ANTM Cycle 9 Premiere Recap 09/19/07 – Pirate Wenches of the Caribbean

[hepcat]

Originally Posted by Lulu_9289

LOL great recap loved it, I know I might be late but what happen to snowy?

Snowflakegirl is taking some time off to recharge.

I’m off to book my cruise – the mini-golf course sold me.

The ice skating rink got me!

Ajane, fantastic recap and thanks for jumping in feet first!

[Google]

 

[CrazyClownSmile]

I don't know about you but I am quite upset that Jaslene won last cylce. It was nice when you said,

'where Cycle 8 winner Jaslene is participating in a staged photoshoot. Jaslene, looking even more starved than she did last season, gives the girls a skeletal grin and enthuses over her new life as a (reality-show competition winner) model.'

I haven't talked to many people who agree with me that Jaslene looks like a skeleton.

[spinozasright]

Originally Posted by AJane

...Ambreal, 19, makes a squealing, arm-waving entrance, then proceeds to underwhelm the trio with her “ghetto walk”. Because nothing says couture like a “ghetto walk”, I suppose. Ambreal is under the delusion that she’s “good at walks...”

...Plus, Jenah is smart, because she reads books and stuff. Yale-girl Victoria is probably convulsed with laughter backstage. [/i]

Me too!

Thanks for the giggles AJane! Especially the snark about poor Jaslene... Gosh, I still can't believe how they set that poor girl up for huge disappointment. Although I imagine it wasn't terribly hard for her to fit the show into her "bookings."

[ANTM Lovher]

Recap, was right on the money! I missed the premiere on Wednesday but, I watched it tonight. I di not have to if, I knew the recap was soooooo on point and much more entertaining!

[antmluva1234]

did anyone notice...they showed 7 of 8 winners excluding Adrianne as they always do...then they showed 7(of maybe 6) runners-up,and RENNE?

they didnt show Natasha?

[CelineCarey]

Originally Posted by AJane

We’re skipped ahead to breakfast the following day, where the girls are having a spirited discussion about eating disorders. That is – an obnoxious, bitchy girl by the name of Marvita is loudly accusing Ebony of having one. Marvita’s nastiness gets the other models worked up, and they fret over their own sylph-like figures. I assume any mad dashes to the restrooms were edited out.

.[/i]

Actually, Ebony was the witch in that altercation. She was the one with the "Lets play a game, who here is anorexic?" Marvita was telling her that wasn't nice, why would you say something like that, are you anorexic, etc. Ebony was the aggressor and that's why the witch made the cut.

[SnowflakeGirl]

Am I too late to talk like a pirate? Yaaaaargh, ayast ye scurvy mateys, this be one cracking good recap, methinks the writer won't be walking the plank this fortnight. Savvy? (No? Neither do I. )

Beautiful job, AJane! I was chortling heartily throughout the entire recap, which was hilarious and absolutely on point from start to finish.

For example:

Originally Posted by AJane

Welcome, fashion mavens and those who are
following Tyra Banks’ yo-yo’ing dress size

According to Ty-ty, beauty comes in many forms, and isn’t necessarily what you may think it is. Translation: there will be some homely-ass girls among the 33 finalists.

The girls are bid to put on blindfolds, and when they remove them, they have the dubious treat of seeing Miss Jay Alexander, dressed as the Love Boat’s Captain Stubing. This may be the first time I’ve ever seen Miss Jay in pants. (Leggings don’t count.)

In case there isn’t enough reason to hate 33 young, thin, gorgeous women, we’re shown clips of the cruise ship, which is sumptuously appointed with golf courses, swimmin’ pools, and movie stars.

Heather – who claims to have a “hump” on her back, though I don’t see it under the life vest – horrifies Miss Jay with her walk, which is half pimp-roll and half praying mantis.

Heather is either deaf, a doormat or a spectacular good sport, because she takes no offense at the girls’ digs.

While Tyra may be equal to the size of the late Ms. Munroe, she can’t pull off the Betty Boop voice. But it’s her show, after all, and the girls politely applaud her effort.

You're so right...Tyra is not exactly in the running for the next Pussycat Doll

Sylvia, one of the group’s senior citizens at age 23, is asked by Tyra to do “interpretive walking” – meaning, she has to pretend to be a high-fashion butterfly, robot, and centipede. The power is going to your head, Tyra – it’s not pretty.

Personally, I’ve found any kind of children’s camp to be anything but good for one’s self-esteem. Saleisha claims to have had a fabulous experience, though, and her self-esteem is just fine now, thanks for asking. It must be, because she wants to model for Victoria’s Secret and Sports Illustrated, where there isn’t as much high fashion as there is T&A.

Jenah, another 18-year-old, confidently announces that girls don’t like her because she’s beautiful. Wow, I can think of other reasons not to like her already. Plus, Jenah is smart, because she reads books and stuff. Yale-girl Victoria is probably convulsed with laughter backstage.

Jaslene, looking even more starved than she did last season, gives the girls a skeletal grin and enthuses over her new life as a reality-show competition winner model.

She should have banned the use of the word “fierce”, and really made them sweat.

It was real pleasure to read your perspective on this Cycle. Thank you so much for sharing your wit and unique angle with us! Brava, good friend!

[MotherSister]

Fantastic way to start the season, AJane! You sucked me in with the title and I was giggling all the way through.

[Rylani]

Nice enough recap, thanks!