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Thread: Episode 2 - The Pageant Continues

  1. #1
    hellooooooo sher's Avatar
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    Episode 2 - The Pageant Continues

    As I was sitting watching All American Girl, I realized something. There is no flow to this show. Itís very choppy and chock full of commercials. I kind of feel like Iím watching tiny little pieces of whatís actually going on. I kind of feel like the people doing editing should be fired. I thought that about the first episode as well, but figured it was because it was the premiere episode Ė a billion girls, tons of activities, trying to narrow down the playing field to 15. Understandable. But this is episode 2. There are only 15 girls and they are broken down into only THREE teams. We should get to see all of the girls and get to know a little about each of them. That is simply not the case. The girls we got to know a bit in the premiere are still the girls on which the show is focused. I still donít know the names of a couple of the contestants, which seems weird. However, for purposes of this recap, Iíll be sure to refer to my name and picture guide out so I can accurately depict who did what and what went on for you. Now, on to the recap!

    For three of the girls, tonight will be the end of the quest for title of All American Girl.

    We are reintroduced to the teams. John Salleyís team includes Andrea (the one that almost got away), Ashley (pretty athlete with two left feet), Kelly (who can dance but canít sing), Shauna (crying beauty queen) and ShannonÖ about whom I honestly canít remember anything. Iím sure sheís very pretty.

    Ginger Spiceís team includes Kira (ďI donít shower every day), Melanie (who can sing, but not really do anything else), Kristi (who has always gotten by on her looks), Monica (a former beauty queen, but easily my favorite on Geriís team), and Jessica (who the US Magazine lady said had a big nose).

    Suzanne de Passeís team includes Tarah (who looks 12, but can dance like a champ), Evelyn (class clown with a great voice), Carrie (who sang opera in her auditions as we are constantly reminded), Ali (Menu Suvari wannabe who knows that sex sells) and easy favorite, Natalie.

    In tonightís episode, the 15 girls will face challenges in the areas of fitness, singing, dancing and beauty. Through each of the challenges, the coaches will be watching for the one they will be eliminating from their team.

    Itís early. The girls are waking up, getting dressed, complaining. This morning will begin with fitness trainer to the stars, Daniel Kucan. First team to hit the gym is Salleyís. Daniel stresses to the girls that he wants them to focus on working out instead of focusing on how pretty they are. All the girls do great, but to Daniel, Kelly is the standout. He thinks she is the girl who cares the least about how she looks. Yeah, well Dan, she can do that. Sheís terribly attractive.

    Geriís team is the next to meet Daniel. Mid workout, Geri pulls Kristi aside and offers up a dish of honesty, ďYouíve always gotten by on your looks. You have never had to try. You look like you are giving 80%.Ē Now, I tried to listen to whether Geri said 80% or 18%. I think Kristi was giving 18%, but will give her the benefit of the doubt. Now get to work! You arenít that pretty! Daniel also says that 6í Melanie was giving it her all, but that her all really wasnít all that good. Melanie takes the criticism and refocuses her efforts.

    Last to meet with Daniel is Suzanneís team. Wow. Suzís team isnít very fitness oriented. Carrie canít perform up to par because sheís tired. Apparently high energy Evie woke up singing. Early. Daniel comments that Evie is hiding behind her humor. Time to tone it down and focus. Carrie and Evelyn found their names on Suzís hit list.

    Chop. Chop. Commercial. Commercial. Back to the show with no transition.

    Next all 15 girls get to sit in a room with a bitter woman and be roasted. Oh wait. Thatís not what happened. Itís a beauty makeover. And here I thought it was a bitch trying to break the egos of 15 young, pretty girls. My mistake.

    US Magazine beauty director, Veronica Hinman, picks apart the girls one at a time. Sheís the Simon Cowell of the beauty industry, so while I agreed with much of what she had to say, I thought she could have been a bit nicer about how she said it. So yes, Tarah does look 12, Kellyís nails are clearly those of a Staten Island secretary meant to bring her boss his coffee, Monica does look like a soccer mom in the making with her cute little bob haircut, Evelynís hair could be more exciting, and yes, some of the girls needed to learn that eyebrow tweezing, when done in moderation, can alleviate otherís urges to compare you with Muppets, Ernie and Bert. Where I think she stepped over the line was saying that Geriís girl, Jessica, didnít need to wear a center part as her nose was FAR TOO BIG. Wow. Even Geri gasped at that revelation. In the end, though Veronica gained no friends, in the before/after shots, each of the girls looked better. Tarah might pass for 13 now.

    Chop. Chop. Commercial. Commercial. Back to the show with no transition.

    Now itís the singing portion of the competition. Suzanneís team is the first up singing ďLetís Hear It For The BoyĒ under the watchful eyes of vocal trainer, Michelle Owens, and Suzanne. Natalie is a standout, but each of the girls has a good singing voice. Tarah doesnít do much for me vocally, but sheís at least on key and enthusiastic in her performance.

