Selma - B17 NO SPOILERS

[fireflyer]

Can somebody post her specific comment about her refusal to kiss Shawn until he commits to her alone? I can't make any sense of her plans... it seems she plans to stay on the show for the entire duration without ever kissing him. I haven't watched enough episodes to be fully confident in my opinion, but at first glance it appears she is faking, AND using her religion as a major crutch.

[Fanny Mare]

Can somebody post her specific comment about her refusal to kiss Shawn until he commits to her alone? I can't make any sense of her plans... it seems she plans to stay on the show for the entire duration without ever kissing him. I haven't watched enough episodes to be fully confident in my opinion, but at first glance it appears she is faking, AND using her religion as a major crutch.

She said her mother wouldn't like it, I dont recall it word for word( sorry) She mumbled it was to do with her religion didn't she .My husband just saw some of it, and he thinks she is a tease. He also thinks she is very attractive, bur still a tease. I dont think Sean will like that game. jmho

[icreality]

Did anybody else pick up on what Chris Harrison said in his blog about Selma? Not sure how to post so I just copied it to here.

"But she felt compelled, out of respect for her parents and their beliefs, to refrain from kissing Sean. I’ll be interested to hear your thoughts on this. Is living like this going to be something that Selma ultimately regrets? Only the individual can make that judgment calls for herself, and this is the path Selma’s chosen for right now."

What do you think he means by the part "this is the path Selma's chosen for right now"
I wonder if it means that she will finally kiss Sean - perhaps when she realizes that her game isn't going too well. Thoughts?

[Fanny Mare]

Did anybody else pick up on what Chris Harrison said in his blog about Selma? Not sure how to post so I just copied it to here.

"But she felt compelled, out of respect for her parents and their beliefs, to refrain from kissing Sean. I’ll be interested to hear your thoughts on this. Is living like this going to be something that Selma ultimately regrets? Only the individual can make that judgment calls for herself, and this is the path Selma’s chosen for right now."

What do you think he means by the part "this is the path Selma's chosen for right now"
I wonder if it means that she will finally kiss Sean - perhaps when she realizes that her game isn't going too well. Thoughts?

Maybe she has second thoughts, not him. Maybe she realizes this is not the way she should choose a husband ( on tv) . I really don't know. I am not sure this is all a game to her though .

[JavaJo]

She's playing a game with him. This is a quote she made to People.com

You said you wouldn't kiss Sean until you were last woman standing. Seriously?
At that moment, I meant it. ... I didn't know if I would end up kissing him. Things change. Life happens. You act on emotion. You'll have to wait and see what ended up happening.

The Bachelor's Selma Alameri: Tierra Has Sean 'So Fooled' - The Bachelor, TV News, Sean Lowe : People.com

[Fanny Mare]

I don't believe that showing affection in public is a bad thing but my mom does. ... Her one simple request was don't make out with somebody on television. ... She didn't mind that I was going to do the show, which is so huge, and she clearly knows that I go on dates and that I've kissed a boy before. It was more for the people in our Arab circle. ... We have such a strong culture and my family is big in my life, so I needed to test Sean to see if he'd respect my family and culture. And it was a huge test for me to see if I could resist.

Did you regret withholding kisses or worry it'd put you at a disadvantage?

Honestly, I never regret anything ... [I was] afraid that he'd take that as [as a sign that] I don't really like him. But Sean is such an amazing man that he totally understood

.I still don't see it as a game. If she is, I think Sean will see through it.

[fireflyer]

Thanks, Fanny, for posting those quotes. After reading them, I'm less impressed than I was before. I guess I'd been under the impression that she felt some religious reasons which caused her to withhold kissing. But it turns out she was abstaining for someone ELSE's religious reasons, not her own. To thine own self be true.

Then she admits she's kissed people before and that she avoided it now solely to appease others,... so essentially she was posing; i.e. putting on airs. I'm wondering what's up with that culture that makes it okay for her to tell the nation she's willing to pretend to respect it? Surely the people in her Arab circle aren't so dumb as to fall for that?

I'm having a hard time explaining myself. Think back to when you were a kid and some other kid wronged you in some way. Then an adult forces the other kid to apologize. Now, let's say the other kid isn't sorry AT ALL and only says the words "I'm sorry" because he was forced to, and then the adult leaves and he wrongs you again, clearly demonstrating that he was totally disingenuous with his fake apology. In the same way, I feel Selma was totally disingenuous with her fake respect of the Arab culture, and she was clearly asking Sean to respect something that she herself DIDN't respect.

Rant over.

[ilja]

I do have a response to what you said fireflyer. Unfortunately, I doubt a post of that nature would be allowed to stand. Basically, Selma is between a rock and a hard place. She can't win no matter what she does. She's just lucky she lives in the U.S.

[Fanny Mare]

I do have a response to what you said fireflyer. Unfortunately, I doubt a post of that nature would be allowed to stand. Basically, Selma is between a rock and a hard place. She can't win no matter what she does. She's just lucky she lives in the U.S.

I agree ilja, she is very lucky.

[Anemic Dog]

What is Arab culture? What is Caucasian culture? Completely meaningless and artificial constructs. It's far more relevant to consider Selma as a product of her own experiences - as someone raised in a specific Iraqi culture currently living within the American culture and choosing to appear on an American game show.

I can see her conflict causing problems, but the way she handled this made her seem like a player. Sean said he eliminated her because she said she wasn't open to new ideas. I'd add that she lost his respect as well, choosing to contradict herself by kissing him.