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Thread: Faster Than a Snail's Pace: Jenn & Tracey's TAR week 6 Journal

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    LG.
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    Faster Than a Snail's Pace: Jenn & Tracey's TAR week 6 Journal

    Nope, we're not trying to confuse you. I had a little login glitch this morning, so Tracey (aka LurkingGirl) posted my journal this week for me. I know it's hard to keep us straight sometimes...
    I (Jenn) am aka BravoFan and Tracey is aka LurkingGirl.

    Well gang, it's really great to be back on the road again, just like Willie Nelson, but without the IRS confiscating all of our worldly possessions. We had a great time hanging out with (most of) the teams in Fez during our extra-long layover, but we're ready to continue the battle for the money! This seemed to be a really short leg, which was probably a good thing so we could easily get back into the flow of things and weren't too exhausted. By the time we got to the pit stop today Teri and Ian (who had taken the Fast Forward by tossing expensive Arabian rugs all over some poor storekeepers tent to find a clue which they promptly littered on the sand) had been at the pit stop for a couple hours and were both completely passed out. They were so tired, we've got to wonder how long they can keep with the pace of the younger teams. We were tempted to tell Ian that he'd conserve his energy if he stopped yelling at everyone and everything, but this is a race, so knock yourself out, buddy.

    You may or may not remember that Tracey and I came in to Fez in 4th place behind the brothers teams and Team 911. It was a bright and early start to the day, when we joined the 3 top teams to hire a cab to take us to Casablanca. Along the way, I started daydreaming that I was Ingrid Bergman and Drew and Jeff Byers from Combat Missions (another fantastically fine specimen of reality tv manhood) were vying for my attention in a passionate love triangle. Play it again, Sam!

    A dozen white roses and 5 o'clock stubble
    A hot LA model and equally cute double
    Perfect white teeth with a smile like a king
    These are a few of my favorite things


    Ah, I must have dozed off...and switched movies during the process. But back to reality...I was pretty annoyed with Team 911 sticking to us like white on rice. Unfortunately, with them hanging around it was impossible for us to strategize with our brothers alliance. We all arrived about the same time at the first route marker and then ended up on the same train to Marrakech. To pass time on the train we all played cards for cheese doodles, with Damon being the big winner with more cheese doodles than Flo has whines, ok, not that many, as that many cheese doodles have not yet been made in the whole history of cheese doodledom.

    We knew that John Vito/Jill, Teri/Ian, and Flo/Zach were all battling it out in the 2nd tier groups, but were well ahead of A&A. We really had hoped that John Vito and Jill could break away from that pack.

    Later on at the pit stop we did hear of an unfortunate incident in which Ian took a long enough break from yelling "hooyah" to yell at Flo for attempting to "steal" his taxi. Yet another ugly American moment captured of film for eternity. When this is all done, FOX could air a special: "When Ugly Americans Attack: Caught On Tape" and it will just be clips of Ian all over the world spouting off his nonsense and irritating everyone in his path. We also learned that Flo and Zach missed our train by minutes and ended up taking the second train with the other 2 teams. Ah shucks, as we were so looking forward to hearing her commentary about the accommodations on the train: "Zach, this seat is lumpy and my back hurts. Zach, I'm thirsty. Zach, the train's movement is making me motion sick . . ." Flo, your whining is making us all sick. We figured one of them might go for the fast forward, but we weren't sure who it would be.

    We lost a little ground arriving in Palmarie off the train and were the last of us 4 to make it to the "Now you see it, now you don't" detour. In fact, as we arrived, we ran into Ken and Gerard who told us they had attempted the horse-back riding and digging the clues out of the sand detour. Ken made some funny dog jokes, and told us they were going the sand bikes route and that we should as well. Between the 4 of us, we easily found the rock, didn't run into anything in the process, made our etching of the clue and were on our way to the Glacier Cafe which actually didn't open until 4:45 providing yet another opportunity for the pack to regroup.

