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Thread: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

  1. #221
    FORT Fogey rileymeboy's Avatar
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by KatesMom View Post
    I honestly can't decide what I think about AshLee. I think her main goal was to hurt and embarass him. But did she do it out of hurt feelings or did she do it, plain and simple, for revenge (think bunny boiler)? She says she doesn't have feelings for him anymore. Then why do it? So while I agree she wasn't acting - and I do think Sean was telling the truth, I'm not completely sure what her underlying motivation was.
    I think when she said she didn't have feelings for him anymore, she was saying either what she was told to say or simply trying to protect herself from showing further emotions. I think she stills cares a lot and is trying very hard not to let that hurt show. Unfortunately, it came out when she ask Sean "why he sent her home" when he responded with "I realized, I wanted more fun in my life and I could not have it with you." That was a cruel thing for Sean to say, in doing so, he made it a personal issue. it would have been better with simply saying what he said to everyone else, he had stronger feelings for the other two girls. She probally said things she had not planned to say..especially his feelings about the girls. Then her hurt, anger & emotions all exploded and we saw the results. She remained seated for a while after the other girls were leaving. You could tell she was trying to bring herself under control.

    I feel very sorry for Ashley, I hope she will be able to move forward again very soon.
    She is probally a very nice woman who is fighting her own demons and was not ready for the experience of this show.
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  2. #222
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by AlwaysVeg View Post
    I think it was both hurt feelings and the desire to hurt and embarrass him. One leads to the other. That's what revenge is all about!
    Bingo! Of course she wanted to toss him a jab. She was devastated and angry. Sean did lead them all on, too much. Really he did.
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  3. #223
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by Shoepie View Post
    Bingo! Of course she wanted to toss him a jab. She was devastated and angry. Sean did lead them all on, too much. Really he did.
    He didn't lead them on anymore than the others leads have. Sean was devastated when Emily let him go, I didn't see him take a round out of her though.
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  4. #224
    FORT Fogey KatesMom's Avatar
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by rileymeboy View Post
    I think when she said she didn't have feelings for him anymore, she was saying either what she was told to say or simply trying to protect herself from showing further emotions. I think she stills cares a lot and is trying very hard not to let that hurt show. Unfortunately, it came out when she ask Sean "why he sent her home" when he responded with "I realized, I wanted more fun in my life and I could not have it with you." That was a cruel thing for Sean to say, in doing so, he made it a personal issue. it would have been better with simply saying what he said to everyone else, he had stronger feelings for the other two girls. She probally said things she had not planned to say..especially his feelings about the girls. Then her hurt, anger & emotions all exploded and we saw the results. She remained seated for a while after the other girls were leaving. You could tell she was trying to bring herself under control.

    I feel very sorry for Ashley, I hope she will be able to move forward again very soon.
    She is probally a very nice woman who is fighting her own demons and was not ready for the experience of this show.
    On this one, I will agree with you. I think he was being honest, and I don't think he meant it in a negative or hurtful way, but I'm sure hearing that hurt. I'm sure AshLee is painfully aware of the fact that she is not the "fun" one. I think her life circumstances have made it very hard for her to be that way. While it was true, I think saying that to her is probably what sent her over and made her change into wanting to hurt him back.
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  5. #225
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    I think AshLee is a very needy person. She still has abandoment issues because of things that occured before she was four years of age? That's crazy. From the time she was four she was loved by a couple that cared for her, clothed her, fed her and probably gave her more than her fair share of TLC. She repays that love and kindness by letting the first four years of her life define who she is. As was mentioned above by AZChristian, she's held on to her hurt for 28 years. I guess she'll hold on to her hurt from Sean for the rest of her life. Won't it be fun for someone to marry a person who can't let go of past hurts?
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  6. #226
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by Photobabe View Post
    I think AshLee is a very needy person. She still has abandoment issues because of things that occured before she was four years of age? That's crazy. From the time she was four she was loved by a couple that cared for her, clothed her, fed her and probably gave her more than her fair share of TLC. She repays that love and kindness by letting the first four years of her life define who she is. As was mentioned above by AZChristian, she's held on to her hurt for 28 years. I guess she'll hold on to her hurt from Sean for the rest of her life. Won't it be fun for someone to marry a person who can't let go of past hurts?
    Generally I agree with you in that we all have a choice to let our past define us or be what we learn and grow from. The only hesitation I have here is what I have read about children (think about the kids adopted from Russia) and what I have witnessed in my own. All those bonds and learning how to love and trust happen in the first 3 years of life. If that is the period during which she was shuttled around, potentially abused and had no one to bond with - who really knows how that kind of early devastation can stay with you your entire life, regardless of what happens after. I have no idea, so I hesitate to judge in this particular circumstance.

