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Thread: “Are You Watching? It’s HOCKEY!” 7-27 recap

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    Soccer Kicks Balls cali's Avatar
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    “Are You Watching? It’s HOCKEY!” 7-27 recap

    Every week I have been taking my titles from quotes heard at Casa de Cali during the show. This week the honor (?) of creating the title goes to an actual board member who called me during the show to make sure I was watching “Cali it’s Little Z, are you watching? It’s HOCKEY”. So props to Little Zdeno with grand total of 9 posts… all in the hockey thread, for making me smile this week.

    Last week I mentioned that I’d been having a rough week. I received lots of PM’s and great posts wishing me well. I feel bad. It’s been crazy here, yes, but I didn’t mean to give the impression that things weren’t OK. Everything is fine here, and it’s looking like next week things will get back to normal… perhaps enough so that I can actually get the recap up on Wednesday.

    So, onto the recap:

    The Particulars

    This week contestants will drive away from the Pit Stop and grab a bus, take the 20 hour trip to Buenos Aries, and catch a flight to St Petersburg Russia. Once in Russia they need to find the Battleship Aurora were the next clue is waiting.

    The Detour send players to one of two places. This weeks choice is Block 5 Shots or Drink 1 Shot. If they choose option number one, I will get a call from Little Zdeno as the players must suit up and stand side by side in a hockey goal as they try to block 5 slap shots from pro Hockey players. If they choose option 2 teams must take a longer ride, grab a saber, balance a shot of vodka on the blade, tip it, drink it, and bring the saber down without dropping the glass. I am almost hoping there will be teams that need to try this 11 or 12 times. Teams will then receive a clue sending them to the center of town and the monument to Peter The Great, called The Bronze Horseman. Once there contestants find that they must go to the town of Pushkin and find the Old Tower Restaurant there they get directions for the…

    Roadblock. Teams read that the player deciding to participate in the Roadblock must “Have A Taste For The Good Life”. Yeah… what they really have to have is a lack of taste buds. The team member must eat 1 kilogram of Caviar. That’s over two pounds. For comparison a loaf of bread weighs 1 pound, a bag of chips with 12 servings weighs less than 1 pound, a regular chicken egg weighs 2 ounces, and a five-pound bag of sugar weighs… oh… well… 5 pounds. What I’m trying to get at is that 1 kilogram of caviar is a hell of a lot. Once the player finishes the bowl, they will take a horse drawn sleigh to…

    The Pit Stop, which is located on the grounds of Catherine’s Palace a short ride away. Phil will of course greet them, and I am of course jealous. Again.

    Leaving in the order in which they arrived, we begin the race:

    Colin and Christie 3:10 am

    They are the first to arrive at the bus station, and find a man who seems to be the only employee in the joint. They are questioning him about bus schedules when another team arrives and interrupts. This makes Colin remark that he “Hates Her”. I’ll let you all wonder for a few minutes who he could possibly be talking about. At the station we have what I refer to as a Great Equalizer, as all teams get to the station before any ticket windows open. A team, to be named at a later time, has given everyone numbers, so there won’t be fighting when the window opens. Colin and Christie aren’t upset by this, as they are first. Colin decides to check another schedule and learns of an express bus that leaves 2 ½ hours later, but arrives at the same time. He switches lines and some other teams follow. There’s a slight argument (again, I’ll get into that with another paragraph). Colin decides that the best thing to do is buy 4 sets of tickets to ensure that certain teams do not get on the express. After purchasing the tickets he, Christie and the 3 new “allied” teams head to a ticket agent to get a leg up on the flight situation. Colin and Christie get reservations on the best flight. When the bus arrives…10 minutes after the non-express… they go straight to the flight and get to St. Petersburg via Sao Paulo and Paris. Once they receive the clue for the Detour, they waste no time deciding to take a shot rather than block 5. Unfortunately they both get the shot down on the first try. I only say unfortunately because I thought it would be funny to see drunk people playing with swords. I’m weird that way. So the two are doing fine and head off for the Road Block where it’s decided that Christie has a taste for the good life. She lifts her spoon… or perhaps I should say Godzilla’s spoon, as this sucker is huge… and is gagging terribly by bite number three. By the fourth or fifth spoonful, and understand that she has yet to put a dent in the amount to be eaten, she’s crying. Other teams are coming and eating. Other teams are finishing and leaving. Colin is actually very nice during all this, and tries his best to cheer her on. She does manage to finish, and the duo go to the Pit Stop and arrive…

