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Old 04-01-2005, 02:50 PM   #11
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very super glad that FORT is back... SFG you rock...
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Old 04-01-2005, 03:25 PM   #12
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absolutely hilarious!! as usual *faints*

oh you missed keenyah in the last part... where Tyra calls back the girls in roder
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Old 04-01-2005, 04:06 PM   #13
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perfect recap

Wow, SFG, you just summed that episode up perfectly didn't you? I am a big fan of Michelle's. I think this gal has a lot of inner strength she needs to tap into. Her 800-flowers and zodiac photos were great, the photographers raved about working with her, and God, it takes a lot of Chutzpa to "come out" as bi on national TV. In the photographer from hell:tennis pictures, her's were the only ones that looked like she actually played.
Kind of glad Noelle left: She looks a great deal like Chelsea Clinton in her photos...definately not "Model". I love Luuvy. She has an interesting face and a killer walk, certainly one of the best struts of the group.
This last episode pointed out that these women are pretty young...most don't have the experience or coping mechanisms and older person has. I modeled (runway) when younger, and I know, it is CRAZY. (The people involved make it so... are there ANY CALM people in the industry who come in, do their job well, and are nice about it?) Maybe that's why I like Michelle: She seems down to earth and her photo shoots are professional.
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Old 04-01-2005, 04:31 PM   #14
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Great recap! I missed it when FORT was down.
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Old 04-01-2005, 04:38 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SnowflakeGirl
Mayhaps all these bitches are evil.

they will partner up and give one another a “clean, fresh, natural look” with [subliminaladvert=buyit]CoverGirl[/subliminaladvert] makeup.

It is easy to see when she is frustrated because she does this odd bunny sniff whenever she’s on the verge of a flip-out. Let’s call it the ‘Angry Bunny’ look.

The next day, they go to the Salon at Beverly Hills where Jay asks them if anyone knows what “haute couture” is. Crickets chirp enthusiastically in response, and Jay and I both are appalled. I can understand not knowing what this is if you’re an auto mechanic in Flushing, but let’s face it, in this world today fashion has so saturated the mainstream, I’ll bet that mechanic is likely to have seen an episode of “Project Runway” and knows his ‘couture’ from his ‘carburetor’. How could you not know, especially if you want to be a model?

Jay outdoes himself when he says Tiffany resembles “a toasted Miss Piggy on crack.”

Smart. Beautiful. Sorry, wrong cosmetics line slogan—[Cover Girl agents descend on SFG household and obtain SFG & her army of Mini-SFG clones.]

Personally, I think Christina’s crazy, homicidal psycho eyes are only intensified by the dark East Indian makeup and dramatic black kohl eyeliner, and in closeup, she looks disturbingly like the lady creature in The Grudge.

Cheers, the FORT Phoenix flies again!
Cent'anni, FORT! And 100 years to you SFG for another great recap.
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Old 04-01-2005, 04:44 PM   #16
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Wonderful recap, Snowy! Your description of the drama was so much more satisfying than watching the show this week. Excellent work!
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Old 04-01-2005, 06:55 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SnowflakeGirl
GET TO WORK IMMEDIATELY, MINI-SFG!!! [Swats at it with small broom]

Trouble Breaks Out (all of the headings were priceless)

My own first thought is, could this be somehow related to those alien crop circles in Signs?

But just the way it is in Mrs. Doubtfire, when Robin William’s kids couldn’t tell it was their own dad under all that spirit gum, the girls are somehow shocked and amazed when this stodgy oldster turns out to be…Jay Manuel in ‘old man make-up’.

[subliminaladvert=buyit]CoverGirl[/subliminaladvert]

Let’s call it the ‘Angry Bunny’ look.

I can understand not knowing what this is if you’re an auto mechanic in Flushing, but let’s face it, in this world today fashion has so saturated the mainstream, I’ll bet that mechanic is likely to have seen an episode of “Project Runway” and knows his ‘couture’ from his ‘carburetor’.

Noelle proceeds to spread this news faster than the red spots on Michelle’s face, whipping all the girls into a Crucible-style mass hysteria based on no evidence whatsoever.

So now she’s a vampire with Ebola. (this was my favorite)

(White woman? I thought they made her into Devon Aoki)

[Cover Girl agents descend on SFG household and obtain SFG & her army of Mini-SFG clones.]

Personally, I think Christina’s crazy, homicidal psycho eyes are only intensified by the dark East Indian makeup and dramatic black kohl eyeliner, and in closeup, she looks disturbingly like the lady creature in The Grudge.

Noelle has that awful smug smirk on again (as if she’s thinking, ‘Oh yeah, I’m safe against fish face here.’).

[Mini-SFG humps the furniture] No, bad Mini-SFG, bad! [sprays Mini-SFG with water bottle]
The FORT is back, and Snowy is back, and she is brimming with genius as usual! Thank you, Snowy, for the high quality yet still mysteriously free entertainment.
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Old 04-01-2005, 08:22 PM   #18
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All o' dem bitches ARE evil, I'm appalled at the bitchiness of the grrrrls this week, and delighted at the awesome recap Snowy, Can you stick one of those mini-SFG clones in a box and mail her to me? I promise to take give her a good home....
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Old 04-01-2005, 08:29 PM   #19
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we should all read a book or something!

I loved the recap Snowflake Girl! I have watched this forum for a while but haven't felt much like posting till now! I think they should have Tiffany's grandmama on the show more often! We could probably all benefit from her pearls of wisdom! Can we start a petition to get her on as a guest judge on some future cycles?
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Old 04-01-2005, 08:53 PM   #20
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B-E-A-U-TIFUL, I love how you tell the facts and then insert subtle opinions. I adored it!
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