    That being said, I totally blame the producers on this one. No way did this personality issue not make itself blatantly clear during the casting process . . . not with everything they have to go through. This was MF, pure and simple, deciding that she would be a good "character" to bring drama. And she did - 2 days later we are still talking about her. She never should have been on this show. Given her past and her issues, this type of situation was probably the worst possible one to put her in.
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  7. #227
    FORT Fogey rileymeboy's Avatar
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    This was well said, I agree totally.

  8. #228
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by Shoepie View Post
    I think Ashlee brought up the subject of the other girls in the FS. Most do that at some point, fishing for an answer that will make them feel secure. Sean could have said, I am not thinking about the other girls; I am here with you now. He definately said something that was easily misconstrued. I do not think Ashlee is delusional, not at all. Had she never brought up her background I don't think we would be seeing so many think she is skewed.
    Since I don't think Ashlee is totally off base I am going to amend what I think he might have said.

    Ashlee: what are your feelings for the other girls? Or, do you have strong feelings for the other girls?"

    Sean, I am here with you and I only have feelings for you right now. Or, you mean the world to me. : Okay, just kidding on the last one.

    When you get right down to it, what in hell does that expression mean? I think the world of you. Let that crash around you skull for a minute or two. Nothing, right?
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  9. #229
    FORT Fanatic Pandora2's Avatar
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by AZChristian View Post
    If she hasn't gotten over being abandoned in almost 30 years (in spite of a loving adoptive family), I can see where she wouldn't have gotten over being eliminated in 3 months. That's why she journals - so she won't forget who she needs to blame for all of her problems.
    OK I know we're not supposed to post here if only to say that we agree with something that was said, but I think this is perfect and the "like" button just didn't seem enough. And thanks for the chuckle!
    AZChristian likes this.

  10. #230
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    Re: 3/4 Bachelor 17: The Women Tell All **West Coast Spoilers**

    Quote Originally Posted by KatesMom View Post
    Generally I agree with you in that we all have a choice to let our past define us or be what we learn and grow from. The only hesitation I have here is what I have read about children (think about the kids adopted from Russia) and what I have witnessed in my own. All those bonds and learning how to love and trust happen in the first 3 years of life. If that is the period during which she was shuttled around, potentially abused and had no one to bond with - who really knows how that kind of early devastation can stay with you your entire life, regardless of what happens after. I have no idea, so I hesitate to judge in this particular circumstance.

    That being said, I totally blame the producers on this one. No way did this personality issue not make itself blatantly clear during the casting process . . . not with everything they have to go through. This was MF, pure and simple, deciding that she would be a good "character" to bring drama. And she did - 2 days later we are still talking about her. She never should have been on this show. Given her past and her issues, this type of situation was probably the worst possible one to put her in.
    I don't know what the casting process is or how in depth they go. Contestants can easily choose what to say in an interview to make them more desirable. This is just a reality show and producers or casting agents cannot be held responsible for fragile psyches. It is impossible to know. Casting is not a business that probes deeply into the psychology of each contestant. Ashlee has some residual issues from her past but we all do.

    If you explore the history of some famous people who have contributed to our society or just had mad success, some have horrific or fascinating stories.

    Abandonment issues are low on the list of red flags. Killing and skinning neighborhood cats would be tricky. But would they tell casting? Nope.

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