work out.

    The issue I also have is that I don't accept that Brad's "intense feelings" and the real emotion I believe I saw were turned off like a water tap. There's something going on there. I think that you (and BabyfaceC in defending his friend) want to make a point of saying that Brad flat-out knew it'd never work with Deanna. I guess I just don't understand why, in light of the things Brad said to and about Deanna (and Jenni, even).

    Bah. Maybe this is all my issue. Apparently, love hits you like a lightning bolt or it doesn't and everything is all tidy-tidy-tidy settled then from that day forward. Press the star key for marriage, press 0 for nope-see-ya. Gee, my love life then has apparently held way too much unnecessary drama.
    At what point do you allow someone to interpret their ability to love as their own and stop applying your own personal standards? Yes, its a reality show and its fair game to analyze and be opinionated about... But when does someone take a step back and acknowledge "this is what I would do, but how in the world can I expect the same from someone else"... Its their own life experiences that have molded them

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    FORT Fogey casualfan's Avatar
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by tabby cat;2681595;
    He could talk about the women he met--their different backgrounds, interests. He could have talked about this as perhaps the most intense introspective period of his life and how he learned a lot about himself. He could compare it to his life working at the bars--the similarities and differences in the way he relates to people...

    He had the perfect out for not answering questions: The producers were afraid he would spill the beans. He could have stated up front that he wasn't going to say anything about the outcome for fear of giving it all away. He could have repeated the same lines over and over again, like most politicians do.
    I'm glad that Brad hasn't been a politician parrot. I can find them anytime I turn on the news channels. His honesty is refreshing. Jenni and Deanna really are sweet, smart, amazing women. He's lucky to have met them but if they are not the woman for him, who are we as viewers of the show to judge?

  6. #5036
    FORT Fanatic bogey123's Avatar
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by Kikora;2681589;
    I'd say watch. Though inevitably some of it will be painful. The girls are lovely and there are some other parts that I'm sure you'll be glad to see.
    Okay Kikora & Jluvs, I'll watch the final show. I can handle a little more pain. The Thanksgiving cooking will be easier I guess, just hope there are some turkeys left to buy. Feel so bad for DeAnna & Jenni. I'm hoping that something will be "happy" this week.

  7. #5037
    FORT Fogey grneyedgirl's Avatar
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by finalefan;2681596;
    I think, like Brad, you are seeing this in black and white.

    He did not have to a) make a promise or b) dump her at the FRC. There is plenty of middle ground between the two. If dating IRL didn't work out, OK, cool, it didn't work out.

    The issue I also have is that I don't accept that Brad's "intense feelings" and the real emotion I believe I saw were turned off like a water tap. There's something going on there. I think that you (and BabyfaceC in defending his friend) want to make a point of saying that Brad flat-out knew it'd never work with Deanna. I guess I just don't understand why, in light of the things Brad said to and about Deanna (and Jenni, even).

    Bah. Maybe this is all my issue. Apparently, love hits you like a lightning bolt or it doesn't and everything is all tidy-tidy-tidy settled then from that day forward. Press the star key for marriage, press 0 for nope-see-ya. Gee, my love life then has apparently held way too much unnecessary drama.
    I agree...I don't quite understand it either. I truly don't. I heard the same things that you heard tonight. My jaw HIT THE FLOOR when I first saw the scene with Brad and DeAnna. So so sweet...

    Bottom line, Brad doesn't decide who I date, so I am not going to try to tell him who to date.

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    FORT Aficionado echo226's Avatar
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by grneyedgirl;2681575;
    For all parties involved.

    So basically, people would feel better if he made her a promise for the pleasure of the viewing audience, but then dumped her behind the scenes?
    No. I think he could have simply and kindly told each of the women that he wasn't prepared to make a "forever" decision at this time.

    I have to give Jenni lots of props for being very intelligent and for trying to be circumspect and careful. Jenni really told Brad and his family the ending of the season. That you shouldn't "have to" say I love you, it should just come out. "gasp"
    "The way to become boring is to say everything." Voltaire

    " The greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated. "
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  9. #5039
    Hating finales since 2006 finalefan's Avatar
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Quote Originally Posted by babyfaceC;2681606;
    At what point do you allow someone to interpret their ability to love as their own and stop applying your own personal standards? Yes, its a reality show and its fair game to analyze and be opinionated about... But when does someone take a step back and acknowledge "this is what I would do, but how in the world can I expect the same from someone else"... Its their own life experiences that have molded them
    I hope you realize any reference to my own love life was sarcasm!

    Even so, that's a valid question. I realize we all have different life experiences. I just feel like ABC introduced to me to a Bachelor whose life experiences have made him miserably inept at relationships, and they didn't even give me any warning!

    There's not a right way or a wrong way to "do" love. If that's what you're trying to get across, I freely concede that. (Or, I concede it anyway!) I just feel that Brad shut himself down just when he was on the cusp of something great -- or, to be more accurate, it was presented as if he refused to explore something that could've been something great. It's unfortunate for everyone. Maybe most of all Brad, because I think Deanna and Jenni will be fine but Brad maybe not. If his life experiences have made exploring love difficult, I hope he works through those issues. He probably should've worked through them before 25 women were put through the wringer.

    One thing I do know that is pretty universal: Either love finds you, or you find it. Brad ultimately seemed open to neither.

    ETA: Please realize that I KNOW I'm working with only what ABC has shown us. It was a disappointing finale. I think many of us came to see Brad as our "favorite" bachelor. We feel betrayed!

    I do kind of feel like he turned "chicken." What was it that happened? Did Deanna's breath stink? Did she have weird feet? Did she chew with her mouth open? I mean, OK, these might be things a person can't learn to live with. I just don't understand, I guess, what it was about Deanna that made Brad decide he didn't want to try dating her AT ALL. He evidently cared quite a bit for her, so I just can't make 1 +1 add up to 2 here.

    Anyway, thanks for coming to the FORT and posting your thoughts.
    Don't bore us, get to the chorus. - M. Campbell

  10. #5040
    FORT Aficionado echo226's Avatar
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    Re: Thoughts & Comments in General #4 **Spoilers** - Bachelor 11

    Originally Posted by echo226
    Easy there.

    Do you know why he wasn't didn't seem as protective of Jenni and DeAnna's feelings, as he was of Hillary's ?

    I do think this is something that seems very skewed.

    You said earlier that he wasn't too displeased with the edits. How about tonight ?

    Quote Originally Posted by babyfaceC;2681587;
    given that tonight's 42 minutes covered about 5 to 6 days of filming, he wasn't displeased with the edit... as far as seeming protective, I don't know what to say... I didn't see a difference. Maybe you can be more exact on that...
    Well they made a big deal about it on the WTA. That he tried to hint to Hillary BIG time, within the contractual parameters, that he considered her just a friend.

    With Jenni and DeAnna, I didn't see any hints. Now maybe there were some and we just didn't see them ... in fact we saw the reverse ... with asking about the toilet seat ( implying living together) ... and telling Jenni she said the perfect words ( implying he just needed to hear them to make his decision).

    Did they infer too much ? Perhaps but given his interactions with each of them, I think they were both pretty confident that he would make a choice.
    "The way to become boring is to say everything." Voltaire

    " The greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated. "
    Mohandas Gandhi

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