Chris Harrison Blog

[ilja]

What line, though? Is he supposed to announce what level of intimacy he's on in a current week?

What about the fantasy dates? Is it OK to sleep with someone when you know he slept with someone else last night and will sleep with a third person tomorrow night? Isn't that a lot more tacky than some naked kissing in front of a television crew?

It's hard to feel outrage over this show. It's not real. Blakeley may feel she's "real" and Courtney isn't, but the fact of the matter is that there are 25 women in a very un-real situation.

Let's say you were in the early stages of dating a guy. If you found out he kissed another woman passionately, would you care whether he was clothed or not at the time? This show defines tacky. Courtney is the messenger, not the message.

I wouldn't put up with any of this stuff in real life which is why I could never go on a show like this.

It's true that the whole set-up is crazy because basically it's a way for a single man or woman to date a bunch of folks at once without them expecting him or her to be faithful. In the meantime, it's not reciprocal or they get kicked off the show.

With that being said, in this crazy bach world, it is not expected that the bach will be sleeping with anyone until the Fantasy suites which is what made it so sickening because I'm about 95% sure that is exactly what they did. And it made Courtney look like sleaze because she wasn't just skinny-dipping with her boyfriend but she did it in front of all the cameramen and knowing good and well it was going to be shown on TV and full-fledged on the internet.

I realize that in this PC day and age that morals has become a dirty word but I'm going to use it anyway because I am not PC.

Now if you want to do that kind of stuff and it doesn't bother you because you have no morals, that's fine. Just don't be shocked when folks with morals find it tacky. If she were my daughter I would be thinking where have I gone wrong.

And while it would not have bothered me as much that my son bared his all, (yes, I am using a double-standard, again non-PC) if Ben had been my son I would have been extremely disappointed in him for doing that which in essence was showing disrespect for all the other women still there. I expect my son to treat women like ladies and if I heard he did not, I would raise holy cain with him.

As Emily implied in the WTA, once Ben had sex with Courtney, it was all over but the final rose. He was no longer thinking with his heart or with his head between his ears.

[mesachick]

We don't see enough to determine that he "closed himself off" to the other women by skinny-dipping with Courtney. We do see him rather passionately making out with a nearly-nude Nicki in a private room weeks later. We could easily assume, from the editing, that he bedded Nicki and Lindzi in addition to Courtney. Maybe KCB as well, since they filmed her rolling around the hallways of a Swiss hotel that week, desolate.

Remember that we see about .01% of what really goes on in Bachelorville. We only know for certain what's been edited and placed in another context for our consumption. We know that the editing is done from the perspective that there's a story to tell in hindsight.

I don't see that this is a "new" level of tacky. It seems like ordinary tacky bachelor behavior to me.

I completely disagree. Ben definitely shut himself off emotionally from the other women. It's been commented on here and on other boards since the ocean frolick. You absolutely can assume that he had sex with all three in the fantasy suites. That has been something that has been assumed since the show began, it's not anything new. The skinny dipping sex though - hasn't, and again - it was against the rules for Courtney to approach Ben in the manner that she did. She also asked him to come visit her in her room on another night, for another romp in the sack. It is a new level of tacky because no other contestant has straddled the Bachelor, naked, on camera before, especially with so many women left in the house. It reflected very poorly of Courtney and sets a pretty horrid example to other women. You shouldn't have to bed down a man so early in a courtship (I don't think they'd even had a 1 on 1 date yet) to win the guy's heart. Skanky behavior.

[Fanny Mare]

As Emily implied in the WTA, once Ben had sex with Courtney, it was all over but the final rose. He was no longer thinking with his heart or with his head between his ears.

When I asked why Emily didn't leave after the tread lightly comment. You said she was in the bachelor bubble. Couldn't Courtney be in that same bubble? or is this a double standard? As for the sex,we dont know if they had sex, or if the other two that went to fantasy suites had sex.( in the same bachelor bubble) Emily can imply all she likes, she wasn't with any of them.
jmho

[ilja]

When I asked why Emily didn't leave after the tread lightly comment. You said she was in the bachelor bubble. Couldn't Courtney be in that same bubble? or is this a double standard? As for the sex,we dont know if they had sex, or if the other two that went to fantasy suites had sex.( in the same bachelor bubble) Emily can imply all she likes, she wasn't with any of them.
jmho

Of course she was in the bubble. I don't believe she would have given Ben the time of day had she met him outside of the Bachelor.

That doesn't excuse her exposing herself for all the world to see.

If she did do anything nice up until they started trying to reform her, then obviously those scenes were left on the cutting room floor. Unfortunately, at this point, after seeing her say everything that we did, it's too late for most to believe anything coming out of her mouth.

Some have suggested that she has all the typical signs of someone who was abused. If one of the rumors going around is true, then she would have at the least been subjected to stuff no young girl should have to see. It would help explain why she is so messed up. Or did they actually say that on the home town date? If so, I did not hear it.

I am hoping that she learns from all of this and reassesses her priorities. She is still young and it's not too late to turn things around. If she needs help, I hope she gets it.

[Fanny Mare]

Of course she was in the bubble. I don't believe she would have given Ben the time of day had she met him outside of the Bachelor

I think she would of .She said she liked when he was on Ashley's season.

[mesachick]

I think she would of .She said she liked when he was on Ashley's season.

So did a lot of the women. The majority of which, now find him a total turn off. Courtney says a lot of things, I don't believe most of what she says. She says what she thinks will make her "win", that's about it.

[Fanny Mare]

You have your opinion, I have mine.

[Anemic Dog]

People assume a lot of things from just a few carefully-edited montages of action. Just because a lot of people make the same assumption doesn't make it accurate.

I do object to the use of "morals" above. It seems very haphazard. People can have a strong moral code, but not have a Puritanical (common to America) view of nudity. To be consistent, one could easily say appearing on The Bachelor at all implies a less stringent moral code than many.

[ilja]

People assume a lot of things from just a few carefully-edited montages of action. Just because a lot of people make the same assumption doesn't make it accurate.

I do object to the use of "morals" above. It seems very haphazard. People can have a strong moral code, but not have a Puritanical (common to America) view of nudity. To be consistent, one could easily say appearing on The Bachelor at all implies a less stringent moral code than many.

I'm shocked, I tell you, shocked!

I think I was pretty explanatory in my post. I personally do not find it puritanical to not want to go naked in front of folks with cameras and have the video go viral. But hey, if it is, then call me puritanical and I will wear that badge proudly. hugegrin.gif

As Fanny said, you have your opinion and I have mine. BTW, I do live in America and I love it.

I've also enjoyed our back and forth, believe it or not. We are different which is what makes posting on discussion forums so much fun. It's kind of nice to discuss differences over a TV show like The Bachelor instead of something serious where one of us would likely be banned. I love hearing what other people think.

[sweetpea]

I have to agree that within the usual boundaries of this ridiculous show there is a kind of unspoken understanding that the Bachelor won't get really intimate physically with a girl until the F3 fantasy suites. Of course, they will kiss, etc, but no naked intimacy. Ben broke all those rules, and really early on when there were still what, 10 girls left? Courtney initiated it and of course Ben could have demurred, but he was too thrilled with the idea to even think of saying no, and as a result Courtney leapfrogged the rest of the girls and he never looked back, IMO.

It's not the skinny dipping that bothers me, frankly, it's the fact that I really believe Ben should have kept the playing field level at that point, just out of respect for the other women and to (as ridiculous as this is to say) honour 'the process.' Courtney was doing whatever it took to get his attention and put herself front and centre. I get that. But I think Ben should have thought a little harder and said "no."