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Thread: If Simon was a judge...

  1. #1

    If Simon was a judge...

    What do you think Simons opinions would be or what he would have said about each of the finalists?

  2. #2
    This is what Simon would say:

    AJ melendez - Being ah pop stah, eet takes mo thun singing, and I'm soowy, but your imuge iz ooohh-ful. First of oool, wutz wid the shirt? eet lookz like you just came back from Hawaii. This izn't ah luau, thiz is ah singing contest. You remind me of Justin Gurini on crack.

    Chantel - I must say, i wuz imperess wit you're ooo-ditions, but you huv gone down heel ufter dat. You look like 23, nut 13.

    Chauncey - You look like ah scared kitty kat who just ran out on thee high away. Work on being mo confident. Until den, don't expect to make it in dis group.

    Danielle - you sound good, but you do realize dis eeez ah pop group. I would put you in ah play. I need to see mo frum you. If we were selling teddy bearz tho, I'd choose you.

    Jordan - You ah cute and all. You look like the ol american pop star, but I hope you don't mind not gettin many lead vocals, cause yo voice eezn't as strong as most. See if you cun raise yo game next time. How-eva you'd look good on mugazine coovahs.

    Katelyn - I like wot I'm seeing. eeeef you can avoid stumbling down de stretch, you huv ah good chunce.

    Morgan - You should be in ah solo. Not shua how the duynamics of de group would be eeef you got into it. Eeetz like you are from unotha planet. Planet nevah nevah land.

    Lucy - I am surry mah deer, dis group needz ah strong female singah, and Katelyn is beating you. Howevah, if you cut yo hair short, you'd look eerily similah to a young Donnie Osmond.

  3. #3
    I wish Simon could have been a judge from the very first auditions...keeping his comments amongst the other judges as to not hurt the kid's feelings. I think we would be watching a totally different show right now!

  4. #4
    (british accent of course...)
    (from the last performance show - 1970)

    AJ - No originality whatsoevah, we need a staH, not the next Justin Guarini. YoH like a Justin clone gone wrong.YouH look is horrendous,
    yoH voice needs more training..it's appalling! I'm serious! The boy band era was ovah when yoH were born...if you get into this group, America will have had it wrong.

    KATELYN - you put me half to sleep here. It was the most painfully boring experience i've evah had in mah entiah life. If you are looking to be in this business, based on that puhfohmance you are a model, and only a model. If you can prove me wrong, you will be in the group.

    MORGAN - You came out here with tramendous energy, I commend you foh yoH enthousiasm although...I have to say...it didn't impress me whatsoevah. Performance was horrific. The one thing I can say is you looked like a fool. Your voice was good...just good..nothing out of the ordinary, good.

    CHANTEL - You have a strong voice, although.. this was yoH worst performance yet. You can do much bettah, that was absolutely dreadful.

    JORDAN - You have the image, and perform like a staH. Vocally, this was not yoH best. I've seen bettah, but this wasn't it. Pay more attention to yoH voice, this is not dancing idol. You did well..although, to make this a real competition, were raising the bar here, and you're not even close to it.

    DANIELLE - I would have to say that yoH the only one I sense with the whole package, although it hasn't opened yet. Right now, your incredible voice is the only thing that stands out. You definately have potential, although if you don't show what you've really got, you will not be guaranteed a spot in the group.

    CHAUNCY - You have improved so much from the time this show has started. With each performance you just keep getting bettah and bettah. I commend you foH that. I think you've got a chance.

    LUCY - excellent singer, mature voice, although during this performance you looked like you were in pain reaching the higher notes. Wonderful, although I just can't pictchuH you fitting into the group.

  5. #5
    question... why does made up simon seem to hate aj???

  6. #6
    hey y'all i think simon is a great judge, unlike the others, he tells the people what they need to hear, not what they want to hear, however i dont mean to be rude but they would need a consuler for the kids if he was a judge but hey y;all i love simon

  7. #7
    Big Blue - Tayshaun! superfly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    no accent for me

    AJ - First off, I'd suggest staying out of Ryan Seacrest's wardrobe because that shirt is absolutely dreadful. This song choice was totally wrong for you and you sounded like a cat "mewing"

    Chantel - What are you doing on American Juniors? You look like you're 31, not 13. You have a powerful voice but you have not shown off what i believe you are capable off. Stoney End was an absolutely horrible song choice.

    Chauncey - You were much better this week. You worked hard and it showed. Good work, keep it up.

    Danielle - You are probably the best singer in the competition. Your performances so far have been flawless vocally, however since this is a pop group, you need to show more personality on stage.

    Jordan - Not as good as last week. You were much better vocally last week. However, it was a tough song and I think you pulled it off ok.

    Katelyn - I thought this was a singing competition. I don't want to sound rude, but I think you might have been looking for "America's Next Great Model."

    Morgan - What does this look like? The playhouse at McDonalds? I think you have a good voice but you need to tone down your act a bit to show off your vocal ability.

    Lucy - You have the most powerful voice in the competition and have been giving great performances. There are minor pitch problems, but that can be solved. One thing I must mention...and don't take this personally, but your dancing is absolutely horrendous. It rivals that from Keith in the AI2 auditions.

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by superfly
    no accent for me
    Thank you so much for not using a typed accent! I guess it was supposed to be a cute touch, but it's very annoying to read. We can imagine the accent in our heads. Yours was the only one I could stand to read, and I agree with it, I can see him saying those things!

  9. #9
    If Simon was a judge, this show would have big ratings. Idol wouldn't have caught on as big as it did, without the insults from Simon. Remember, Idol really hyped up the show by showcasing Simon's insults that originally got a lot of people watching Idol.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by yahright
    If Simon was a judge, this show would have big ratings. Idol wouldn't have caught on as big as it did, without the insults from Simon. Remember, Idol really hyped up the show by showcasing Simon's insults that originally got a lot of people watching Idol.

    This show needs some hype...bring on Simon!!!!!

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