    Charla and Mirna 3:21 am

    Our first shot of the team is one of them running to the car where Charla is carrying everything. I guess Mirna needed two hands to open the door for her. Whatever. If you didn’t figure out that Colin was speaking of Mirna at the train station, well heck, I’m surprised. I have to say that Mirna may not be the nicest in the bunch, but teams seem to really…really dislike her. Once she follows Colin and Christie to the second ticket counter to see about the express bus, she runs into her old pall Marshall, who cut her off before she could say anything and told her not to talk to him. She decides that other teams are criminals and lets us know at home, that she doesn’t like criminals. The two pull the “I’m a dwarf so I need priority stand by tickets” crap again for a Swiss Air Flight. I’m really not sure that they even look for another flight, as the next time we see them Charla is saying they were counting on the Swiss Air. Yeah, well, they didn’t get on it so they scramble trying to find a new flight. The cousins fly from Buenos Aries to Frankfurt to St. Petersburg. After receiving the Detour clue they opt for the Shot. Once they are in the cab they both admit that what they really want to do is Block 5. Charla and Mirna head off to the rink, prompting my second call from Little Z. Now, I want you all to know that when I laughed at Charla in her protective gear, it wasn’t at all malicious. I just think she looked funny as heck. She got help from a ref to the goal. Have you ever seen a Pro Hockey goalie standing in front of the net? They dwarf it… well the net had the opposite affect on Charla.
    Sorry, that was really lame.
    They manage to get the shots blocked, and head off for the statue, they get the clue and have the cab drive them to the restaurant. It’s up to Charla to eat the eggs for the Roadblock. I am honestly feeling bad now, as I’m laughing again because of the Godzilla sized spoon. It looks huge when the others are using it. So Charla eats away, and seems to do a good job. They two get the clue, run to the sleigh, head to the Pit Stop and arrive…

    Brandon and Nicole 3:54 am

    I’m so tired of hearing that they are Christians. I’d rather watch people act “Christian” than spend all their time telling us. Oops, there I am on my soap box again. My bad. The “dating Models” arrive at the train station with the other teams and get on the express bus. They have been to the travel agent but decide to ditch their new pals as soon as they get off the bus. Is anyone surprised? Upon reaching the airport, they call the travel agent again and learn of a different flight. This doesn’t sit well with other teams, but the good Christians don’t care. Nicole even remarks that they want to teach others about the Lord, but will play however they have to, to win. Okely Dokely honey. Their flight path goes from Buenos Aries to Sao Paulo to London and finally to St. Petersburg, where they quickly find the battleship and head off to block shots as their Detour, as good Christians don’t drink. They only lie and backstab. Nicole is a whiny little lady the entire time. She doesn’t like dressing up, she doesn’t like standing on the ice, she doesn’t like the players, she doesn’t like the ice, she doesn’t like anything. Brandon blocks four and Nicole accidentally blocks one, so they receive the clue sending them to the Horseman. They arrive at the restaurant and for some reason, Nicole, who we’ve established doesn’t like anything, is the one performing the [I]Roadblock[/b]. Nicole does give us a great quote by letting us know that swallowing the caviar is like swallowing a loogie. Ewwww, but also HAHAHAHA. Nicole does enjoy the good life. So much so that she wants to spend the rest of the race there. She even takes a nap in the middle of eating the caviar. Yes people, she lays down in the back. Somehow Brandon talks her into finishing, and they grab a sleigh, head to the Pit Stop and arrive…

    Bob and Joyce 4:22 am

    The dating pair arrive at the train station and decide to assign numbers to all the teams so there is no fighting once the windows open. Some folks are OK with this, others kind of roll their eyes and flare their nostrils. The team gets on the slow bus, arrive at the airport and run into some crappy luck. It seems as though the ticket agent messed up the reservations, and after being at the airport for a while they need to start all over. The flight they manage to get will deliver them to St. Petersburg via Madrid and Frankfurt. I guess there was just more going on with some of the other teams, as we now see the two deciding to block 5 for the Detour. We don’t get to see a lot of it, and I don’t get a call from Little Z, but Joyce has a blast and Bob takes a bow for the 7 spectators at the rink. These two are having a great time. For the Roadblock it’s Joyce’s turn up to the plate… or bowl as the case may be. She lets us know that the caviar is salty, but other than that there is little complaining shown. Bob and Joyce love the sleigh ride and I love that they took the time to enjoy it. The head for the Pit Stop and meet Phil. They arrive…