    Geriís team is up next. Jessica is the standout in Geriís group singing, ďI Donít Wanna Miss A Thing.Ē Granted, I can say that Jessica is the standout as none of the other girls are even shown. Itís just a solo performance by Jessica and I must say that her nose didnít distract me at all.

    Last up is Johnís team. The strongest in the fitness portion, the weakest in the singing department. Iím beginning to realize that Geri has the middle of the road team. Kelly and Andrea make the least impression on John vocally, but I must say he is clearly biased towards Kelly. Andrea and Kelly arenít even in the same league vocally. Not even on the same planet. Andrea can hold a tune. Kelly couldnít carry a tune in a bucket. She begins to cry and John gives her a pep talk which results in Kelly singing bar far the worst rendition of ďNatural WomanĒ ever.

    On that sour note, the first day of competition is complete. Only the dance portion remains before the judges must make their first cuts. Each of the coaches pulls aside the girls on their team that are in jeopardy of being cut. John tells Andrea that sheís going to have to dance her ass off to stay on the team. Geri tells Kristi to stop relying on her looks and start focusing on what sheís doing. That if she wants to remain in the competition, sheís going to have to try. Geri also tells Melanie that sheís concerned that sheís a one trick pony, a great singer, but weak in other areas. Suzanne talks to Evie. She says itís time for Evelyn to quit hiding behind humor and start controlling herself more.

    Chop. Chop. Commercial. Commercial. Back to the show with no transition.

    Bright and early the girls are up and getting ready. After those last minute coach ďpep talks,Ē many of the girls wake up fearful and nauseous believing this is their last day. Poor Evelyn isnít even allowed to crack a joke to break the gloomy mood.

    Ann Inaba is the choreographer who will be teaching the girls a high energy and complex dance routine. Suzanneís team is first up. Standouts are clearly Tarah and Natalie, though itís obvious that everyone is giving it their all. Evelyn, knowing that Suzanne is keeping a close watch on her, buckles a bit under the pressure. Without humor to ease the stress, today is tougher than normal. Poor Evie. Ali is also struggling with the dayís stress, believing that sheíll be the one asked to leave due to her weakness in the dance area.

    Johnís team is next to hit the dance floor. Kelly and Andrea show the most strength in dancing, though the entire group does a good job. Kellyís solo performance bothered me a bitÖ and got John a bit hot and bothered. Kellyís a flirt and her dance made that quite obvious. From what I saw of Ashley, sheís traded in one of her two left feet for a right one. She did a good job from the little bit of her that was shown in the dance portion. There is still a girl on Johnís team that Iíve not seen since they introduced her in the beginning. I think her name is Shannon?

    Last up is Geriís team. Melanie struggles the most with the dance portion, but Iím convinced itís because sheís twice as big as the other girls. It takes 2 beats for all the other girlsí one beat to swing her arm across her body. She honestly looks like a giant compared to the rest of the group. A really pretty, talented singing giant. Iím guessing thereís money to be made in that. However, Kristi manages to not stare at herself in the mirror or reapply her lipstick during the dance and does a fine job of keeping up with the rest of the group. Kristi, keep repeating to yourself, ďIím not just a pretty face. Iím not just a pretty face.Ē Youíll be fine.

    Chop. Chop. Commercial. Commercial. Back to the show with no transition.

    One by one, the girls must face their coach and the possibility of being eliminated. Suzanne meets her team first. Tarah. Safe. Natalie. Safe. Ali. Safe. Hugs all around. Last up are Carrie and Evelyn. The show is set up so you donít really know which of the girls the coach is actually speaking to, but it turns up that Suzanne lets Evelyn go. But not until she tells her that she has the best singing voice in the group. Evie, you handled the let down like a champ. I admire the fact that you held it together, took the criticism constructively and didnít cry. Kudos to you. Now, Iíd like to see that juggling state capital balancing act again!

    John keeps Ashley, beauty queen Shauna who had no air time this episode, Shannon (who?), and has the final two conversation with Andrea and Kelly. In the end he tells Kelly that sheís his favorite, but that she just doesnít have what the other girls have and letís her go.

    Geri puts a scare into Monica by saying ďYouíre through.Ē Monica accepts her rejection well when Geri realizes she meant to say ďYouíre through to the next round.Ē Monica tries to laugh it off, but you can see her heart pounding. Oh that funny dry British humor! After scaring Monica, Geri rephrases her sentence to say, ďYou made it!Ē for team members Kira and Jessica, leaving the bottom two as Kristi and Melanie. Melanie is let go for the fact that she isnít well rounded enough.