    At this roadblock we learned that one of the team members had to help a local food vendor sell five bowls of escargot. All of the teams were bunched up at this point and Tracey took on the task setting up her booth right next to Derek. Tracey remarked that she had no idea that her prior experience working at a both at the Minnesota State Fair in setting up the stand and drawing a willing crowd would prove so helpful. Something that you didn't get to see is that teams had a chance to try the escargot while doing this challenge. Unlike the traditional French preparation of the dish, these snails are steamed with spices rather than drenched in a heavy buttery sauce, and Tracey declared that she loved them and ate a whole bowl. One of the main reasons Tracey had no problem getting customers is that, unlike some of the other teams, Tracey wasn't terrified of her own product, looking scared that it might bite or something. I watched in amazement at Tracey using her "they're soooo good, come on, try them!" sales pitch and negotiation skills to quickly sell her 5 bowls. She even had a 6th offer as she was leaving and sent that one over to Derek to help him out as he was very shy and having a hard time of it. Poor Drew seemed a little frustrated while waiting, but Tracey and I gave him a quick reassuring squeeze, wished him luck as he waited on Derek, and told him that we'd catch them later at the pit stop.

    Fortunately we didn't have the troubles that Team 911 encountered (that would have been really scarey, from what they've told us) and we ended up holding our fourth place spot between Ken/Gerard and Derek/Drew.

    I can't say we were the slightest bit disappointed that Aaron and Adrianne were eliminated. We are so happy they are gone and they can take with them their obsessive hatred of the hottie twins. It seems to have been the undoing of their little alliance, as Flo and Zach are the only team left from that group who was more focused on beating the twins than they were on competing in the race.

    Tracey tells me we may be heading out on the town for a little dancing with the Band of Brothers tonight, so we'd better get ready. Until next week!

    Jenn and Tracey

    Read the next journal entry (Episode 7): Does Losing Your Clue Mean You're Clueless?

    To contact the author of this article, please send an e-mail to BravoFan@fansofrealitytv.com
    Last edited by BravoFan; 12-30-2002 at 09:02 PM.
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  2. #2
    The race is back! John's Avatar
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    Woohoo! You go, girls! Paulie's house is hanging in the balance.

    Excellent journal entry again, ladies.

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    Soccer Kicks Balls cali's Avatar
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    By the time we got to the pit stop today Teri and Ian (who had taken the Fast Forward by tossing expensive Arabian rugs all over some poor storekeepers tent to find a clue which they promptly littered on the sand)

    We were tempted to tell Ian that he'd conserve his energy if he stopped yelling at everyone and everything, but this is a race, so knock yourself out, buddy.

    A dozen white roses and 5 o'clock stubble
    A hot LA model and equally cute double
    Perfect white teeth with a smile like a king
    These are a few of my favorite things

    with Damon being the big winner with more cheese doodles than Flo has whines, ok, not that many, as that many cheese doodles have not yet been made in the whole history of cheese doodledom.


    When this is all done, FOX could air a special: "When Ugly Americans Attack: Caught On Tape" and it will just be clips of Ian all over the world spouting off his nonsense and irritating everyone in his path.

    One of the main reasons Tracey had no problem getting customers is that, unlike some of the other teams, Tracey wasn't terrified of her own product, looking scared that it might bite or something.
    Fantastic read Ladies!
    Fun, fun…
    I can’t help but notice that I quoted many Ian bashing moments… oops!
    He just makes it so easy…..sad really.
    "Rice is great when you're hungry and want 2,000 of something' -- Mitch Hedberg

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    For Your Entertainment lobeck's Avatar
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    You two are doing great...keep it up!

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    It's Chihuly Summer's Avatar
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    On to victory!
    Watch out, It's a stampede!

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    Combat Missions Fan Wolf's Avatar
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    "When Ugly Americans Attack: Caught On Tape" and it will just be clips of Ian all over the world spouting off his nonsense and irritating everyone in his path.
    I'm sure producers have more than enough to make up two shows at least.

    Great job ladies!

  7. #7
    Sexy evil genius Paulie's Avatar
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    Very nice work, you two! As long as you don't slip into the second tier, I think my house will be all right.

    "cheese doodledom"
    When you're ten years old and a car drives by and splashes a puddle of water all over you, it's hard to decide if you should go to school like that or try to go home and change and probably be late. So while he was trying to decide, I drove by and splashed him again. - Jack Handey

    Read Paulie's Precaps for Survivor:Vanuatu: 1-2-3-4-5

  8. #8
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    Great job girls!! Most of my fav lines have already been quoted above, but this one was missing..
    Ah, I must have dozed off...and switched movies during the process. But back to reality...
    Love it!

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