    Kami and Karli 5:04 am

    The twins have formed a friendship with the moms, and really enjoy their company. They too, ride the slow bus and get to the airport in good time. Once there they book a flight taking them first to Madrid, then to Paris and finally to St. Petersburg. Wow, here they are, already deciding to go for the 1 shot choice as the Detour. This is turning into a really short paragraph. They have no problem taking their shots, and book it to the statue. They are worried as they don’t know how many teams are behind them. At the Roadblock it’s Karli who eats. We don’t have a lot of footage of this, but it’s obvious that she’s having a hard time. I’m pretty sure she doesn’t take a nap though. They head off for the Pit Stop and arrive…

    Linda and Karen 5:15 am

    As I noted above, the moms have a new friendship with the twins. They are happy with the friendship as both Linda and Karen and Karli and Kami realize that friendship and game are two different things. Neither team is mean about it, they just state it as fact. They find the Aurora, get the Detour clue and head off to take a shot. These two are always having fun, and I like them more every week. Linda will be dining on the caviar and I hate to give anything away, on the off chance that you haven’t seen the episode yet, but I feel the need to share what was said on the way to the Pit Stop. The moms were laughing as they said “We beat the twins in an eating competition, imagine that!”. I love these two. Have I said that already? Yeah, sorry. They arrive…

    Chip and Kim 5:17 am

    Married parents Chip and Kim are tired of being in the back of the pack. They tell us they can’t do anything else wrong, then proceed to get lost on the way to the bus station. The wrong turn, or lack of turn didn’t cost them much time and they get to be assigned a number at the station and wait with the rest of them. I don’t know what goes on at the 12 hour rest periods, but I guess these two made a good impression on Colin as theyu are one of the teams he buys express bus tickets for. They follow Colin over to the travel agent, and get reservations. At the airport they aren’t happy with Brandon and Nicole (Is anyone?), but realize they’re just playing the game. Their flight takes them to Madrid, then onto Frankfurt, then off to St. Petersburg. Kim hears the word “Vodka” as Chip is reading the Detour clue and she needs to know no more. The parents head off for the sabers and drinks downing them well. Once they realize that the Roadblock requires someone who likes the good life, they decide it’s up to Chip. He has one heck of a method, and downs the eggs faster than I down chocolate. That’s mighty freakin’ fast people! He takes a bite, takes a swig of drink, takes a bite, takes a swig, takes a bite etc…. He grabs the next clue and they are happy to learn they are heading to the Pit Stop. They arrive…

    Lance and Marshall 5:34 am

    I’m not giving anything away by now, so we all know they were equalized at the train station, even though they started this leg 2 hours and 24 minutes behind Colin and Kristie. Now I’ll admit that I thought it was kind of weird that Bob and Joyce (who I adore) actually gave out numbers at the station, but man, with the eye rolling these two were doing you would have thought Bob had asked them run or God forbid do a sit up or something. They are still whiny about the number getting, when in reality it didn’t matter as Colin got them tickets anyway. They follow the others to the travel agent and get their reservations too. When they get off the bus they ask for 4 taxi’s, but are shocked when they don’t know where Brandon and Nicole are. When they see the two at the airport they start complaining again. They aren’t happy about Brandon getting the last tickets on the better flight, but Kim doesn’t give them a lot of time to complain before she informs them that Brandon and Nicole are playin’ the game. Marshall and Lance begrudgingly agree. Hmmmm, it’s time to decide which Detour the guys will take… exercise….drink…exercise…drink . Obviously these two want to block some shots so they head off for the ice rink…HAHAHAHAHAHA, no, they don’t silly, they take a shot. Outside they ask some “foreigners” for help and get totally pissed off because the Russians lead them to the statue by walking. Holy crap man, what do you want from these guys? It’s like a mile away! Are you trying to kill them????? Marshall complains for a while, then Lance has to complain a little too. When they finally get to the Roadblock Marshall makes the announcement that he’ll do it in 30 seconds. Then he sees the bowl and utters “Oh my God”. Somewhere in the restaurant I’m sure Brandon and Nicole are thrilled that Marshall is praying. Marshall does finish, but even with the editing (yeah, thanks for the Blair-Witch-under-the-nose-shot) it takes more than 30 seconds. They go to the Pit Stop and arrive…


