Well, boys and girls, Ladies and Gentlemen, Freaks and geeks. I had to try something new this week. I missed the episode I am about to recap because a thunderstorm with the possibility of spawning tornadoes was passing through towns hundreds of miles away from me.
It wouldn’t have been too bad, but we didn’t even get footage of the storms, we got one full hour of Doppler Radar showing us all these pretty green and blue patches over cities I’d never hear of. A full hour of Doppler!!!!!!! I found out later that the channel actually showed TAR in its entirety in the wee hours of the morning. I had no idea, so I didn’t tape it.
I am sure you will enjoy my recap anyway.
I gathered this information in spy like ways. I was stealth in my creeping, copying and pasting, when I was visiting the official site.
These ARE my words, and MY take on the situations…. I hope it doesn’t suck too badly.
Apparently all the teams met up at the train station in Nakulam. (I am blown away here as the official site actually calls David and Jeff “The Dynamic Duo”… Please CBS, don’t give them nicknames…It’s lame. The official site then goes on to tell everyone how David and Jeff did in the entire race, so in the first paragraph you know when they arrived at the roadblock, the detour and the pit stop. Not that I want to give anything away to early like some sites, but apparently it was the same place for all three things. That’s pretty good for a couple of fresh-faced spoilers. I can’t imagine the other teams were too happy.
I find out that this was the episode with all the cab trouble. Every season has one (or two)… or a team that has cab trouble through out.
This episode it was Millie and Chuck (In a cab that got to hot, I find it ironic that they were in something that got too hot) and Reichen and Chip got a cabbie who can’t read a gas gauge, so ran out of gas somewhere. (The official recap could have told us I guess, but they are busy spoiling the ending).
So everyone leaves the Gateway To India, 12 hours after their arrival and of course gets to the train station for the equalizer.
We learn that Jeff thinks he and David could win the whole thing, and that Chip realizes he sometimes makes mistakes, but really wants to win. We get to know that Millie thinks it’s been a rough few legs and that neither her nor Chuck like the way they have been treating each other. I have to think back to previous episodes…… nope can’t come up with any instance where they were mean to each other. Interesting.
Jon and Al let us know that they don’t like the fact that they were so close to elimination and have to stay focused to win the game.
From reading the official recap I learn that it was Tian and Jaree who were in the cab with the lights out. I can imagine what there faces looked like during this harrowing episode, but I’d have liked to have seen it.
So then there was another night of concrete sleeping for Tian and Jaree, Reichen and Chip and Millie and Chuck. I guess other teams either hadn’t arrived yet, or opted for a hotel.
The next morning was the train ride of Kelly’s nightmares. I know you think that happened last week, but apparently her jerk of a boyfriend thought it would be funny if he were the one pinching and groping this time on the train. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t like Kelly at all, but really did Jon have to be so asinine?
On the next train ride, the one that took teams to Ernakulam, there was a smell on the train. Not a good smell by the sound of things. All but one team decided to spend some of the cash and upgrade to train car with A/C. The only team that didn’t want to spend the extra money was Millie and Chuck. I have no idea if this was more Millie’s idea or Chucks, but I would wager that looking back on things now, both wish they’d spent the extra money for the looooooong ride in.
Millie and Chuck (I guess this is a little confessional. Either that or they are talking to the camera while on the train) tell us that at times they feel like they are back on the playground at school. All of the sudden I feel bad as I realize I have been comparing Kelly and Jon to Jr. High school kids… there is no Playground in Jr. High school. Millie and Chuck are right… Kelly and Jon are even more juvenile that I had given them credit for.
To prove my point, we get to see Kelly and Jon once again making fun of Millie and Chuck. They are laughing it up with Reichen and Chip. I have read both the official recap and the comments made here. I have no clue as to whether Reichen and Chip were being jerks too, or if they were laughing due to the fact that they were uncomfortable being in the presence of the name calling. I hope it’s the latter, but I really couldn’t tell from the preview alone.
Everyone got to Ernakulam, and I guess hop in cabs heading for either the detour or the roadblock.. I’ll let you know as soon as I get that far.
Remember back in the beginning of this recap when I chastised the official recapper for not telling us where Reichen and chip had the cab trouble? Well, darn diddly if the recapper didn’t wind up telling us after all. This is where the trouble started for the couple.
So here they are, a bunch of Americans racing around in a town with a bunch of yellow and red billboards, looking for a green route marker. In that green box teams learn that they must get to Alleppy to find the next clue.
Obviously this is also were Millie and Chuck Heat up… or rather the cab they have hired over heats.
First up is the Roadblock. Bull Racing.. sort of. This game was made up by a bunch of bored farmers. In the official recap it says the game was made up 100 years ago. I have a feeling they heard a bunch of Americans were coming and made the game up 20 minutes before the racers arrived.
One team member (who do you think does it for Tian and Jaree?) must get in line to race. They hold onto a team of bulls and get what appears to be dragged through a 100-yard mud pit. If you can hold on the whole time, you receive your next clue. If not you must get back in line and wait for another turn.
David, Al, Jon (of Jon and Kelly), Chuck, Reichen and Tian performed the stunt for their Teams. Tian was second to go, but let go of the bar on her first trip, and had to get back in line. It sounds like Jaree was really supportive of Tian throughout the entire bull ride, and it was really nice to see… well, I’m assuming that, since I’ve actually only read it.
Next up is the Detour. Here we have the option of choosing baskets or trunks. If a team chooses baskets they must “load 10 live chickens into baskets on a traditional bicycle-powered wagon and navigate to a farm circled on an enclosed map”. Teams choosing trunks must “load two bales of traditional Indian fabric known as coir onto an elephant and navigate to the coir shop circled on the enclosed map.”
David & Jeff, Jon & Al, Kelly & Jon, Millie & Chuck and Tian & Jaree decided to go for Trunks This is were we as an audience heard Kelly use the word “cookie” when referring to her private parts. Gee Kelly… cookie? Oh god, how could you? Bad enough that you are too immature to use the correct terminology if you warrant the comment, but to replace it with cookie?
Nabisco should sue, as there are people (men and women) across the world that will never be able to eat a cookie again. I would wager that one of the only places that sales of cookies don’t decrease dramatically would be DC, as we were watching the freakin’ Doppler screen… sorry I digress once again. Back to the action…
Reichen & Chip opted for baskets and quickly packed the bicycle wagon with chickens and I assume headed off in the right direction to deliver the chickens to wherever they needed to be.
Teams then learn that the next Pit Stop is the Finishing Point Where again I will work on the assumption that not only is Phil there to meet the teams, but that there is also a local person there to welcome the racers in.
1. David and Jeff
2. Jon and Al
3. Kelly and Jon
4. Millie and Chuck
5. Reichen and Chip
Which means of course that the only other strong female team the race had is out of the competition. Tian and Jaree had their problems, but I have to admit they ran a damn good race. I will actually miss them, and wish they’d been around for a few more episodes.
I certainly hope they had as much fun running the race, as I have watching it.
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