    Iíd love to give you previews of the next episode, but in the same choppy manner that the entire episode was aired, after the announcements, the show just ended. Just like that.

    if you have questions or comments, please email me at sher@fansofrealitytv.com

  2. #2
    The new me! Feifer's Avatar
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    Wow! If anyone could make that show interesting it is you Sher. Very well summed up. At least the recap was smooth even if the show was not.
    It occurred to me that no matter how bleak things might seem at times, at least I have a head. ----Stargazer

  3. #3
    Nobody likes a moaner Ashleysmom's Avatar
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    So here is what you did not see. The so called beauty expert from US magazine, Ashley called a beauty natzi. Did I spell that right? Anyhow, they bleeped that. Also the singing expert had something to say to all of them and as I only know what was said to Ashley. She had something to say to all of the girls. She told Ashley that her pitch and range was good and that she had no improvements for her. Ashley said that when she sang that song, John told her that she has outshined everyone, with the singing and dancing. See, she really can dance given 5 hours of training. The thing about Ashley is she is raw talent and that is what makes her unique. I was so upset that they did not showcase each one of the girls. John also told Ashley that she "put that dance down". I wish we all could have seen it. There is going to be a 4 hour AAG on ABC Family this Sunday maybe we will get to see more.

    To Sheri,
    Good job on the recaps.

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    Fabulous fag! ;) Gizmo82's Avatar
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    I couldn't *believe* how horrible the show was put together... someone is clearly having editing issues, and hopefully they take care of that SOON! Great recap Sher! You seem to hit all of the main points from the boring show... so who do you think will be crowned the AAG? Which girls do you think are the strongest from each team? IMO Susanne has a team MUCH stronger than the others, Geri has the middle bunch, and John has the leftovers (sorry!)... I mean, they are VERY pretty... but haven't seen much talent from his team... he was clearly selecting by looks. I think that if you had to pick the top girl from each team, you would get...

    Susanne - Natalie (DUH?!) I think this is the girl to beat, and will end the show being the AAG

    Geri - Jessica... umm... don't know much about her, but I'd say she is my favorite from this team (monica seems sweet too... but don't know ANYTHING AT ALL about her.. other than she was a beauty queen.. and has a cute bob)

    John - Ashley? None of the girls on this team have shown much talent IMO... they are cute, and sporty... but dont know anything about if they can sing or anything....
    "It's still cool to be sane. You're just supposed to be sane and medicated ." - Article from the New York Magazine

  5. #5
    JR.
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    Drummer / Model JR.'s Avatar
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    Bless you Sher for saving me from this mind-numbing show.

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    The race is back! John's Avatar
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    Great job, Sher. The Bert & Ernie reference alone made me glad the women in my life know how to judiciously pluck.

  7. #7
    FORT Fogey
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    Sher, you did an outstanding job!

    I actually watched the show after putting it off as long as possible. I had it on tape and worked out to it.

    I felt the show had a little more cohesiveness to it this time, but not much.

    There were quite a few grating moments, beginning with the abusive Veronica Hinman, beauty expert from US magazine, to the strenuous workout where Daniel Kucan (does anyone else think he looks like Tom Cruise, and not in a good way?) has the girls jumping through hoops, and then last but not least the judges administering the final cut, the one which hurts the most.

    Geri 'Ginger' Halliwell could learn a few things about diplomacy. Those girls are nervous enough. John Salley should restrain himself from drooling all over the girls. Suzanne seems to be the most professional. They've all been told to drag out their final decision as long as possible so that we, the audience, can see the contestants squirm. I really felt for the girls.

    The way things are going, each week is going to be a painful experience and I'm not even talking about the elimination.

    Note to Ashleysmom: Ashley is great! She seems very nice and I really hope she makes it to the end. Good luck!

  8. #8
    Yoffy lifts a finger... fluff's Avatar
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    Just some of my favourite parts

    Geriís team is the next to meet Daniel. Mid workout, Geri pulls Kristi aside and offers up a dish of honesty, ďYouíve always gotten by on your looks. You have never had to try. You look like you are giving 80%.Ē Now, I tried to listen to whether Geri said 80% or 18%. I think Kristi was giving 18%, but will give her the benefit of the doubt. Now get to work! You arenít that pretty!


    Next all 15 girls get to sit in a room with a bitter woman and be roasted. Oh wait. Thatís not what happened. Itís a beauty makeover. And here I thought it was a bitch trying to break the egos of 15 young, pretty girls. My mistake.

    From what I saw of Ashley, sheís traded in one of her two left feet for a right one. She did a good job from the little bit of her that was shown in the dance portion.


    Great job Sher.

    I agree about Melanie. She is always going to look a little ungainly next to some of the smaller girls and I do believe that the routine simply wasn't choreographed for someone of her height and limb length.
    Shame really, but she has a great voice and hopefully will decide to try and pursue a singing career.
    "That's Numberwang!"

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