    Phil, the cool bearded guy, the Palace and The Pit Stop

    1. Chip and Kim (7)
    2. Colin and Christie (1)
    3. Marshall and Lance (8)
    4. Charla and Mirna (2)
    5. Brandon and Nicole (3)
    6. Linda and Karen (6)
    7. Kami and Karli (5)

    Which sadly means Bob and Joyce have finished the race. They are a really likeable pair and I was really sad to see them go. The only good thing is that I know this was a wonderful experience for them and it brought them even closer together. They never had anything bad to say about each other or anyone else (I haven’t read the interview yet, but I’m guessing they still don’t have ill feelings for anyone). They rocked the Race!

    Comments? Email me cali@fansofrealitytv.com or post, I’ll read them all
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    You talkin' to me? 2ctheworld's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cali

    Which sadly means Bob and Joyce have finished the race. They are a really likeable pair and I was really sad to see them go. The only good thing is that I know this was a wonderful experience for them and it brought them even closer together. They never had anything bad to say about each other or anyone else (I haven’t read the interview yet, but I’m guessing they still don’t have ill feelings for anyone). They rocked the Race!
    You bet they rocked the race ... they will be missed by many of us!

    No Suprise ... As always another great re-cap Cali!
    "The Greatest Trick The Devil Ever Pulled Was Convincing The World He Didn't Exist!" --- Verbil Kint, The Usual Suspects

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    Christian,Mom,Teacher mom2's Avatar
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    great recap, cali!
    "Quotes on the internet may not be accurate." - Abraham Lincoln

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    Get recap as usual Cali I'm also sad to see B&J go they were my favorite team! ... Oh well.. let's hope the pizza morons get booted out next week.. *fingers crossed*

    P.s. You missed 4th place in the order of pit stop arrival.. it's ok, I can't count either when my favorite team gets Philiminated

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    FORT Fogey
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    Fantastic job as always, Cali! I love your recaps!

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    What's The 411? Fanatic277's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cali
    If they choose option 2 teams must take a longer ride, grab a saber, balance a shot of vodka on the blade, tip it, drink it, and bring the saber down without dropping the glass. I am almost hoping there will be teams that need to try this 11 or 12 times. …

    Once they receive the clue for the Detour, they waste no time deciding to take a shot rather than block 5. Unfortunately they both get the shot down on the first try. I only say unfortunately because I thought it would be funny to see drunk people playing with swords. I’m weird that way.

    They have been to the travel agent but decide to ditch their new pals as soon as they get off the bus. Is anyone surprised? Upon reaching the airport, they call the travel agent again and learn of a different flight. This doesn’t sit well with other teams, but the good Christians don’t care. to. Their flight path goes from Buenos Aries to Sao Paulo to London and finally to St. Petersburg, where they quickly find the battleship and head off to block shots as their Detour, as good Christians don’t drink. They only lie and backstab.
    As usual, excellent recap Cali. It was sad seeing Bob and Joyce leave, I was hoping that Marshall and Lance would get eliminated but there's always next week.

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    The "christians"

    Cali
    Great recap as usual.

    I'm a regular lurker and look forward to your recaps. I sit at my desk and read them and laugh and enjoy myself. My office mate thinks I am crazy sometimes, but too bad.

    I love your analysis of brandon and nicole. I've not liked them since about the 2nd half of Episode 1. They remind me too much of george and laura bush. Profess to be christians but lie cheat and steal their way to the glory.

    I think he might have made nicole do the caviar because he's the man and we all know the bible tells us the man is the head of the household. You know the old "christian" keep 'em barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen.

    Sorry but they just irritate the crap out of me.

    Darrell

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    Premium Member dagwood's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cali
    Charla and Mirna 3:21 am
    Have you ever seen a Pro Hockey goalie standing in front of the net? They dwarf it… well the net had the opposite affect on Charla.
    Sorry, that was really lame.

    Lance and Marshall 5:34 am

    Hmmmm, it’s time to decide which Detour the guys will take… exercise….drink…exercise…drink . Obviously these two want to block some shots so they head off for the ice rink…HAHAHAHAHAHA, no, they don’t silly, they take a shot.

    Great job, Cali!
    He who laughs last thinks slowest

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    Leo
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    We all love the Cali recap.

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    Hooray for the Calicap! Definitely worth the wait!

    I was glad to find I'm not the only one who noticed the freakishly large spoon.
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